~~Zach's point of view~~
It's been three weeks since we found Bria on my doorstep. To say things haven't been weird would be an understatement. They haven't been bad, just a bit different. I have another man's child in my home. I have a woman who is deeply in love with that man in my house. I still feel the same way that I did. I still want as much time with her as she will allow me.
She offered to leave. She said she would go back to Callen's. I didn't want that. I know she will go home eventually. Until then, I want her under my roof. The truth is I don't mind Bria here. She and Zoey get along really well, and I have even heard Zoey tell her that she loves her.
This would be perfect if this were our reality. It isn't, and Greenlee and I both know it. I can say that if Callen hadn't come back in the picture, we could have had a good life together. It would have been a life without Love, but it would have been happy. She and I both deserve better than that.
She was honest with me the moment she came home. She sat at the table with Aubrey and me and told us everything. After Aubrey left, she told me that she and I needed to talk about Zoey. She asked that I give her a few weeks. I was willing. She told me this morning before I came to work that she had a meeting with Callen; she said we would need to talk after. I know what it is. I agree with her. I won't tell her I know I'll let her say it. We are both on the same page.
I know that Aubrey is leaving work at lunch to go watch the girls. I don't mind her being in my home. I can see why she and Greenlee are best friends. She is a really sweet girl. She has been amazing through all of this. She and Greenlee got into it right after she came back from Callen's. Aubrey felt that Callen had suffered enough. I stepped in and pointed out the Bria had suffered me than any of the adults.
My phone rings.
~~Phone Conversation~~
Zach: "Hello, Love."
Greenlee: "Hello."
Zach: "What's up?"
Greenlee: "I am headed to see Callen."
Zach: "Are you ok?"
Greenlee: "I am. You and I need to talk. It depends on how this conversation with Callen goes."
Zach: "Why do I hear hesitation?"
Greenlee: "Because today determines how the rest of my life is going to turn out. Either way, it's going to be incredible..."
Zach: "But..."
Greenlee: "I have two incredible men who I have to have in my life. I don't know how to make that work if this conversation with Callen is not good."
Zach: "But you do if it goes well?"
Greenlee: "Yes."
Zach: "You have me so thoroughly confused Love. I thought I knew what today was. I am totally wrong. Let me ease your mind, though. I am not going anywhere. You and I don't have to be together for me to be in your life. I will never walk away. I can't and won't speak for Callen; he has to make his own choices."
Greenlee: "If he doesn't agree today..."
Zach: "If he doesn't agree, what?"
Greenlee: "We will talk about it later."
Zach: "Ok."
I hear her crying. My heart breaks for her.
Greenlee: "Thank you, Zach."
Zach: "I will do anything for you. Love."
Greenlee: "I'll call you when I leave."
Zach: "Sounds good. I hope things go well."
Greenlee: "Bye, Zach."
Zach: "Bye, Love."
~~End conversation~~
I thought I knew what today was. After that conversation, I think I am wrong. I didn't lie to her. I will be in her life for the rest of my life. It is a journey that I am willing to take. I am invested in Greenlee and her children. I pray she gets what she wants today.
~~Callen's point of view~~
Greenlee making me come here was the best thing that could have happened. I reacted. I didn't think things through. In the two weeks after Arianna's death, I received news of the unthinkable. I kept it to myself. Instead of talking it out with Greenlee, I took it out on her. I made a rash decision that could affect the rest of my life. I will have to deal with whatever the consequences are. I created this I have to see the end through even if it isn't in my favor.
The staff here has been amazing. The therapist has been beneficial; I was honest with him about everything; I was honest about my life with Ari. I was honest about how Greenlee came into our lives. I was honest about how I felt after she came into our lives. I was honest about the truths that I learned after Ari's death. I opened up about my entire life to him. He is patient, and he listens. He isn't afraid to celebrate my good and dissect my bad.
I probably should have seen a therapist way before now. Ari and I built a picture-perfect life. It was never really that way. Arianna and I got together at a very young age. We were married fifteen years, but we were together twenty-five. We got together when we were both ten years old. Of course, neither of us knew what it would turn into. I was the rich kid who craved love from his parents; she was the daughter of the housemaid.
Callie and I rarely saw our parents. Ari's mom was our mother, and her dad was the only male we had in our lives. It was never a question of who I would marry. There was never an option. We both did well in school and got scholarships, which landed us at the same college and law school. That is how we ended up in Nashville, TN. After we got married, we moved to this tiny town. This is where Ari made her money. She did exceptionally well for herself, then we partnered.
I had money, but that didn't mean I didn't work. I still haven't touched the money my parents left. I had plenty on my own. Arianna and I were amazing apart but even better together. I will never stop loving her. I know Greenlee doesn't want that. I do struggle with what I found out after.
