(Warnings: Violence/fighting. Eventual CNC. Ya know, the usual.)
"I can't keep pushing this off." Hux said in a hushed tone. "It's time we talk about Kylo Ren."
Oh, Kylo Ren. Sure. No big deal. Just the man that you were madly in love with. The same one that was planning to kill the man across from you and the same one who had just fucked you in the bathroom while holding a knife to your throat.
You were surprised that it took this long for him to be brought up again. There was that time, when Hux stopped by unannounced and Kylo had to hide in the closet. That had been the confrontation that was closest to this. But this was so much worse.
You were so frustrated. In just a few days, Hux was supposed to be dead and this was all supposed to be over. But this could complicate things and god, you really hoped not. You were so sick of hiding and waiting.
"What about him?" You asked Hux, trying your best to hide the way that the mention of his name made your heart pound practically out of your chest. This wasn't good, you could sense it. You saw the way that Kylo was being scolded by Snoke and based on the look on Hux's face, he wasn't happy either.
"What about him? Really?" Hux repeated in an incredulous tone, an angry chuckle leaving his chest. "How about this? I know you just snuck off with him at our own engagement party. Who knows what the fuck you did together but I would place high bets on the fact that it wasn't the first time."
You said nothing, mind reeling.
"It wasn't the first time, was it?" Hux asked you, disgusted, "Actually don't even answer that because I know the truth. I see the way you look at each other, the way he talks to you, fuck, the way he talks about you...He lives down the hall from you, I don't even want to think about how much time you two probably spend together."
You weren't sure what to say. You spent so much time denying your relationship with Kylo that seeing him talk to blatantly about it caught you off guard. You weren't sure if you should keep up the act or come clean. You wondered what Kylo would tell you to do, you wished he were there to help you.
Hux was infuriated by your silence and from the dumbstruck look on your face. You had the ability to ruin the lives of people around you and then act innocent about it, it drove him crazy.
Hux had always been suspicious about you and Kylo. Even from the first couple of weeks that he moved back and Kylo revealed that he stopped by your college's gallery to see your art and he made that large donation in your name, Hux knew that he should be suspicious.
But now, you had shown him right to his face and worse, you had done it right in front of Snoke as well.
He moved so that he had you closer to the wall, in the corner of the hallway so that you weren't able to move around and walk away from him. "You think you're so much smarter than me, don't you? That I'm oblivious to what you've been doing behind my back for months?"
"Armie-" You started but he interrupted you.
"Don't call me that." He said quickly, eyes set narrowly on you. "Don't talk to me like you love me because I'm fully aware that you don't. You haven't loved me for a while." Hux said to you, still keeping you backed in the corner.
"Well it's not like you love me. You never did." You quickly countered, "I don't know if you've ever even liked me." You said, thinking about it. When did he ever demonstrate that he was interested in a word you had to say if you weren't stroking his ego?
"And you think Ren does?" Hux asked you, almost amused despite his frustration. "Can you honestly say that you think Kylo Ren loves you?"
You were silent, thinking of all the times Kylo told you so, how he had said it to you in the bathroom moments ago, even. You knew Kylo loved you. You never had to question it because you felt it too.
"That's hilarious." Hux began laughing, shaking his head. "Don't be delusional. He's using you. From the very beginning he used you to get under my skin...You fell for it, you're still falling for it."
"You don't know what you're talking about and I'd stop before I have to say things that will hurt you." You told him in a warning tone. Hux was putting the pieces together but you were sure he didn't know all the details. You had so many things you could tell him that would humiliate him. You could tell him all the reasons you knew Kylo loved you if you needed to.
"In order to hurt me, I'd have to care about you." Hux said lowly, locking eyes with you in a way that made your stomach drop. It wasn't that his words themselves hurt you but he had never spoken to you like this before, mainly because he never wanted to deal with the fallout of being honest with you. But it was almost scary, to see the amount of resentment that he hid away from you at all times.
Hux noticed the look on your face and it just upset him further. "Don't act so surprised, have you forgotten why we got together in the first place? This was never some romantic love story." He asked you, his tone was quieter than what he wanted to express, not wanting anyone in the next room to hear.
You thought back to it. You were supposed to be killed, for killing the troopers who killed your father. But Hux saved you by making up some excuse that he could interrogate you separately and get more information from you. When it came time to kill you, you told Hux you loved him so that he would spare your life. And he convinced himself he loved you too. For whatever reason, Snoke let him keep you around. What a mistake.
"All I wanted was more involvement in the mob and the picture perfect life. I wanted a nice house, a beautiful wife, a lot of money and a lot of power..." Hux began explaining to you. "You can't bring just any woman into this life and when I saw you, I realized you were perfect because of the situation you were in. I thought I'd never have to question your loyalty because your loyalty to me and this lifestyle was a threat that I could always hold over your head. But it wasn't enough was it? You still had to betray me."
This entire time you were with Hux, you knew it was just a transaction. He saved your life and paid for you to do what you wanted so in return, you just had to act like his happy, subservient girlfriend. And you were able to do that for a while but you couldn't live that way forever. If it hadn't been Kylo, it would've been someone or something else to make you realize that.
"All you had to do was mind your business and take what I provided for you and do a few favors for me every once and awhile. But you had to ruin it all by going behind my back and doing the one thing that would upset me the most." Hux hissed, finger pointing at you accusingly, "You let Ren win."
