During our time in the capital, Finnick and I have been sleeping together in the same bed. Maybe it's because of the horrific memories these rooms bring up for me, and the nightmares I have, maybe it's because our relationship was progressing, or maybe it's just because we like the comfort and the warmth the other one provides. Either way, waking up in his arms helps calm my nightmares, but nothing can calm the horrors of watching these tributes, and getting close with them. Today was the interviews, and the revelation of tribute scores. I just don't think I'll be able to get my heart up to hearing all about their lives back home, and all about their hopes and dreams, just to see all but one of them get killed.
I turned in to Finnick's shoulder, wrapping my arms tighter around him. "Hmm?" He rouses, his eyes opening, and his fingers going to comb through my hair that matted down to the pillow overnight as I slept.
"Oh nothing, I'm sorry to wake you. I was just thinking, today's the interview," I explain, my fingers tracing over his back nervously. I see him nod his head and push himself up in bed, extending his hand to pull me up too. As we sit up, the blankets still tucked around us and keeping us warm, he wraps his arms around me, holding me close to him.
"I'll be with you this time, sitting next to you in the audience. If you'd like, we can bring ear plugs, so you don't even have to hear about the tributes, but you can just see their dresses and suits," he suggests, his fingers running over my arm soothingly. I nod my head at him, looking up at him with a small smile on my face.
"Sounds like a perfect idea," I agree, leaning in to kiss him softly before getting up and out of bed. I might as well get back to my room and get dressed, so that I can go talk to at least Alberta before she has to get ready for the interview. I wave a quick goodbye to Finnick, who winks at me as I leave the room. A small blush spreads over my face along with my smile as I slip into my room unnoticed, and I begin to get ready for the day. I decide to put on on one of my more formal outfits, since we would be going to watch the interviews from the audience later, and I didn't want to seem unprepared or like I didn't care.
Plus, the fashion and the decorations were my favorite part of the capital. I might as well give in to them while I'm here, if I need to keep coming back every year.
After pulling the dark green cocktail dress over my hips and the rest of my body, I find myself unable to reach the zipper on the back that held it up. Exasperated and lacking a bra, I carefully left my room and knocked on Mags' door. She would not make me uncomfortable, like Cero, or want to have sex, like Finnick. She would just smile and zip my dress, then walk with me to lunch.
And that she did.
I took Mags' hand, helping her down the hallway and towards the table of food. She hasn't been talking as much as last year, perhaps the decapitation of Percy was hard on everyone, not just me. I force my mind to glaze over the thoughts of Percy, and look over at Mags, her wrinkled face smiling, as always. When we get to the table we find both tributes sitting with the world between them, and Velerio awkwardly trying to encourage conversation between them. Mags and I sit down across from Alberta, and succeed much better than Velerio did at talking to her.
"Alberta, what color do you think you're going to wear tonight?" I pick up an apple from the bowl on the table, inspecting it before taking a big bite, savoring the tart flavor. "And have you met your stylist, Burundi? She's absolutely wonderful,"
Alberta nods her head nervously, looking over her shoulder at Lorem, before leaning in close to us. Mags and I share a look, leaning across the table so Alberta can tell us whatever it is she doesn't trust Lorem hearing.
"I love her," she whispers with a small smile growing over her face. "She doesn't like men.." a small giggle escapes her lips before she looks down at her meal guiltily, as if she had forgotten she was going into a fight to the death. I understood that. Before I could say anything, Mags reached across the table and squeezed her hand softly.
"I know, that's what I love about her!" I beam, looking at Alberta's warm eyes. I feel someone's eyes on me, so I look over towards the inside of the table. I see Lorem looking at me, his light blue eyes staring daggers into my brain. I knew if I was the tribute this year, like Alberta, he would kill me the first chance he got. I can't be sure he won't sneak in to my room and kill me tonight, as I sleep. He was a viper. Cruel. Cold. Deadly. He was the sort of tribute the capital endorsed, not because they loved him, but because they trusted him, to bring back their betting money to their pockets. He wasn't a human, he was a machine, curated to win. And the capital knew it. And he knew it too.
"Hey, let's take some food on the go, and I'll walk you over to Burundi, alright?" I ask Alberta, taking my apple with me. Mags casts a sorrowful look at me, as if to ask why I'd leave her here with a deadly Lorem and an upset Velerio. As if hearing her silent pleas, Emilio and Finnick come out of their rooms, bickering about something or other that I wasn't entirely sure of. I knew that Emilio won a few years before Finnick, my guess would be about five or six, and I knew that now and then they got into small fights. Not brawls, with broken noses and upset stomachs, but brotherly ones, with joking pushes and hearty laughter. I waved goodbye to Finnick before ushering Alberta out of the tense room and into the privacy of the hallway.
