Mid-October
It has been another month of me falling for Eli, and fast. Between both our jobs and classes, Eli and I have only grown closer. The last month has felt like two years in my lifetime.
Eli asked me to be his girlfriend only a week ago, not only was I shocked but I was hesitant. We were studying for our Creative Writing midterm in my dorm when he had asked me. It was perfect, both sitting on my bed close to one another, listening to music through his headphones. I didn't expect any fancy way of asking me or any big ordeal to come from Eli, it wasn't the type of people we were. It was just the right amount of perfect.
Louise seemed to be thrilled for me, still assuming it was all her doing. She has been seeing someone she met from the app too, although she's confessed to me that he can barely hold a conversation. For Louise, that probably won't last long. As for me, I deleted the app the minute Eli took us on our second date. I already knew I wasn't going to need it again.
I was still in disbelief that Eli had possessed feelings for me. I seem to frequently question every good thing that starts to happen to me, specifically Eli saying he wants to be with me. I'm trying to actively work on that, making sure I accept what's happening and not to overthink so much. Overthinking was probably my biggest flaw.
Going over to Eli's house hasn't been as annoying as I thought it might be. The few more times I went over there was usually a party, but Eli and I kept to ourselves up in his room, where I wanted to be the most. Louise often went to the frat parties, so it was extra nice to know we were in the same place for once other than our dorm room.
Eli introduced me to more of his "frat brothers," if that's what you even called them. Some of them were cute, but definitely more Louise's type than mine. It was weird to have Eli introduce me as his girlfriend now instead of just Embry.
I only really had Louise and Eli has friends at this school so far, *maybe* you count Riley here and there. It was still so different than going to high school in Walsh, where I was friends with virtually everyone. I didn't really have anyone else to introduce Eli to as my "boyfriend." But I did't mind it as much as I thought I would.
This was the first boyfriend I have had since Danny, not to mention the only other boyfriend I've ever had. I almost said no to being his girlfriend out of pure fear on being cheated on again. But I knew Eli was different - different from Danny, at least. In the midst of Eli and I making things official, I decided to finally text Danny after weeks of continuing to push it off. We agreed on talking soon when our schedules aligned, I was still busy working at the library and trying to keep up with school. Danny was far from letting up on the situation, continuing to bother Louise about it when he got the chance. I quickly came to realize that there was no point in avoiding it any longer. Even though it was my past, it was my present now.
I had yet to tell Eli about Danny, and I didn't plan on telling him any time soon. Even if that meant things blowing up down the line, I didn't want things blowing up now. Things were still so new with Eli and I that the last thing I wanted to do was jeopardize the good thing we had going. Even though Eli probably wouldn't even bat an eye, I didn't want the chance to be taken any time soon. Come to think of it, Danny didn't know about Eli either. But did he even deserve to?
I currently sat at the university's library attempting to get some sort of work done. My mind continued to juggle both Eli and Danny, as it typically did, but I tried to focus on my computer in front of me. The competition that Professor Sutton had nominated me for has still yet to find its way into my brain. She had emailed me asking for a progress update and I had nothing to give her in return. The deadline was almost just under a month away, which gave me nothing but anxiety and doubt on my ability to write in general. Inspiration seemed to be far from me and I was anxiously awaiting its arrival, if it was ever going to arrive.
I attempted to start working on another assignment for the time being, utilizing my time for something I knew would get done. I waiting for Eli to show up, texting me he wanted to get some work done too. I was thankful he didn't have work today. All I wanted to do was spend as much time with him as I possibly could, even if I did sound like one of those "clingy" girlfriends.
The library was pretty packed, students seemed to be at every table and every computer station. Luckily for me, my spot was tucked away in the corner near the vending machines. I definitely, subconsciously picked this spot so the snacks were in easy access.