Everything was so much easier before Kylo got here. As unhappy as you were, it was so much easier to just go along with whatever Hux wanted. But you didn't regret any of it for a second. Not even now, when you felt like you could puke because you were so scared and nervous for what might happen in the future. You still would do it a million times over if it meant being with Kylo.
"I don't think there's anything I could've or couldn't have done. You know it too. No matter what, Kylo was always going to win." You said to Hux, finding your voice again, feeling more bold at the thought of the man you loved.
Hux's face flashed red, eyebrows shooting up.
At his silence, you continued. "Did you really think you'd be able to become more powerful than him? It doesn't matter if I was involved or not. Kylo will always have more respect than you and you're going to waste your entire life trying to chase after something unattainable. You're never going to be happy if you're working towards something you can't accomplish, if I were-"
Your ranting was cut off by the impact that you had just felt across your face.
Hux slapped you. Hard.
It was the first time he'd ever laid hands on you like that. You knew the other mob members did it to their girlfriends and wives. Most of them only knew violence and using it to get what they wanted, their romantic relationships were no different. But Hux had always restrained himself, preferring to just remove himself from the argument before it got to that point. But you were both so past that now, it was all so different.
You were in shock and judging by the look on Hux's face, he was as well. He hadn't even meant to do it, he was just so embarrassed and angry by your words that he acted on impulse. You were no longer his fianceé in his eyes. You were his enemy.
Not wanting to admit that he lost control of the situation, Hux pushed you against the corner, your back against the wall and him holding you in place, keeping up the act. "You're probably so proud of yourself, aren't you? For keeping this a secret for so long, for getting one over on me." He hissed, hand on your shoulders to keep you in place.
Subconsciously you could feel a warmness leaving your nose, indicating to you that it was bleeding. Great, just what you needed.
"Well guess what? You haven't been the only one. Do you really think I haven't been seeing women behind your back the entire time we've been together?" Hux asked, smirking slightly at the expression on your face. "Do you think people didn't know about it? I bet they felt so bad for you. Turns out, you were just as bad as me, I spent so much time feeling guilty for fucking people while I was with you but that was so stupid. I should've let myself enjoy it like you do with him."
You supposed that shouldn't surprise you. You haven't had sex with him in such a long time and you had almost expected him to get it somewhere else. But you were somewhat shocked that he'd been able to hide it from you in the beginning, if he was telling the truth about that.
"Actually, you can tell your new best friend, what's his name, Vicrul? That the reason he hasn't been seeing his girlfriend much is because she's been with me." Hux grinned, satisfied, "She told me that he's been worried about him finding out, you might as well tell him. We both know your loyalty lies there anyways."
Although he wasn't a saint himself, the idea of cheating on someone as sweet and handsome as Vicrul was mind blowing to you but not exactly shocking. Most of the mob girlfriends were just climbers and would be with whoever had the most power to get more of it themselves. Even though Vicrul might be a better boyfriend in multiple aspects, Hux was higher on the mafia food chain than him. And although Hux said it in a condescending way, you did consider Vic your closest friend right now. You felt the need to defend him.
"What a downgrade for her." You said simply, raising an eyebrow as a smirk grew on your face. It was almost as if you could see the steam comically coming out of Hux's ears at that statement.
Usually you did your best to keep things civil so that it didn't escalate between the two of you. But feeling the blood leaving your nose from the slap he gave you was sort of ending that pacificity.
Hux blinked in response, trying to collect himself. You were never this bold. He couldn't help but realize that your sarcastic remark is something that Kylo would easily say. In fact, when you said it, he almost heard it replayed in his mind as Kylo's voice.
That made him even angrier. Kylo was so skilled with taking over every aspect of Hux's life and wrenching it away from him. It wasn't fair.
WIthout thinking, letting his rage take over, Hux slapped you again.
This time you audibly groaned, still pained from the first time he did it. You instantly fought back, bringing a knee up to his stomach, making him double over in pain.
"Do you feel better?" You asked him, wiping at the blood on your nose. "Hitting me really solved all your problems, didn't it? Good job." You added, more irritated by the smacks that he had landed on you than anything else.
"You're such a bitch." He grumbled, the air knocked out of him from the way that you had hit his stomach.
"I know." You replied, unable to stop the smirk that was on your lips as you did so as you watched him struggle to catch his breath.
The entire time that you and Hux had been arguing, Kylo had been dealing with his own demons as well. The demon in question being Snoke.
Right when Hux dragged you away to the hallway, Snoke had taken Kylo outside with him, through the back door where the two of them could be alone:
"This engagement was supposed to stop the two of you." Snoke said, puffing on a cigar, barely even glancing over at the man he was speaking to.
"I don't know what you mean." Kylo said, playing dumb.
Snoke let out a humorless chuckle, shaking his head. "No amount of pussy is worth killing yourself over. You get that, right? Don't tell me you see her as anything more than just that because she's not. I can get you ten girls to replace her in a heartbeat."
Kylo's jaw clenched but he said nothing, knowing better than to talk back to his boss. But the thought of replacing you with someone else was almost laughable. It would be impossible, you were so special to him.