"So Alberta, tell me about your training. About your life back home. Anything that could appeal to capital sponsors, people who would pay to support you in the games," I ask her, my hand still on the small of her back as I lead her to the elevator. I could feel the way she took deep breaths every now and then, as if she was forgetting to breathe, and then remembering all over again. It broke my heart to see such a small girl so upset over a cruel boy, over cruel games. But perhaps that's how the other mentors felt looking at me.
When Alberta looks back at me for confirmation, I realize for the first time that she had been talking, answering my questions. Crap. I did it again. I didn't listen, I just thought about my own stupid thoughts. Come on Annie. Now she probably thinks you're just like the other victors, someone who has no hope in her. I suck in a shaky breath, trying to control myself from getting upset in front of her. I simply nodded my head in affirmation to whatever she said, and hoped it wasn't some sort of self deprecating assertion. This time, while Alberta talks, I listen:
"Well, I think maybe the best thing for me to do is to act sweet, like you. I could answer their interview questions mostly about my twin brothers, who are just five, and what it's like to take care of them. I could talk about how I've always had a passion for music making, and I love to play rythyms on our dinner table, back before we had to sell it for some extra cash. I could talk about how I sing on the way to the fishery, and how if I win I'd love to pursue some sort of career as a musician," Alberta explains, her eyes looking off longingly. I nod my head in understanding, the first time I laid eyes on the capital, as a young girl, it inspired me as well. I just hoped this inspiration wasn't short lived, that it could carry her throughout the trials of the games, as long as she can make it.
As the elevator shoots down, I try my best to keep the conversation going, while avoiding any topic of the games that could cause me or her to go into distress. "So what are some of your favorite foods here?"
Thinking for a moment, Alberta taps her chin, before grinning up at me, the sparkling eyes and sea of freckles causing me to smile widely back at her. "Definitely all the different desserts. My family never had desserts back home, or really much food at all. So it's really fun to try all the different cookies and cakes and ice creams!" She exclaims, her mind no doubt wandering off to sweets instead of the uncomfortable morning with Lorem.
"Oh yeah," I agree, "I've had desserts back home, and now that I'm a victor I can get many of them, but it's just not the same as capital desserts! Have you ever tried the fudge brownie? We'll have to try them tonight, while they're displaying all the tribute scores."
Alberta nods her head, her mind glazing over the phrase 'tribute scores' that I threw in there, distracted by the opulence of capital food. Good, it's nice to know there's someone else here who loves a good meal. Some of the other victors stay so lean— 'watching their diet' they proclaim, but I just eat whatever appeals to me.
"Oh, and the corned beef!" Alberta sighs at the thought of it, then she looks up at me nervously. "I'm sorry Annie... I forgot, you don't eat meat..." she trails off, her hands nervously clasping together behind her back. It was as if she expected some sort of repercussions for her actions, some sort of yelling.
Instead, I merely put my hand on the small of her back, which startled her, for she was undoubtedly expecting something worse. "It's alright sweetie. I lived my whole life watching everyone around me eat meat, and it's the same at the tables here, and in the games. Hearing you talk about it is alright, don't worry." The elevator opens, and we walk out to the bottom floor.
"This is..." before I can finish my introduction, Burundi walks out of her room, her hair in a big bun on top of her head, and a large smile on her face. She embraces me quickly, her arms strong and protective, reminding me I had a friend in the midst of the monsters in the capital.
"You made it to my room," she says as we hug, and I feel her lift her arm, likely to wave at Alberta, who was standing there awkwardly, the freckles on her face standing out against her slightly red cheeks. "Now tell me, you looked darling on that chariot, but are you better at walking in heels than this one?" She points at me and laughs, which I knew was playful banter, but the look on Alberta's face that seemed to be asking me what I had to say proved she didn't get the joke.
"It's okay," I nod, encouraging her to answer Burundi in whichever way was true. "It's a joke, she's really sweet. She won't hurt you," I look over at Burundi for her confirmation, a way to assure Alberta that everything would be alright.
"Trust me, I won't hurt you. But maybe whichever sadistic, asshole did..." she trails off, taking Alberta with her into the styling room. She waves a nervous goodbye to me, and I make my way back upstairs and towards the stadium where the interviews will be held. Although I'm early, I already spot Finnick and Emilio helping Mags into a seat, and I slide in next to Finnick. Until the interviews begin we just sit in silence—our fingers interlocked, my head on his shoulder—appreciating the fact that we didn't have to talk to enjoy the moment together.