I found out and went to look for Greenlee. I wanted to talk it out with her. I saw her in a grocery store with Zach and his daughter; they looked happy; I had already visited the bottle. I went home and lost myself in it. I neglected my daughter and pushed the best thing that ever happened to me into the arms of another man. I did that before I even picked up the bottle.
Here I realized that the contract I had Greenlee sign was forcing her into a life she may not have wanted. Here I also realized that the agreement led me to my true soulmate. That Greenlee is supposed to the one, I spend the rest of my life with. I can't, and I won't force her. I will sit and hear her out today; I will accept whatever decision she makes; I owe her that much.
I was sitting in a chair with my feet up in a quiet room when I see her at the door.
I can't help but smile; I love her with all my heart. She is carrying my baby. She is having my son. She was willing to give me everything I wanted, and I threw it all away. Today could determine the rest of my life. I do know one thing for sure; I will never take another drink again. I promised her sixty days here, and I will do my sixty days.
I meet her halfway. I pull her to me and kiss her. I thought she would push me away, but she didn't. Maybe this conversation won't be as bad as I think it's going to be. She breaks our kiss and looks up at me.
Greenlee: "Can we go to your room? I don't want to have this conversation here."
Callen: "Of course."
She's nervous. I can feel her nerves radiating off of her. I want so bad just to pull her to my bed in my room and hold her. I can't do that, though; she isn't mine. She belongs to Zach right now. I am the reason for that; I can't blame either of them.
~~Greenlee's point of view~~
I walked in and saw him there, and my heart about exploded in my chest. He is who I want. I want a life with him and our children. That depends on how this conversation goes today. As much as I love him, I can walk away if things don't go well. I need certain things to happen. I need to know that he can handle it.
The last three weeks with Bria and Zoey at home certified my feelings. The best thing ever is hearing them both call me Mommy. Well, I get Mama from Bria. The bond that has formed between the two of them already is the best feeling in the world. It's been three weeks, but if you ask Zoey, she will tell you Bria is her baby sister. She will also tell you that Mommy is having her baby brother.
That is what makes these conversations today hard. I need to talk to Callen first. I need to get his feelings on it. Once I know how he feels, then I will talk to Zach. The conversation with Zach may be moot after this conversation with Callen. My whole life depends on this conversation. I follow him to his room. It shouldn't turn me on, but it does. Seeing him in those tight ass jeans and his bare feet. My body knows what it wants, and it wants him.
He steps into his room, and I walk past him. He shuts the door, then pulls me to him and kisses me. I let it happen but break it quickly. This conversation has to happen.
Callen: "I'm sorry, Sweetheart."
Greenlee: "It's ok. This conversation just really needs to happen."
Callen: "I agree. I just need an answer to one question."
Greenlee: "What's that?"
Callen: "Have you been sexually active with Zach since bringing me here?"
Greenlee: "No. I moved back to my room. Bria has been in my bed with me every night so has Zoey. The most that has happened is we hug, and he kisses my cheek. We do cuddle because I am pregnant, and sometimes, I need to fucking cuddle."
He laughs.
Greenlee: "You should know that Bria calls me Mama. I haven't and will not correct her."
Callen: "I don't have a problem with that. I am curious as to how she picked it up."
Greenlee: "Zoey. Zoey calls me Mommy and has since the first week in their home."
Callen: "I see."
Greenlee: "She is the reason for this conversation."
Callen: "What does Zoey have to do with me?"
Greenlee: "A lot."
Callen: "Please explain."
Greenlee: "Zach and I got close quickly. The bond between Zoey and I happened even quicker. She is my child just as much as Bria and our baby. I wanted to talk to you first because I made you promise, and I plan on keeping those; however, there is one thing that will break them."
Callen: "Zoey?"
Greenlee: "Yes."
I pull the papers from my purse and hand them to him.
Greenlee: "Don't be me. Read them thoroughly."
He laughs.
He reads every page. He stays quiet. He locks eyes with me when he is done but doesn't speak. I know he needs time to process it. That paper will make or break the relationship between Callen and me. That paper determines the rest of my life.
Callen: "Is this what you want?"
Greenlee: "It is."
Callen: "How would this work?"
Greenlee: "I need to talk to Zach. I need to work that out with him."
Callen: "This is forever."
Greenlee: "It is. This is my life now, Callen. I am her mother. I am all she knows."
Callen: "I understand. You are all Bria knows. I want this same thing for you and her."
Greenlee: "Once you are straight, it's happening with her too. I can't marry you and live in your home if you can't accept that I am going to co-parent with Zach."
Callen: "And you're telling me there is no relationship between the two of you."
Greenlee: "There isn't. There was. While it was happening, it was wonderful; life changes. People change. This is what I was supposed to do. I had to go through heartbreak with you to find her. This was how my path was supposed to go. I have two incredible men in my life, and I am not willing to give either up."
Callen: "You're my property, Greenlee. You know that. I will not share you."
Greenlee: "I'm not asking you to. I am asking you to accept a child in your life that isn't yours. Zoey will determine how our relationship goes."