"I asked Hux to propose to her because I thought it would keep you away from her. I don't mind if she distracts him but I couldn't have her keep distracting you. You and Hux can hate each other all that you want but once the other men started finding out that it was all because of some girl...You were losing respect very quickly, Ren. I can't have that." Snoke finally glanced over with a look of disgust.
Kylo averted his eyes. He hated to admit it but whenever he was around Snoke, he reverted back to a younger and insecure version of himself. He couldn't help it. Snoke was the one who took him in and made him who he was today, he would always feel the need to please him and even if he was doing well, he never felt like he was good enough.
"So then why wouldn't you let me be with her? Have me propose to her instead of Hux to keep him away?" Kylo asked in a small voice, "It doesn't exactly look good that your underboss lost the fight to your consigliere, does it?"
Snoke laughed out loud at that, a dark and menacing chuckle. "I didn't want you to be with her because I didn't want her to ruin you. You've been so hesitant lately, not wanting to leave to go on meetings for me or choosing the least dangerous runs to go on...I'm not stupid, Ren, I know why. You think of her with every choice you make. I can't have you do that anymore, you're bringing down the entire organization with your softness."
Kylo felt like he was being scolded and really, he was. He swallowed hard. His life would be so much easier if he wasn't in love with you.
He needed to say something to satisfy Snoke.
"What if I told you that we were done sneaking around? This was it. Her engagement party was what we decided our last night together was. Starting tomorrow, we're done." Kylo asked Snoke, still unable to look at him as he spoke. It was a lie. He was far from willing to leave you. But he was also willing to say anything to get Snoke off of his back right now.
Snoke was staring at Kylo in a searching, suspicious way. "You've done nothing to betray my trust in the time I've known you. I hope you're telling the truth because that would be very wise of you. Walk away from her tonight and don't look back." He advised him.
Kylo nodded, "Yes, sir." He said in a faraway voice, trying to do his best to pretend that it was the case.
Snoke placed a hand on his shoulder, patting him there. "Do the right thing, Ren. Do what's best for the family, you know what you need to do."
When Kylo got back into the party, the Knights were oblivious to everything that had just gone on. In their eyes, he had just gotten laid in the bathroom and was probably ready to keep partying. So, of course, they were all doing shots while waiting for him to come back.
"We want you to have two because you need to catch up to us." Trudgen grinned, holding up one of the little glasses of amber liquid up to Kylo.
Kylo was obviously grumpy but didn't make any attempt to explain what was going on. His mind was going too quickly and he was too focused on what he needed to do next to say any of it out loud. Wordlessly, he grabbed the shot glass and tipped it back, needing a little bit of something to help him relax after the conversation he just had.
The Knights cheered for him, happy that he was drinking the alcohol provided, but Vicrul could see that something was up. "What happened?" He asked Kylo, growing wary at the lack of response from him.
Kylo shook his head, not wanting to talk about it right now. "Where is she?" He asked. He didn't need to say your name, everyone knew who he was talking about. His eyes scanned around the room, trying to find you in the sea of people.
Vicrul shrugged in response and glanced over at the other Knights who shrugged as well. They had been so caught up in getting a round of drinks that they didn't keep their eyes on you. To be fair, it wasn't like the Knights thought that you were in danger at your own party.
Kylo rolled his eyes at their uselessness. He grabbed the other shot glass and drank it, setting it back on the table. "If I don't come back, come find me." He said to Vicrul, trusting him the most out of all of the guys regardless of their drunken state.
Vicrul gave him a nod of understanding. He hated seeing Kylo unsure, he always seemed like he knew what was going on.
As Hux recovered from the way you kneed his stomach, Kylo was turning the corner and entering the hallway that the two of you were standing in. He stopped in his tracks when his eyes landed on you. Mostly, because you were who he was looking for. But also, because of the blood that you were wiping away from your nose.
Kylo paced towards the two of you, a deadly look on his face, his fists clenching and unclenching as he did so.
You shook your head at Kylo, "It's not worth it." You said to him, starting to move towards him in hopes to get in between him and Hux. As much as you'd love to see Kylo beat Hux's ass, this was the worst place to do so and you didn't want anything getting in the way of him actually killing him when he planned to.
Hux straightened up abruptly at the sound of footsteps and when he realized that you were speaking to someone. When he saw that it was Kylo who was approaching him, he groaned under his breath, not ready for this.
"What happened?" Kylo asked, motioning towards you. Hux wasn't answering fast enough so he grabbed him by his shirt, backing him up so that he had him pressed against the wall. "Huh? What the fuck happened?" He growled, "Did you fucking touch her? Did you hurt her?"
"Kylo-" You tried to interrupt, wiping quickly at your nose as if you could remove the blood and calm him down if he wasn't seeing it.
Hux was attempting to push Kylo off of him but it was difficult because he didn't have any leverage with the way that his back was against the wall. "It's over, Ren. Let it go." He said through gritted teeth, pushing him away.
"It hasn't started." Kylo said, angrily swinging and meeting Hux's face with his fist, punching him in the face. "You're such a fucking pussy and everyone knows it. You think you'll feel like more of a man if you hit her? You're pathetic." Kylo hissed while punching Hux again.
You were frozen, watching this go down. You weren't sure how to intervene. Physically, you couldn't. They were both bigger than you, there wouldn't be a way for you to separate the two of them. But you knew this was so stupid, Snoke was in the next room.