Eli eventually walked towards me with two Dunkin' coffees in each hand, smiling at me like he did the first time we hung out here. Because the weather was getting colder, Eli's new staple piece was wearing a flannel over a hoodie. I always thought he looked his cutest when he did that, although he could wear a paper bag and I'd still think he'd look good.
"Hi beautiful," Eli said while placing the cups on the table. I cringed every time he called me that, not because I thought he was embarrassing, but because I haven't had a boy call me that in so long. I'm not even sure if Danny ever called me that word. Or if he did, it wasn't that often.
"Hi," I said blushing.
"You didn't think I'd come without bearing gifts, did you?" He pushed the cup towards me, reading pumpkin spice on the side.
"Ugh, thank you." Lord knows I needed it. Eli sat down, leaning across the table to give me a kiss. It still felt weird to kiss him in public, but I was getting more than used to it.
"Whatcha working on?" He asked.
"Some random assignment for my psych class. Avoiding my short story," I admitted.
"No ideas yet?"
"Nope, I'm hoping they arrive this week." I ran my fingers through my hair with frustration.
"It will eventually come to you, I promise," Eli replied. I gave him a smile, holding his hand across from me.
"I was thinking, maybe we could do something fun tonight," I asked. Although I should probably use tonight to focus on my work and maybe attempt to start my story, spending time with Eli was how my last few weeks were going. And I didn't want it to change any time soon.
"What were you thinking?"
"I don't know...maybe a movie or something?" I suggested. I probably should have planned it out better before asking.
"There's that drive-in movie place? They're playing halloween movies, maybe we can see one of those?" Could be fun, I thought. I don't think I have ever been to the drive-in theater before.
"Sure," I replied. "It's a date." Halloween was one of my favorite holidays, so watching a Halloween movie with Eli sounded more ideal than a lazy night in the dorm.
"Good." Eli smiled again, rubbing my hand with his thumb. We eventually decided to focus and try to get some of work done. My pumpkin spiced coffee was giving me the slightest motivation in completing my homework in addition to my Spotify playlist in the background. I watched Eli as his eyebrows scrunched at his computer screen, trying to figure out whatever he was focused on. I couldn't help it, but watching Eli do anything was pleasing to me. My eyes wandered from his hair to his eyes, admiring his glasses that complimented his face. It didn't take him long to look up and see me staring at him, which I wouldn't blame him if he thought it was creepy.
About forty-five minutes went by of the two of us doing work, occasionally stoping to interrupt the other and show them something funny from Twitter. It was nearing lunch time, and instead of leaving to go get a meal I figured what better way to substitute a full meal for a bag of chips. Luckily, I was right next to the vending machine.
"Want anything?" I asked.
"Surprise me."
I got up and headed over towards the machine, hoping there'd be something to satisfy me for the time being. I could feel a guy standing behind me, either waiting to get to the vending machine or to talk to me. He was definitely lingering.
I turn around to see Danny standing next to me. My mouth almost dropped open from confusion. How the hell did he know where I was?
"Danny? What are you doing here?" At this point, it felt like Danny was stalking me, and not in a joking manner.
"Hey Embry," he said. Danny stood there tall with both hands in his pocket. He looked back at me with a sense of uncertainty, almost as if he didn't expect to see me here either.
"Again, what are you doing here? How'd did you know I was gonna be here." I watched Eli out of the corner of my eye, hoping he didn't see me talking to Danny. "I didn't text you we were gonna meet today."
"I know. And, I didn't know you we're going to be here." I looked at Danny with an even more pressed look of confusion. Why was Danny at WPU?
"I'm confused. Does Louise know you're here?"
"She should, my classes are on Thursday's."
Classes?
Eli began walking over, either seeing my expression that read "please save me" or wanted to be introduced. He made his way over to us, sticking out his hand towards Danny. The two of them patted each others backs, almost as if they already knew each other. I am so confused.
"Hey man, what's up?" Eli asked Danny.
"Hey dude, not much. Just trying to get a head start on the calc homework."