Callen: "How do you know Zach will be willing to do this?"
Greenlee: "That is my next conversation. I need to know if you're willing to do this. If you aren't willing to do this, then the entire conversation that I have to have with Zach will be completely different."
Callen: "This guarantees that Zach stays in your life."
Greenlee: "It does. I don't need to have a sexual relationship with him. I do need him in my life. I will not abandon them because you want us to work. YOU are the reason they came into my life."
Callen: "This is a deal-breaker for you?"
Greenlee: "Absolutely, it is."
Callen: "How do you see this working?"
Greenlee: "If he agrees to this, I am no longer working. I have enough money to live my life, thanks to Arianna. He works. He loves his job; I would have her during the day. Which means you will be around her."
Callen: "She would know Bria and the baby as her siblings?"
Greenlee: "She would."
Callen: "How old is she?"
Greenlee: "She had just turned two when I met her. She is now two and a half."
Callen: "Where is her mother?"
Greenlee: "She had a heart attack at twenty-eight and died."
Callen: "She is too little to understand what's happening."
Greenlee: "That is why I need it to happen now. She will grow up with you both in her life. I need you to make a decision."
I'm pretty sure I already know what Zach is going to say. If he can't accept Zoey, then there is no us. No matter how much I love him, it won't work. He put me in this position; he now has to deal with the consequences. This all rests in his hands.
Callen: "You'll marry me if I accept her?"
Greenlee: "Not just accept her. I will marry you if you decide to love her. If you can't love her, I can't love you."
Callen: "You do love me, though."
Greenlee: "I do. I love my children more."
Callen: "I need to meet her. You are asking me to love a child I don't even know."
Greenlee: "You are here for five more weeks. I will bring both girls when I come if you want me to. Either way, this is happening, Callen. I don't want any secrets. I don't want any surprises."
Callen: "I am willing to try if it means you'll be my wife."
Greenlee: "That is all I am asking."
He stands up and walks over to me. He pulls me out of my chair.
Callen: "I am willing to move heaven and earth for you. A child, especially one that you love, is not something that is going to end us. Lord knows I did enough of that on my own. I need you to make a commitment to me right here, right now. I need to hear you say that you are mine."
Greenlee: "I'm yours, Callen. I have and always will be."
His mouth comes down on mine.
We sit and talk until the end of visiting hours. Now I have to go home and have another hard conversation. I purposely avoided the discussion of moving back to Callen's house. I will discuss that with him after I have this conversation with Zach.
I make it home and cook dinner; I tell Aubrey about the conversation and my plan., We all sit and have dinner. Aubrey helps me clean and then leaves. We bathe the babies and set them in the living room with cartoons. Zach and I go to the table.
Zach: "What's going on, Love?"
I hand him the adoption papers. He reads them then sits in silence. I give him time to gather his thoughts.
Zach: "You really want to do this?"
Greenlee: "I do. All you have to do is sign them."
Zach: "I know you're going back to Callen; how does he feel about this?"
Greenlee: "He doesn't get me without her. I love him, but my children come first. This also guarantees me that you will stay in my life forever."
Zach: "That is going to happen, no matter what."
Greenlee: "She doesn't and won't remember her real mom. I want that opportunity."
Zach: "I want the same thing. My biggest fear in all of this was that Zoey would get pushed aside. I didn't want that to happen."
Greenlee: "I figured I have her while you work, then you get her at night."
Zach: "That way, she has us both."
Greenlee: "Exactly."
He sits quietly for several more minutes. Again, I let him gather his thoughts. This is a huge decision. One that I don't want him to take lightly.
~~Zach's point of view~~
She and I were meant to be in each other's lives. I know that we aren't meant to be together. I also know that I can't live without her; this is what I wanted for Zoey. I didn't know how to bring it up; I didn't have to; Greenlee did.
Zach: "Do you have a pen?"
Greenlee: "Really?"
Zach: "Yes. I'll even take them to the courthouse tomorrow."
She stands up and wraps her arms around me.
Greenlee: "I love you Zach."
Zach: "I love you too."
We both know what kind of love it is. Neither of us needs to question it. We cuddle on the couch with the girls until Greenlee gets tired. I help her get the girls in her bed then go to my room. My phone rings with a number I don't know.
~Phone conversation~
Zach: "Hello?"
Callen: "Zach, this is Callen Bryant. I think it's time you and I have a discussion."
Zach: "I agree."
Callen: "I can't leave the center."
Zach: "I'll come tomorrow. You make an excuse as to why she can't come during visitor hours tomorrow."
Callen: "I got that covered."
Zach: "I'll see you, then."
~End conversation~
That was unexpected but necessary. If this man is going to be in my daughters' life, I need to know him. I can't judge him based on his addiction. I trust Greenlee's judgment. I do want to form an opinion on my own. He just opened the door for me to have that chance.