Hux spit in Kylo's face and used the way that it surprised him to push him away from him. Hux moved from the wall, landing a punch to Kylo's stomach before hitting him in the face as well when he doubled over.
"Stop! Don't do this here." You tried to interrupt them and stand in between them. You knew if Kylo thought you were going to get hurt, he'd stop right away.
But Hux was pushing you out of the way and telling you to leave them alone. "Get cleaned up, go back to the party." He ordered you. He didn't want you around (mainly so you didn't see the way Kylo was most likely going to kick his ass) but he also didn't want anyone seeing the blood on your face.
"No. Get the Knights." Kylo said to you, wiping his face off as he approached Hux again, hands up in a pose ready to hit him or defend himself if he needed to.
You nodded, comfortable with taking Kylo's orders instead of Hux's. You took one last look at the two of them before rushing off to the main party area.
Hux groaned under his breath at the way that you obviously obeyed Kylo over him. It was like a slap to his face. And then, as the back of Kylo's hand came down on his cheek, there was another slap to his face, a real one.
You made your way into the main party room, ignoring all of the whispers and stares that you were receiving. It was really not what anyone was expecting. To see the woman who the engagement party was for, rushing into the room with her nose and expensive dress covered in blood.
When the Knights caught a glimpse of you, they all quickly stood up from the table they were crowded around. They all had been discussing whether it was time for them to go find out what Kylo was up to and seeing you in the state that you were currently in, they realized that they probably should've tried to find him a few minutes ago.
You said nothing but when you saw that they were ready to follow you, you began moving back towards the hallway. They were closely behind you, telling the people who were staring at you to mind their business and stay there when guests made the move to follow you.
As the group of you got back into the hallway, it was clear to you that the fight quickly escalated in the time that you left the two men alone. They were currently on the ground, Kylo on top of Hux landing various punches to his face and chest while Hux was holding his arms up in defense and landing hits where he could.
The Knights moved in around the pair and attempted to move Kylo off of him but he pushed them away. Even though he had been the one to tell you to get them, now that he was actually beating Hux's ass, he didn't want to stop. They had so much tension and unfinished business that this fight was a way to release it.
"Go ahead. Let them end the fight, Ren. You make them do everything for you anyways." Hux coughed out. He was trying to say something that gave off fake confidence because in reality he felt like an idiot for getting his ass kicked at his own party. This was definitely not how he envisioned the night going.
At that, Kylo punched him again, "You're lucky I don't fucking kill you right now." He growled, holding down the man below him with his knee to his stomach. "If Snoke wasn't here you'd have a bullet in your face instead of my fist."
Hux let out a strained laugh, blocking a hit with his arms. "If Snoke wasn't here I would've kicked you out the second you walked in the door." He said to him, "I guess I should've done that anyways because if you weren't here, how else would you have been able to sneak away and fuck my whore of a fianceé?"
You reacted to that statement, taking a step towards the pair and Vicrul grabbed your arm to hold you back so that you stayed in your place. Nothing would be accomplished by walking over and stomping on Hux's head but damn, would it be satisfying.
Kylo reacted to his statement as well. As much as Hux could talk shit about him, the second that you were brought up, it was hard for him to control his anger. You weren't a whore, you were his princess.
He reached into his suit jacket, pulling out a gun and pressing it under Hux's chin. "Keep talking. What was she again? Say it." Kylo urged him, eyes wild and chest heaving. "Just because she'd rather fuck me than you doesn't make her a whore. It makes her smart." He said, unable to stop the dark smirk on his face.
Kylo continued, "What if I was the last thing you saw before you died? How would that feel, Hux? To know that you'd be looking into the eyes of the man who was inside of your fianceé a few minutes ago?"
Hux was frozen in place. Even though he knew that Kylo probably wouldn't kill him right then and there, he was also aware of how angry the man was on top of him, almost feral and he could smell the whiskey on his breath. He was nervous that he'd lose control and pull the trigger.
"Kylo, don't." You warned him. Even though the plan was to kill Hux, this was not the time or place. There were so many people in the next room that would be involved and there would be no way to hide it from Snoke if he was in the same building.
Kylo's head snapped towards you and took in the way that you were nervously staring at him. Seeing your wide eyes and the blood on your skin reminded him of what he was doing at this party in the first place. He loved you and if he killed Hux right now, it would ruin his chances of being with you.
"She's right." A voice said from behind you. Snoke's. "Get off of him, Ren."
Kylo's determination quickly dissolved when he saw his boss standing beside you, staring down at him disapprovingly. Once again, he felt like a child and right now, he felt like he was being caught doing something that was going to get him in trouble. His angry eyes slowly faded away to large worried ones.
"And put that gun away. Don't be stupid." Snoke added, irritation evident in his voice. He then looked down at you, a sneer on his face. "Go home. Everyone needs to go home, the party's over."
You swallowed hard and looked over, watching the way that Kylo got off of Hux and the two men shakily stood up, wiping the blood off of themselves and straightening out their expensive suits in vain.
Kylo's gaze met yours, eye twitching. All he wanted to do was hold you.
You were back at your apartment now, the warm water from your shower hitting your back. You didn't know how to feel. Everything escalated so quickly at the party, it was supposed to be quick and easy. You left in a car sent for you before Kylo did and you were getting worried at the fact that he hadn't stopped by your apartment yet. You hoped he was okay.