"I haven't even attempted it yet," Eli replied. "How do you two know each other?" He pointed to Danny and I. I gave him a dazed look back in response. Did these two already know each other?
I itched my head out of confusion, still trying to understand the situation I now found myself in. "Danny, he's my ex-" I cut myself off, almost about to say the word "ex-boyfriend." This can of worms wasn't about to unfold in the library in front of all these people. I still didn't know when I was going to tell Eli about Danny, praying that he somehow didn't already know. "An old friend. We went to high school together."
Danny looked back at me hurt and confused himself. I didn't know what else to say. Technically, saying he was a friend from high school wasn't a lie.
"Yeah," Danny said hesitantly. "I'm actually Louise's brother."
"Oh wow, I had know idea," Eli said.
"How do you two know each other?" I asked, more than interested in knowing the answer to this.
"We have calc together, we were together this morning actually," Eli replied. This is not how I expected these two to meet, if ever. How and why was this happening.
"Oh, okay," I said, forcing a smile to Eli. I had a million questions, for starters, did Danny go to school here now? Why wouldn't Louise have told me this?
"And how do you guys know each other?" Danny asked Eli and I. This all felt like awkward introductions that I had no intentions of making.
"We're actually dating," Eli responded, putting his arm around me. I smiled weirdly at Danny, unsure what expression was lying on his face. His eyes seemed wider and filled with desperation. Now knowing that Eli and I were together, Danny definitely wanted to talk to me now more than ever.
"Oh cool, Em didn't tell me she had a new guy in her life," Danny responded sarcastically, almost glaring at me.
"Eli, would you mind if we caught up for a minute? I haven't seen Danny in forever," I lied. I needed Eli to leave the vicinity so I could grill Danny on what he was doing here.
"Sure thing, I'll be at the table. Nice to see you man, I'll see you next week," Eli said. As soon as Eli was back in his seat, I pulled Danny aside farther away.
"You go here now?"
"Yeah, I wanted to take a few courses for now until I find out for sure what I want to do," Danny replied.
"When did you start?"
"About two weeks ago or so, it was a last minute decision." A last minute decision? Louise couldn't tell me about this?
"I mean, it would have been nice to have a little warning from you or Louise."
"I'm sorry Em. I didn't want to tell you cause I knew you'd react like this."
"Having you show up in my dorm room unannounced and then causally running into you at my schools library is a bit confusing don't you think? It would have been nice to know."
"I'm sorry, really," Danny said. I looked back at him still confused. Agreeing to talk to Danny was one thing, but having him at my school now was another. It made sense why Danny would choose WPU. It was close, inexpensive for instate, and Louise goes here...and so do I. But I couldn't help but ask myself; he couldn't have chosen any other school?
"Look, I don't mind you going here," I may have lied only a little. "It just would have been better if you told me, that's all."
"Well you didn't tell me you have a new boyfriend."
"And that's something I have to tell you?"
"Like you said, it would have been nice to know."
"Danny, these are two different things. I didn't ask for you to cheat on me, so why do I have to tell you when I get a new boyfriend?" I made sure to keep my voice lowered, hoping Eli couldn't hear our conversation.
Danny looked back at me with a pause, waiting for me to say something else. "Did you tell him about us?" He asked.
"There's no 'us,'" I replied. "Everything that happened is in the past. Eli doesn't deserve to be dragged into that."
"So you're really not going to tell your current boyfriend about me, who already knows me," Danny asked fiercely.
"Look, I don't want to talk about this here. I agreed to meet you but not like this." This whole thing made me want to talk to Danny even less. It was giving me a headache.
"Okay," Danny responded to my surprise. "Then when? When can we talk this through...I still have feelings for you, Embry."
Feelings. This is not what I needed, especially now. I didn't want Danny to have feelings for me because I had none left to give him. That I was certain of, at least I hoped.