The interviews begun soon after, with the girl from one. Sparkle's sister, Shimmer. At this point she must be eighteen, a year older than her sister. Her hair sparkles just like her sisters did, and if I ignore the words she's speaking, I can almost imagine it's Sparkle up on that stage, getting a do-over, another shot at winning. So I press my fingers into my ears, blocking out the inquisitive voice of Caesar, no doubt asking her how she would honor her fallen sister in these games. It took everything in me not to fall apart right there in the audience, but I knew I had to keep it together, or I risked being deemed incompetent, losing my ability to mentor, and losing my money from the capital that helped maintain my family and helped us keep our monthly donations to the poor at home. I couldn't risk all of that just because I missed a friend I made in the games.
After she was finished, Finnick told me it's probably better that I didn't listen anyways, she was a lot more brutal and groomed to be a career than her sister was.
The consecutive districts pass by easily, where I mostly doze off, my eyes glazed over as I think of my family back home, relieved that I won't be going into the games this year, relieved that I'll be eating good food and spending time with Finnick instead of starving and running around the arena playing pretend. I don't realize quite how many tributes pass by until Finnick nudges me, pointing to Alberta up on stage. She was shaking next to Caesar, her hand threatening to drop the microphone, her knuckles white from grasping it so hard despite her shaking. I could tell his presence intimidated her just as much as Lorem's, or as any guys would. I try to catch her eyes, to convince her that it would be alright. I stare at her as hard as I possibly can, willing her to look at me, to make eye contact with me.
But her eyes stay trained to the floor.
She struggles through the interview, answering questions with "um, yes, I guess" or "I don't think so, no" or answers about how much she loves her mother. Right as her interview was ending, as I was losing hope for her, she mentions that she hopes to go home, so that her and her mother can sing together again. Good job Alberta. The audience "awes" collectively, and I know that she tugged at at least a few heartstrings with that last comment. Hopefully it'll be enough to get her through.
Hopefully.
Lorem comes into the stage next, his curly hair straightened and slicked back, which emphasizes his chiseled face and cruel eyes even more. The audience applauds him as he comes out, and I can almost feel him glaring at me, his evil eyes baring into my soul. He wasn't, for the record, staring at me, instead his eyes were trained on Caesar, answering his questions with short, hard answers that further solidified the thought in the audiences minds that he was a brutal man that was going to win these games.
I tried not to pay attention to him, or to any of the other interviews, and just wish this all away, to be back in our district four floor, watching the score results in Finnick's arms, with Alberta sitting next to me, and sitting far from everyone else. I think Finnick could tell I was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable by the mass amount of people in the audience, because he wrapped his arm around my shoulder, whispering in my ear that everything was going to be over soon. I tried to focus on his voice—soft, convincing, sweet—and not on the parade of tributes on stage, all claiming that they should, or will, be the victor of this years games.
Finally, the tributes begin to let out, and the audience follows suit, heading back up to our floor for dinner and the score results. I sit down beside Alberta, my hand rubbing her back softly. "You did a great job today, good job bringing up the music, I could tell the audience felt something" I assured her, a smile on my face, to try and convince her everything would be alright, even though she might die tomorrow morning.
I think Alberta was trying to ignore the fact too, because she simply nodded at my statement and continued to shove food down her throat, her fingers still shaking as she held the fork. Even though Lorem made me nervous too, I knew Alberta needed support much more than I needed it. I kept my hand on the small of her back while I ate with my other hand, which was relatively easy considering I was eating pasta with pink sauce, one of my favorite dishes that I had this time last year.
After dinner was finished, we sat in front of the T.V, watching who got what scores:
Sparkle, district one, 10.
Feroroch, district one, 10.
Elliera, district two, 10.
Hunter, district two, 8.
The district three tributes were forgettable, but I made sure to pay close attention to what Alberta and Lorem got.
Alberta, district four, 5.
Lorem, district four, 10.
Cero, Emilio and Trident all cheered for Lorem, embracing him in the belief that district four might have another victor this year. I turned instead to Alberta, giving her a tight hug and convincing her that she would do fine anyways, I got a low score and did just fine in the games.
As we were talking, Velerio pointed up at the screen with a confused look on his face. "Who is that?" He asks, pointing at the face of the girl Johanna Mason, from district seven. Although it was normal for people from the lower districts to get low scores, it wasn't usual for them to get scores this low. The later districts were seemingly less prepared, they were less fed, living in poverty, and typically living in conditions that hurt them more than helped them in the games, something that I recognized as I visited the districts during my tour.
But for as long as I can remember, I don't think anyone in the games has gotten a 3.
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hey guys!! how are you doing? im just editing up the chapters that i have currently, before i post write chapters about the actual games! i hope everyone likes the split POV, because it will give you guys the opportunity to see different sides of the games, and also two completely opposite people.
- hannah :)