Rinsing the shampoo from your hair with a sigh, you were relieved when you heard the faraway sound of your door unlocking and shutting.
"It's me." Kylo's voice called out, "It's daddy." He added and you could hear the smirk in his voice as he did so.
You wiped away a small portion of the steam that collected on your shower door so you were able to look out of it. You watched as Kylo entered the bathroom, still wearing his rumpled and stained suit from earlier. He must've come here straight from the party. After he got naked, he stepped into the shower, letting out a billow of steam as he did so.
You stepped away from the stream of water so that he could get under it. You tried to avoid the blood that swirled around the drain as it washed off of his body, in between his feet.
You were quiet, you weren't sure what to say.
Kylo was just as silent as you were. Really, he was embarrassed at how angry he'd gotten earlier.
"What happens now?" You asked him in a faraway voice, unable to meet his eyes. You continued to stare at the blood mixing with the water on the tiles of your shower.
"I don't know." He said to you in a mumble, reaching over to grab some soap.
You bit your lip. You hated when he didn't know the answers, he always did. It made you so uneasy.
"The plan originally was to kill Hux tomorrow. I knew exactly how we were going to do it, all the details." Kylo explained, running his hands over his chest, leaving lathers of soap behind. "It'll be harder now. He's more suspicious and Snoke might not believe my cover up."
You didn't say anything for a while as you thought about it. "I can't keep doing this." When you met his dark eyes, you let your resolve crumble, your lip quivering. "I can't keep waiting around."
Kylo made a grunt of agreement, turning away from you so that he could let the water run over his face and chest. He was so sick of waiting around too.
With his back towards you, you let the tears fall from your eyes. You were so frustrated. Tonight was supposed to just be a few hours of being miserable and pretending to be in love with Hux to please Snoke. Kylo was supposed to kill Hux soon and all of this could be over. You could be together. But he fucked that all up tonight by fighting with him the way he did. Now, Hux's death was going to be traced right back to Kylo, he would be the first suspect in Snoke's mind.
Kylo quickly turned around when he heard you sniffle, the sounds of you crying.
You ducked your head from him, suddenly embarrassed. You wanted to be strong for him all of the time, you hated when you weren't able to be.
"Why are you upset?" He asked you, his voice steady even though he had a deep frown on his face.
"Why am I upset?" You repeated, frustration bubbling up. "I'm upset because I feel like we talk about the same shit everyday. We keep saying that Hux will be gone soon, we'll be together soon, everything will be okay soon. But I just want it now. I don't care if that's ignorant or selfish. I want you, Kylo. I'm so fucking tired of this."
It was always Kylo's instant reaction to feel defensive when he knew he was upsetting someone. And he almost got that way with you, he was ready to defend the reason why it was taking so long, to explain all of the tiny details that were important to make sure things went according to plan. But then he heard your words, that you wanted him, and saw the desperate look in your eyes and the aggression faded away.
He made his way over to you, pushing his wet hair away from his face. "I know, princess." He said in a gentle voice. Kylo put his fingers under your chin, tilting your head so that you were forced to look up at him. "I shouldn't have lost control earlier but when I saw that he hurt you..." He trailed off, swallowing hard at the memory of blood on your face. "I know it's tough but I mean it when I say this will all be over very soon."
You frowned but your heart thumped at the honest way he was speaking to you.
"Do you trust me?" Kylo asked you. He knew you did but there was still a spark of suspicion in him. He'd never understand how he deserved someone like you.
"Yes." You answered him, eyes on his. "I trust you, Kylo. I'm just getting exhausted from this."
"Me too." Kylo sighed, his fingers caressing your skin as he continued to hold you in place. "But you're such a good girl for me. You've done such a good job being patient while I figure things out." He said to you before leaning down and kissing you softly.
You practically melted into his arms, sighing into the way it felt so good to just relax because he was here with you. This night had been so stressful and all you wanted to do was rely on him and know that it was going to be okay.
He pulled away from you, hand trailing up and down your arm. "You know daddy's gonna take care of you, don't you? It's hard right now but it won't always be this way. I'll give you everything you want, I promise."
You nodded, "Okay, daddy." You agreed with him and hearing you call him that nickname on your own made Kylo widely grin, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you in closer to his chest.
"Let me get you clean so I can make you cum, princess. Would you like that?" Kylo asked you, eyes dancing just at the mention of it. He felt guilty for making tonight hard and he still felt protective over you after seeing you get hurt and deal with the stress of all of it.
Your grin matched his now, standing on your toes so that you could kiss him. You'd definitely like that.
Kylo took his time washing your body and hair. His strong hands that had punched Hux until he bled and almost pulled the trigger on him as well, were the same hands that ran through your hair and over your skin, so gentle and careful. You'd both been quiet for the rest of the shower, finding comfort in the company of each other.
It didn't matter how chaotic everything else was right now. You had each other and this moment.
He had you wrapped up in one of your plush towels, drying you off while his own towel was resting on his hips. As much as you wanted all of this struggle to be over, being alone with him right now and having him be so attentive with you was enough to make you forget it all. At least just for the next couple of hours, before you two had to wake up in the morning and face everything.