I haven't thought of Danny in a romantic way since before we broke up. I couldn't look at him the same anymore.
"Danny, you can't say that," I said. "It's only gonna make things worse. I'm dating Eli now."
"Just let me talk to you and we can work this out." There was nothing to work out. I wasn't ever going to go back to Danny. I couldn't?
"I'll text you later, okay? We can talk tomorrow." I wanted this situation to end quickly and quietly, hence my decision to talk to him tomorrow. He was always for tomorrow's problems.
"Thank you," he said. My mind was still spinning, particularly with a million questions for Louise. Why the hell did she keep this from me? And why did Danny have to say he has feelings for me? Now, this is all my mind was going to be able to think about.
I made my way back to Eli, still feeling confused as I was standing over there. Sitting back in my seat, I debated on texting Louise and screaming at her over text. A part of me wanted to text her WHAT THE HELL in all caps, but I decided against it and wanted to wait till I saw her back in the dorm. I stared at my blank computer screen, tapping my pen up and down on the table.
"You ok?" Eli asked.
"Yeah, I'm good." It seemed that my new start I wanted so badly was turning in the opposite direction, back where it came from.
***
Eli and I spent another hour at the library, attempting to finish our homework. We agreed to meet later for our date which I was more than excited for. With Danny closer in my life, both mentally and physically, I was looking forward to the distraction. As for Louise, I hurried back to my dorm hoping she would be there. If I were in Louise's shoes, I would have told me about Danny.
Thankfully, Louise was sitting on her bed watching t.v. as I entered the dorm. I put my stuff down next to my desk, hoping to stall a few more seconds as I could before confronting her. I wasn't mad at Louise, or even Danny for that matter. I just needed clarification for the sake of my sanity, and what to expect for the rest of the semester now that Danny was lingering nearby.
"Hey, how was the library?" Louise asked.
"It was good, I got a bit of work done," I lied. My concentration was anywhere but on my homework.
"I probably should have gone with you guys, I've been avoiding my homework since Tuesday."
"You can come with us next time," I suggested. "Louise, can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, what's up?"
"Does...Danny go to school here now?" I decided there was no better time to ask than just blurting it out. I wanted to see how she would respond, and also confess that I ran into Danny.
Louise looked back at me with a blank expression, either debating whether to tell me the truth or come up with some sort of excuse in not knowing. Although her case didn't look good, he was her brother after all.
"I just ran into him at the library...and so did Eli," I added.
"I've been meaning to tell you," Louise finally said. "I was honestly scared how you were gonna take it. I know you hate him."
"I don't hate him, Louise."
"Dislike him, whatever, same thing."
"Why didn't you tell me? I rather you had told me than running into him unexpectedly and assuming he's following me around like a stalker," I said. It's not like I could change Danny being here, and it was something I was going to have to accept rather than continue to freak over. I just wish my best friend acted like one.
"I'm sorry, Em. I knew you were gonna talk to him soon, so I'd figured he would just tell you on his own." I guess Louise did have a point. But for some reason, I was still upset in her not giving me some sort of warning. I mean, we told each other practically everything.
"I get that, but you couldn't have given me a heads up? We're best friends, not to mention roommates."
"I don't know Em, maybe I should have."
"Danny's my ex-boyfriend who cheated on me and showed up in our dorm three weeks ago, he's not really someone I want to run into on campus every other day," I added. "Oh, and Eli and Danny know each other. Which is exactly what I needed when coming here." I was sort of rambling and couldn't stop, I did't meant to load it all on Louise. I guess I was just angry at the fact that my relationships, new or old, had some sort of turmoil. What was I doing wrong?
"Well, it's difficult to tell you things when I never see you," Louise replied.
"What?"
"You're always with Eli, we never hang out anymore." Louise couldn't possibly be jealous of Eli and I. I mean, it was her plan for me to meet someone to forget about Danny. How could she forget that?
