If Only I Said I Love You

Chapter 1 - Fire

It was a cold summer evening. Another night of sleeping alone, Catherine thought. She tossed and turned on the large bed made just for her by her Arthur. He's going to be king and she's going to be queen soon, the marriage has been arranged.

Like a little girl, she giggled at the thought of the stolen kisses she's shared with him on the garden, on his bed, on the woods where he took her to watch him hunt, and on the highest tower where he kissed her under the stars. Though she may be older than him, she fancies the boy. What with his handsome face and his dashing demeanor, who wouldn't? When they first met, Katherine was as stiff as a stick. She would sit or talk in a graciously practiced manner that Henry can't even strike an intimate conversation with the girl.

But now, they've both grown and the fondness between each other also grew. The wedding will be in the next full moon and she can't hardly wait!

Katherine thought of the wedding bells, the beautiful gown she's going to wear, and oh the night after the wedding. She's been saving herself to be the perfect queen for him. Thoughts of Arthur filled Katherine's mind and soon she fell asleep.

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Someone is shaking her shoulders, hard. "Lady Catherine, wake up!" Dazed, Catherine woke up at the sight of her frightened handmaid. "What's wrong?" Catherine asks. "There's no time miss, we have to hurry!" her handmaid - what's her name again, ah Helen - took Catherine's hand and they dashed through the castle's secret passageways leading deep into the forest. They kept running. "Helen, what happened?" Catherine stopped for a moment to ask. "Fire, my lady. Someone tried to burn the chambers next to yours. Someone was trying to kill you."

"That's impossible. Arthur wouldn't let-"

"There!" both turned their heads to the one who yelled. A soldier. No. He's not alone, there must be at least six of them. It was too dark to count. "Leave the lamp, Helen. Run!"

And run they did, deeper and deeper into the forest, with Catherine behind. She's not used to running. Years of elegant strides and dancing, only to be rendered useless in situations like this! Lucky for both her and Helen, they blend well in the night for their small figures make them hard to be distinguished. But the soldiers are gaining speed. One threw his spear and almost had Katherine by the arm. Katherine quickened her pace, running with all her might. By the love of God, her legs are about to fall off. But this was replaced with terror as there is no sight of land ahead. They're about to reach a cliff. Just when Catherine started to panic, Helen spoke.

"Your majesty, I have a plan," Helen says as she took Catherine's hand and jumped to the steep slope. So it wasn't a cliff, Catherine thought as they rolled down down to God knows where. Thankfully, they both survived the fall. They're alive, but not for long. The soldiers followed them, rolling like logs with armors. Immediately, Catherine and Helen ran as far as they can with blistered feet.

They found a cave large enough to fit the two of them. Exhausted, the two women rest their backs against the wall. "Your Majesty, I want to apologize for my behavior. I should have told you that we're about to jump."

In a normal day, Catherine would've punished her with fifteen whips on her naked back. "Did you know it wasn't a cliff?" Catherine asks her handmaid.

The shadows of the night covered Helen's face, hiding her red cheeks, "A soldier happen to tell me, Your Majesty."

"Oh? And who might this soldier boy be?"

Helen didn't have the time to answer. They heard voices nearby. "They must be hiding in that cave," a man said.

Catherine and Helen were about to surrender themselves, seeing that it's the only option they have. But as Catherine looked behind, she saw a light from inside the cave. She tugged at Helen's dress and they both went deeper into the cave quietly. Once they reached where the light was coming from, they were stuck. Now what? Then a thought crossed Catherine's mind, "Helen, take off your clothes."

"Y-Your Majesty?"

"Let me wear your clothes and you'll wear mine," Catherine said. "That might work. They might confuse you for me but," she paused, "if they get their hands on you, they will kill you without hesitation."

Helen sighed, "It's my job to serve you, Your Majesty, even if it costs my life."

As soon as they finished exchanging clothes, Helen spoke, "Leave me here, Your Majesty. This cave might lead to somewhere if you go farther."

"But we can still go, Helen. Come with me."

Helen shook her head, "I can buy us some time, Your Majesty. Please, save yourself. The King Arthur will be looking for you soon. He will not stop until he's searched the ends of the earth for you."

They can hear men approaching. "Quickly!" Helen pushed Catherine, and she ran. Without looking back, she ran. Squeezing in small spaces, climbing over rocks until she reached the end.

It was a gaping hole waiting to swallow her whole.

Catherine doesn't know how deep it was. She can't turn back now. She can't go back, and yet she can't move forward either.

It's death by blade or death by rock or water I suppose, she thought.

She laughed, "I do hope to God that Arthur will find my body in this cave because I will never surrender myself."

Then she jumped into the hole, accepting defeat, accepting death.