No matter how sweet he was being to you right now, you still felt a creeping sensation of frustration at the fact that you two had been so close to finishing what you had planned and Kylo's fight tonight had set the two of you back. You needed him to distract you.
Kylo could see that your mind was wandering, gears turning in thought, and he bent down. He picked you up from the ground, earning a surprised laugh from you as he held you close to his chest. He made his way into your bedroom and set you down gently on the bed, the towel that he'd previously wrapped around you opening slightly.
Kylo stood from the side of the bed, staring down at you with a concentrated look in his eyes. His fingers ran from your thigh up to the material of the towel. He pushed it away, slowly revealing your naked body to him. He inhaled at the sight of it, fingers trailing up from your thigh up to your stomach, to your breasts.
You reacted to his touch, goosebumps forming and you began squirming underneath him at the feather like feeling.
"So gorgeous." Kylo hummed, approving. His hand went from in between your breasts up to your neck. He wrapped his hand around you there. Not squeezing but just securely holding you in place. "How do you want it, baby? You tell daddy how you want him to fuck you."
You smiled softly at his words and at the safe feeling that was washing over you as he touched you. "I don't want to think about anything. I want to turn my brain off, I just want you."
Kylo nodded at that. He felt the same way. His hand moved from your neck up to your cheek, his thumb running over your lips as he continued to stare down at you. Droplets of water ran from his hair down his chest. He looked like a God.
"Stay here." He said to you with a hint of a smirk on his face.
You did as he said, watching him go back into the bathroom. Where else would you go?
When he came back out, you raised an eyebrow at him. He had his silk tie in his hand that he had previously discarded onto the floor when he got into the shower with you. It wasn't clicking right away but then when he nodded towards your headboard and said 'up', telling you to scoot up there, you realized what he was thinking.
You did as he said, eyes dancing excitedly. Kylo pulled at the towel that was underneath of you, tossing it into the open bathroom door. He then took your hands and put them above your head, able to hold both of your wrists in just one of his hands. He led them up to one of the poles of your headboard.
"I'm gonna tie your pretty little hands together and I want you to let me do what I want with you. Do you understand?" Kylo asked you and began doing as he described. He wrapped his tie around your wrists and the post of the bed, being so careful the entire time he did so. He grabbed your arms and pulled at them, seeing if you'd be able to break free easily. You couldn't.
You nodded at his question of understanding, squeezing your thighs together. You were going to argue that you really liked this tie on him and it was expensive, he was going to ruin it. But you knew he'd just laugh and say he could buy ten more of them. And besides, you weren't going to do anything that could possibly stop this from happening.
"Do you remember our word?" Kylo asked you, moving away so that he could take off the towel that had been wrapped around his hips, letting it fall to the ground.
Seeing him completely naked in front of you, still slightly wet from the shower and growing hard at the way he'd just tied you up, made you almost forget what he had even asked. But then you met his eyes and saw the expectant look he was giving you and you snapped out of it. "Red." You answered, assuring him.
"Good girl." He told you with a genuine smile. He moved on top of you, legs on either side of your thighs. His hand wrapped around your throat, touch gentle. "Tell me you love me." Kylo instructed you, chest rising and falling quickly just at the mention of it.
You couldn't stop the way you automatically grinned just to hear him say it. It would never get old. "I love you, Kylo." You said to him, skin heating up. Even though you knew the feelings were mutual, he was so guarded that it would always make you nervous to say it out loud.
Kylo sighed happily to hear you say it. His feelings were similar to yours. It would never get old hearing it come from you. He never knew he'd have someone love him like you did. "I love you too, princess." His grip tightened on your throat. "But I think I want to fuck you until you cry, okay? Will you let me do that?" His tone was so soft and sweet, his words were such a contrast.
You couldn't help but moan slightly, "Okay." You agreed, hands flexing in anticipation in the binds that they were currently in, looking up at him with wide eyes.
He bent down and pressed his lips to yours before he moved down your body, leaving kisses everywhere that he passed. When he got to your breasts, he paused and took a hardened nipple into his mouth, tongue running along the sensitive skin while his hand went to the other one.
"Your skin's so soft." He muttered, "And you smell so good. My perfect girl." He said this to you in between licks to your nipple, lips and teeth brushing against you there as well while his thumb ran over the other one teasingly.
You shivered at his touch and words and the way that his wet hair would leave occasional cold droplets onto your clean skin. "I'm yours." You reminded him. You moved your legs up to wrap around him, pulling him in closer to you.
At that, Kylo's hand came down to smack the outside of your thigh. "Put them down. I didn't tell you to touch me." He scolded you, tone disappointed. "You're lucky I'm too impatient to go get some rope and tie your legs apart too. Keep them spread open for me."
You loved when he got like this, especially when he was still so gentle like he was now. The combination of him being loving while also being stern was such a simple way to make your heart flutter.
You kept your legs apart as he said and he hummed in approval, pinching your nipple before continuing to move down your body. He placed kisses on your ribcage, the indent of your waist, down to your stomach and your hips. He only stopped when he reached the skin on the top of your thigh.
Kylo's hands gripped you there, spreading you even wider apart from him. You were helpless to his actions, tied up the way that you were and completely vulnerable to him. He ran his finger along your folds, using another to spread your lips apart, staring at how exposed you were. "So fucking pretty." He muttered.