"Aren't you the one who wanted me to download the app in the first place? To move on from Danny? That was you who wanted me to put myself out there."
"I didn't think you'd forget about me in the process," Louise said, fidgeting with her blanket. She didn't look up at me, leaving me more than confused. Louise and I were always the type to do our own thing, that was our friendship. Not to mention the parties she's always going to and hanging out with Riley.
"What about all the frat parties you go to? You're always going out, I'm not the only one who's not here."
"I'm not the one who's choosing their boyfriend over their best friend," she said.
"Who's doing that, because it's certainly not me! You're the one who wanted to me to get a boyfriend, to move on, remember? How am I getting yelled at when this is what you wanted for me?" Louise was quiet, non responsive. I sat on my bed waiting for an answer but got nothing. I was left more confused now than I was when at the library. Was Louise actually this upset?
"Look, Louise. All I wanted was just to know why you didn't tell me abut Danny, that's all. I didn't mean to start this whole thing, or whatever's happening here." With Louise, it was easier to surrender than keep the argument going. It was hopeful that by the morning, she would forget what we even fought about. "I'm sorry."
"You can't change that he's here."
"And I'm not trying to," I said. "Whatever, anything I say isn't helping." I gave up going back and forth with her, understanding that I wouldn't say anything to make things better. At this point, I definitely wasn't going to tell Louise about my date with Eli tonight. I planned on making up some excuse. I was even more looking forward to see Eli now after all of this.
"Just try and get along with Danny. For all our sakes," Louise said, grabbing her I.D. card and leaving the room. I let out an exasperated sigh, still confused at this whole conversation. Was I the only one who remembered that Danny cheated on me? I felt alone in this whole process, still circling the idea on how to make this entire situation disappear.
As for Eli, maybe I was spending more time with him than I was Louise, but that was both me and Louise's fault. I hated to admitted it, but it felt like ever since my date with Eli things had been plummeting around me.
I decided to go to Eli's house before our date. Although it probably wasn't helping the situation, I didn't want to see Louise. The problems I were avoiding were stupid, and definitely shouldn't be avoided for too long. But in the moment, I didn't care. I just knew that seeing Eli would make me feel different.
For once, there was no frat party to be happening, which I was extremely thankful for. Eli greeted me this his typical warm smile, wearing a sweatshirt with sweatpants and a book in one hand. Beanies seemed to be his new thing, which I definitely wasn't going to complain about. Something about him today looked extra comforting and normal, and Lord knows I needed normal.
He hugged me tight, standing for a few extra seconds than normal. I secretly loved how tall Eli was, making it perfect for me to rest my head underneath his chin. I didn't know why, but it was tiny things like this that made me fall for him even more.
We walked up to his room, exchanged a few hi's here and there to his roommates. I was glad that none of them lingered around for conversation.
Eli opened the door to his room, leading me in while holding his hand. I first noticed the few candles that were lit on his desk and dressers, alongside one of our favorite shows How I Met Your Mother playing on his tv in the background. There was a blanket on the floor with containers of Chinese food spread out along it, one of my favorite meals to have. I think I had only mentioned it to him once before.
"I thought we could eat before the movie," Eli said with a smile. My heart was gushing, as it typically did whenever I was with him. I looked around the room smiling like a little kid, planting a kiss on Eli's cheek.
"Thank you," I said looking up at him. "This is really nice." Eli somehow managed to always do the right thing, even if he didn't know it. We sat down on the blanket next to each other, looking back at one another in awe.
"I hope you don't mind, I kinda got one of everything on the menu," Eli said pointing to each dish. We both grabbed a pair of chopsticks and dived in almost immediately, I couldn't remember eating anything all day from today's earlier distractions.
The two of us sat there catching up with one another, not like we hadn't seen each other only a few hours before. We briefly discussed my short story for Professor Sutton, but I redirected the conversation quickly- I had still yet to come up with an idea. My mind was still caught thinking about Louise, unsatisfied with how we left things earlier. I couldn't quite understand why Louise was so upset with me, even though she never used the word "upset," it was clear within her words. I just wish she saw things from my point of view.
