Chocolate Covered Strawberries [Remus Lupin]

𝚝𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚢

Her eyebrows were knitted with worry as the last sentence settled deep in her mind. She was looking upon Remus who listened to everything she exposed to him. His expression was unreadable.

''I can't allow that. That's the reason why I started avoiding you. I'm sorry.'' She added, hoping any kind of reaction out of him.

First, he frowned, as his eyes scanned her. He knew deep inside him that everything she just said wasn't easy to do so. Then he remembered that Lily told him Jasmine must trust him if she discloses such things. A warm feeling appeared inside him at that thought but it disappeared when he noticed her expression. It was dreadful, doubtful, she was feeling like she made a mistake and he wanted to show her he was the most glad that she spoke to him.

Remus took a step closer to her and stopped mere inches in front of her. Then he extended his arms and circled them around her. He pulled her closer to him in a hug, savouring the nice aura surrounding her. Jasmine blinked a couple of times from shock. She slowly raised her own arms and put them around his neck. She proceeded to lay her head on his shoulder seeking comfort. It was an unexpected gesture but one she desperately needed. It told her everything he couldn't express with his own words but mostly it told her he was there for her.

His hand softly rand up and down her back while less and less space was left between them. ''I'm sorry,'' Remus said quietly while still embracing her.

She tightened her grip, silently showing him gratitude. When she breathed in his scent it felt oddly familiar and very homely. She couldn't quite place it except commenting it was enjoyable. Neither of them knew how much time passed until they both put some distance between them. Both with small smiles on their faces they couldn't look away.

''Thank you for telling me.'' He said softly.

Jasmine nodded slowly, backing up even more. She bumped with her foot at the box that was still placed on the floor. Only then did it strike her mind again why she originally came here. She already had the means to pick up the box and leave when Remus cleared his throat.

''But it doesn't have to be this way, does it?'' He asked slowly.

Jasmine scrunched up her eyebrows looking at him. She wondered if he missed the whole meaning of her little speech. He sure couldn't be that thick to not understand that they couldn't be friends anymore. ''What are you saying?''

He took a step closer eagerly with extended arms. ''I'm saying we can still talk after time during prefect patrols or somewhere no-one could see us. It can be our secret.''

Cautiously then Jasmine took a step backwards not registering on his words. Her face grimaced just thinking about it. She didn't know where he was coming from but she did note that she was talking to a Marauder. ''I don't know Remus. It's not such a good idea.'' Her tone was sad.

At that Remus' content expression dropped significantly. He could be pretty good at picking up some signs in that situation. ''Well, why not?''

''It's too risky.'' She answered immediately now with some edge to it.

She turned back to the box, indicating the conversation was over. Before anything further could happen she heard Remus near her again and she turned back to him with a questioning glance. His expression was full of desperation still not deciding to let her go.

''Is this it then? We never look at each other again from this point on?'' His voice raised a little during the inquiry.

Jasmine took another step backwards, a bit of fear striking her eyes. She gasped for air, which would help her word out her thoughts. ''N-no, I didn't mean-''

''Then what did you mean?'' Remus forcefully let out.

A bit too forcefully was his next thought when he heard himself how he sounded. Jasmine stared at him with wide eyes rooted to the ground. While he tried to calm his breathing, she kept completely still. He expected her to say something back in their heated conversation but she kept quiet. Jasmine proceeded to feel the frustrating burning feeling in her throat and somehow she couldn't speak. She didn't know what to answer, she didn't know what she wanted and how to feel. Remus slowly retaliated and also put some distance between them.

His look dropped to the ground and his voice calmed. ''If you wanted nothing to do with me anymore you wouldn't tell me your side of the story. So what exactly do you want?''

Jasmine's glance slowly travelled up and it finally settled on his face. She was as much conflicted as he was. While when he was searching for answers, she was just creating more questions as much inside her head as outside for him. Her hands were clasped tightly together, squeezing in frustration as her thoughts ran wild.

''I don't want it to end,'' Jasmine spoke calmly. They watched each other, waiting for any kind of reaction. It came slowly if it even came. An unwilling smile appeared on Remus' face but it was barely noticeable. ''But it's easier for you since your family relationships or your life is not on the line.'' Jasmine again closed herself up. She hugged her arms close around her torso and turned sideways.

Remus visibly slumped, his shoulders dropping as he continued to hear the doubt in her voice. His hands were buried in his pockets. His jaw was clenched the more he thought about possible outs of this situation.

''I get it that you're willing to risk it, you're courageous no doubt you are a Gryffindor. I'm not.'' Jasmine continued speaking in a sad tone. It was the last thing she wanted to say before she would leave out of the room. She didn't want to even think how pissed Head Girl would be when she returned since she took so much time to fetch one box of decorations.

''Maybe you're not. But you are a Hufflepuff. It means you're loyal.'' Jasmine's head turned to Remus who was already watching her. Despite anything, she says he still brings up the positive side of everything and he keeps on hoping everything will be fixed. She admired that in him.

He took a step backwards now finally preparing to leave. ''I'll see you around, yeah?'' He stopped for one more second and didn't really expect her to react.

And she didn't, she stood still and watched him as he slowly turned around and left the storage. When she picked up the box she suddenly halted in her step. Jasmine didn't really think through at what note they left their conversation and suddenly it made for a confusing feeling inside her. She still thought everything was too risky even though she wanted to talk to him and he left everything at an open point. His question was hopeful and almost like he wanted to guilt-trip her into agreeing with his idea. She shook her head free of any thoughts about it, she had enough for that day.

When she arrived back to the Great Hall as expected Head Girl was impatiently tapping her foot on the floor. The second she dropped off the decorations she joined at the table where others were still carving pumpkins. She refused to look at Lily, even though she knew the redhead was giving her a questioning glance. When she did look up she noticed the untouched pumpkin still at the same place Remus left it, without him in sight. Apparently, he decided to leave project Halloween altogether. Jasmine anxiously bit her lip as her mind again travelled back to his last sentence.

Was that an invitation or was it an ending sentence meaning they'll see each other in class and that's it? She internally groaned at the pounding feeling in her head before concentrating back on her pumpkin. 

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