His long middle finger ran along your entrance that was currently on display and he made a small 'tsk'ing noise under his breath. "But you aren't wet enough. Not yet. Let me fix that." And with that, you gasped in surprise as you watched him spit in between your parted legs.
"You like that?" He asked you with a cocky grin, noticing the way the noise that you made. "I just got you so clean and now you want to get dirty...I guess I shouldn't be surprised. No matter how many times I wash you, you'll always be a filthy little girl, isn't that right?" Kylo teased you before he spit again into your folds.
You moaned, biting your lip as you stared down at him.
He began distributing his saliva along your entrance and your clit, spitting one more time, getting you just wet as he wanted you. Then, he began rubbing slow circles over your clit, using his middle and ring finger to do so. "I'm going to do this until I can see that you're dripping for me. Do you understand? You can't tell me to stop, I decide when I do."
You could barely focus on his words because of the way that he was touching you and how amazing he looked while he put all of his attention on you.
Because you didn't respond out loud to him, Kylo smacked at your clit, a sharp difference from the gentle way he'd been touching you, sending a shockwave of pain and arousal.
You gasped, hips bucking as you jumped in surprise. "I understand." You corrected yourself.
Kylo grunted in response to that, going back to the slow movements on your clit, dipping into your entrance just slightly so that he could get his fingers wet again. "I thought you might," He agreed with you, "Because you know daddy owns this pussy, don't you? Sometimes I let you take control when I'm feeling generous but at the end of the day, you belong to me. If I really wanted to I could tie you up for days and use you however I want and you couldn't do anything about it."
You whined at what he was saying, lifting your hips up from the bed just slightly so that you could get more contact from his touches.
"You'd probably like that though, wouldn't you?" Kylo chuckled in a taunting way, fingers speeding up just slightly. "Being daddy's little fucktoy. I'd do so many dirty things with you, princess. I'd use your body for hours and just leave you tied up when I was finished. You'd live to please me. Does that turn you on?"
"Yes, oh my god." Your hands clenched in their restraint, feeling your muscles start to pleasantly tighten at the way he was pleasuring you. You couldn't do much dirty talking back to him because this was a lot for you.
Kylo didn't mind. He liked doing the talking.
"If you disobeyed me, I'd punish you by getting your toy out. I'd turn it on and leave you there for hours with that thing vibrating against you...You'd be such a fucking mess." He moaned at the visual of it, "You'd probably still beg me for more though. Such a greedy slut."
You couldn't help it, the way he was speaking to you plus the way that his fingers were speeding up against you with each sentence, pushed you to your edge. You let out a loud moan, hands squeezing into fists as your orgasm took over your body.
"Look at you," Kylo purred, watching you. You looked so perfect when you came. "Cumming without my permission. What got into you, hm? Maybe I should punish you, you seemed to like the idea of that." He was speaking to you but you could barely hear him as you came down from your high, ears ringing.
Vaguely, you could tell that Kylo was getting off of the bed and into your nightstand drawer where you kept what he was looking for. As he joined you back on the bed you could see that he had your vibrator in his hand, pressing the button so that you could hear the buzz of it.
Without any warning, he pressed it right against your clit, making you yelp in surprise. You were still so sensitive from just finishing, the vibrations of the toy were painful. "Kylo, stop. Not yet." You begged him, trying to catch your breath.
Kylo locked eyes with you, eyebrows raised. He knew that you knew what word to say if you actually wanted him to stop, that's why he reminded you of it before the two of you began. "I told you, you can't tell me to stop. I own this pussy and I'm going to do what I want with it." He said in a calm, almost bored, voice, holding your toy in place.
You moved your hips in a vain attempt to get some of the pressure away but to no avail, Kylo's hand followed you each time you moved. It did hurt and in a way, you did want him to stop. But you were fully aware that if you wanted this to end you just needed to say 'red' and right now, you didn't want that.
Your hands tugged at the expensive tie that was knotted around them, letting out moans and whines at the feeling. "Kylo, please. It hurts." You said to him, biting your lip.
Your helplessness made him moan and you could've sworn that you felt him press the vibrator even closer against you. "I know it does, princess. Daddy hates hurting you but you have to learn your lesson."
You gasped, feeling the familiar feeling of another orgasm starting to form in your body. You didn't think it was possible but somewhere in the uncomfortable pain that you were feeling, there was a rush of pleasure, a perfect combination of both. "I'm gonna cum again." You told him in a rushed tone.
"Of course you are." Kylo teased you, "You can't help yourself. Go ahead, cum for me." He instructed you. He was watching you so carefully, pupils dilated. He was painfully hard himself, precum leaking down the side of his length as he took in the way you were reacting. He refused to touch himself though, wanting to focus everything on you.
Surprisingly enough, you did orgasm. It was extremely powerful, the relieving feeling of it mixed with the discomfort of it. You weren't even aware of the way that you were practically yelling with how loud you were moaning, back arched high from the mattress.
But, as your heightened pleasure subsided, you groaned in discomfort at the realization. Kylo was still holding the toy against your clit at the same high speed that it had been at before.
"Good job, princess, but I'm not done with you. You're going to cum again for me and I don't care how much it hurts." Kylo said to you, holding the buzzing against you steadily, not faltering even when you were done cumming.