"You okay?" Eli asked. Although I tried not to be, it was clear I was distracted. Eli was supposed to help me forget, for the time being. But I decided maybe just saying it out loud now would help me get over it for the night.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied. "Louise and I sort of got into our first argument of the semester earlier today. I don't know if you'd even call it an argument, but whatever it was, I'm still thinking about. It didn't really get resolved."
"What was it about?"
I couldn't possibly tell Eli the extent of what Louise and I had argued about, at least not now.
"Just random girl stuff that you'd find silly," I responded. A horrible answer, but I didn't feel like dragging Eli into my drama with Danny.
"Are you sure? I don't mind listening." And this is why Eli was amazing, he didn't care how stupid the stuff going on in my life may be. He wanted to help. I just didn't want to ruin anything.
"No it's alright, just silly boy drama," I said, almost spilling the truth. "Louise's boy drama," I added for clarification.
"Are you sure you weren't shit talking me anywhere in there?" Eli said jokingly. I shook my head no laughing, yet feeling bad I wasn't telling Eli the truth.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Of course," Eli responded.
"Have you ever had a relationship? I mean, like one that meant something and lasted." Before I could even realize what I was saying, the question was already out of me. I was embarrassed the second realization hit me. Eli and I had never really discussed any past relationships before, and the last thing I wanted Eli to think was that I was an obsessive girlfriend.
I didn't even know why I was asking it. "I'm sorry, you don't even have to answer that. I don't know what I'm saying," I stumbled.
"It's okay, Embry," Eli reassured me with a laugh. I sat there eating my food to shut me up before I blurted any other embarrassing things. "I did, we dated for two years."
"What happened?"
"We dated throughout high school, and you know 'high school sweet hearts' never really last," Eli said. "We grew apart more than anything, both wanting different things. I was moving away to come here for school and we both agreed that long distance wasn't going to work out."
I nodded my head in agreement as I listened to Eli, still wondering why I had asked this question. I briefly debated mentioning Danny to get it out of the way sooner than later. "There was no cheating happening if that's why you ask," Eli interjected my thoughts.
"No, no, I didn't think there was," I responded. "I don't know why I asked, I guess I just haven't been in a relationship in awhile and I'm overthinking everything. The last thing I want to do is cause you to second guess things."
"Embry, why would you think I'd second guess things?"
"My last relationship didn't end well, and I like you too much for it to end the same way. I don't know if it was because I wasn't good enough or-"
"Stop," Eli interrupted. "What happened?"
"My boyfriend at the time cheated on me, which is always a great start," saying it out loud always made me feel pathetic. I tried to avoid "woe is me" conversations, but it was too late for that. "I don't want to mess this up - I just can't." It was crazy for me to be thinking all this, we had just started dating. Eli probably thinks I'm insane and blowing this all out of proportion.
"Embry, you didn't mess anything up. Your boyfriend did. You're not to blame," Eli said. "I wouldn't have asked you to be my girlfriend if I felt like this for someone else. I like you." His reassurance meant everything to me, and I hated being the type of person who needed it. "Is this what your argument with Louise was about? Is that why you're bringing this up?"
"No...kind of, maybe," I responded unsurely. I didn't know why Danny being back here made me so confused, but it did. I had yet to mention Danny was my ex, and I was more than thankful Eli didn't ask who my ex was.
"Whatever the case may be, just know Embry, I mean what I said. I really like you. Don't doubt yourself, please," Eli said. He placed his hand to my cheek, turning my head in his direction. I looked back at Eli feeling desperate, embarrassed and happy all at the same time. I was more than thankful that Eli hasn't run in the opposite direction just yet. And as for Danny, he was tomorrow's problem - like always.
