It had been an interesting year to say the least, you'd been through so many ups and downs it was hard to even remember where last year ended and this year began.
Losses, isolation and pain. As you sat at the dinner table thinking of your 3 words to sum up the year for your family they were the ones that sprang to mind. However, of course you couldn't share those.
The sparkle had been lost from your eyes months ago and as obvious your misery seemed to you no one else had noticed.
Well, no one except Conor. You'd met him during a particularly low point in life, a point that he'd been experiencing too, and since then he'd been the sole reason for a smile appearing on your face.
You loved him but you weren't sure you'd ever be brave enough to tell him. Losing him would surely be the moment in 2020 to send you spiraling into the lowest point you'd ever hit.
But watching him smile and not being able to kiss him and having to keep your distance while watching Netflix instead of cuddling up to him just kept getting more and more impossible for you.
Your admiration for the blue-eyed boy with the terrible jokes that you couldn't help but laugh at seemed to keep getting stronger every time you saw his name light up your screen or opened your door to see him stood there.
As you sat at the dinner table on Christmas day surrounded by your closest family you realised you still felt alone because the one person you wanted, needed even wasn't there to light up the room. And as you swirled the wine around in your nearly empty glass you decided you had to tell him that he was the only thought that occupied your mind, he was all you needed.
Love, adoration and hope. The 3 words that really mattered for your 2020.
...
I know its been FOREVER but I'm hopeful there's still someone out there who would like to see this. 2020 has been interesting for us all, so here's to a better 2021. Merry christmas!