"I can't." You whimpered, hands tugging at the tie, "Please." You added, not afraid to start begging because of how much torture this was putting you through.
"It's not up to you." He reminded you, "I own you and I want you to cum again. You will cum again."
You winced in pain, this was becoming too much for you. You tried to fight through it, wondering if the pleasure would come through again but it was unbearable. "Kylo, no." You said to him, cursing under your breath. "Red." You said to him quickly.
Kylo paused when he heard that. The first time he'd ever heard you say it. "Red?" He asked you, making sure.
You nodded, "Yes, fuck. Red. Please." You pleaded with him, bringing your knees up from the bed in an attempt to push him away.
Kylo quickly turned off the vibrator and tossed it aside on the mattress, moving down closer to you. "Okay, it's over. We're done." He told you gently. He suddenly felt guilty that he went too far without meaning to.
He moved so that his hands could go to the tie that was around your wrists, wanting to take care of you.
"No." You stopped him, out of breath. "Keep them on." You requested, staring up at him. "I want you to fuck me, please. I just can't handle cumming again."
Kylo paused, eyebrows raised in surprise. He wasn't expecting that. "You do?" He asked you, searching your expression to make sure that you really meant it.
"Yes." You said to him, blinking up at him. He began wiping away a few stray tears that escaped your eyes when you finished as intensely as you had. "Don't you wanna fuck me, daddy? You got me so wet and ready for you...I'm dripping just like you wanted me to be." You said to him in a breathy voice, desperate for it.
Kylo growled under his breath, eyes fluttering as he heard you say that. Clearly, you wanted him still. He moved on top of you, hastily spreading your thighs apart to where he had been when he was touching you. "Let me see." He muttered, staring down in between your legs. "Look at that. You're right. You're fucking soaked, baby. You just came so hard but you still want me to fuck this filthy pussy? You're such a slut, I love it."
Kylo ran his fingers over your wetness so that he was able to collect some of it on his fingers. He spit on the same hand, mixing your juices with his own spit before rubbing that hand over his cock, getting it wet. Then, before he could taunt you anymore, he abruptly thrusted inside of you.
You two locked eyes, both letting out an almost animalistic moan at the feeling of it.
He put his hands on the headboard, above where you were tied to, using it was leverage as he began rocking his hips, moving in and out of you at a feverish pace.
You were so relaxed and exhausted, you lost track of time. In reality, Kylo fucked you like this for almost half an hour. Neither of you said anything, there was no teasing or dirty talk. It was all about feeling. Just moaning and eye contact.
Even in your haze, you couldn't help but notice how fucking gorgeous he was right now. Naked, with his damp hair pushed back from his face. He had a scar on his abdomen now, from where he'd been shot recently. You knew he was self conscious about it around you but you loved it, it was a reminder of how dangerous he was.
Funnily enough, Kylo was having similar thoughts about you. About how beautiful you looked underneath him, skin on fire and slightly sweaty from the exertion he put you through. Watery, wide eyes staring up at him in affection. He was so in love with you.
"I love you." You said, not even meaning to, reading his mind. You just had to say it, it was all that you could think about.
Kylo moaned at that, more of a whine than a groan. His hands tightened on the headboard and his thrusts became quicker. "I love you too. I love you so fucking much." He said breathlessly, keeping his eyes locked on yours.
Tears pricked your eyes again. This time not from frustration because of Hux or from the pain of being too sensitive. But from how deep you felt for Kylo. You were so thankful you had him. It was overwhelming.
Kylo saw that you were getting emotional and he felt his heart soar for you. He felt it too. "You want me to cum inside of you? You're mine, I wanna show you, I wanna claim you." He was rambling, his hips thrusting into you wildly.
"Please, Kylo. Cum for me." You pleaded with him. As much as you liked the feeling of your hands being restrained, you wished that you could touch him right now. You wanted to run your hands over his chest and his shoulders, play with his hair while he came.
But you didn't want to interrupt him, you didn't want him to stop feeling the ecstasy that he currently was. He made you feel so good earlier, it was only fair.
Kylo stared down at the tears leaking from your eyes and the way that you were begging him and he couldn't help himself. Thrusting a few more times inside of you, he gripped the metal of your headboard and moaned loudly, feeling himself cum inside of you.
You watched him finish, unable to stop the feeling of admiration that you had for him, a lazy smile on your face.
After taking a few deep breaths to recover, Kylo leaned down and began untying your wrists. He rubbed at the painful skin while he pulled out from you and settled next to you on the bed, keeping his hold on your hands.
The act that he put on during sex was gone. He was no longer sinister or unrelenting. He was the man you were in love with.
"Are you alright?" He asked you, cautiously putting an arm under you and pulling you close to his chest. He hated thinking that he'd gone too far, especially after everything that you two had been through that night.
"I'm alright. I loved it." You answered him, putting a hand on his chest and your head near it. You could hear how quickly his heart was beating and you were sure that yours was moving at the same pace.
You two laid there in silence as you recovered, comfortable. You were both exhausted but glowing. He kept kissing your wrists, rubbing them, alleviating some of the discomfort you felt from having them tied up for so long.
"We might need to take another shower." Kylo said to you, smirking.
Then, the two of you began laughing, his arm tightening around you and pulling you in closer.
As frustrated as you were, you knew the truth: If you had to, you'd wait forever to be with Kylo.