***
We finished the rest of dinner laughing and watching t.v. I was really looking forward to the movie and so was Eli, just by judging the pounds of candy he bought at the convenient store on the way here. I offered to pay him for some of the candy or buy the popcorn, but again, he removed my card so fast out of my hand that he put it away in his own pocket.
The drive-in theater was only a fifteen minute drive from campus which was nice. The place seemed to be pretty packed yet Eli found a perfect spot in the middle of the field, directly in front of the screen. They were doing a showing of Scream which was one of my favorite Halloween classics. Eli had never seen it, which I bullied him for about ten minutes after he told me.
Eli eventually brought the two blankets and pillows from his trunk to the backseats of his jeep. We sat in the back of the car planning to look out the front windshield for the movie. We decided against opening the trunk and watching the movie that way, being it was one of the colder nights of October. Although we had the heater going, Eli gave me one of his sweatshirts he packed and tucked a blanket around my legs.
"Warm?" He asked next to me.
"Perfect."
I was more than content being back here, I wanted to be close to Eli. He wrapped his right arm around my shoulder and rubbed it up and down, handing me some candy before the movie began.
"I'm glad we're here," I said.
"Me too." Eli smiled gently. Looking back at him in this moment, my mind was completely consumed in Eli and him only. I blocked out Louise and Danny, saving my worrying for another time. All I wanted were for moments like this between Eli and I to last for days. I was finally beginning to feel completely, one hundred percent myself around him.
As we watched the movie, I secretly watched Eli's face and his reactions. I admired the way his face scrunched at different "scary" scenes. He eventually caught me staring, as he usually did, squeezing me harder each time.
"Quit staring at me Lincoln," Eli joked with his casual smile. I couldn't help it.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I turned my face back towards the screen, smiling as Eli was now the one staring.
"You're really beautiful, Embry." I looked back and matched Eli's eyes with mine. Every time he called me beautiful I didn't know how to react.
"Stop," I said blushing. I was wearing a hoodie, leggings, a ponytail, and was wrapped up in a blanket. It wasn't my best look to date.
"I mean it," Eli said laughing. "Really, you're beautiful." I could feel the nerves in the pit of my stomach. Although I had known Eli for more than just two weeks now, I still got nerves when I am with him - even after him asking me to be his girlfriend. The way he looked back at me I had forgotten everything else around me. It felt like Eli and I were the only two people in the entire drive-in. And that's how I knew this thing was becoming real.
His hand found itself on my cheek again, wrapping the rest of his fingers around the side of my neck. My pulse began to beat faster as I felt the energy between him and I. Eli moved his body closer to mine, moving sideways on the seats of his car. The feeling I had was strong, needing to kiss him. For the first time, I needed to be the one to press my lips into Eli's first.
I inched my body closer into his, pushing my lips against his as fast as I could. The warmth and salt of his lips stung my mouth, always feeling like the first time he had kissed me. Eli and I moved with one another, both with the urge to keep going. I wrapped both arms around his neck, tugging at the bottom of his hair, curls wrapped around my fingers.
We both pulled away from each other slightly, only for a second or two. The two of us looked at each other in the dark, smiling like we always did before pressing our lips back to on another. My stomach felt flipped upside down, unsure how I was this lucky to have someone make me feel this way. My heart beat faster as Eli brushed his hands down the sides of my stomach, clenching to both sides as we kissed. I could feel myself falling into Eli, completely trapped by his touch. As we continued to kiss, I could feel the pain on both sides of my cheeks from smiling.
I was beginning to feel an overwhelming sensation, one I hadn't had since I told Danny I loved him. But this feeling with Eli felt stronger, felt more urgent. The pressing thought sat in the back of my mind as Eli stayed close to me, both our pulses in time with one another.
Was I falling in love with Eli? The thought simmered in my mind, only making me feel more in tune with Eli as I thought about it.
I had forgotten the movie was even playing.