A Part Of You..is Me.

Part 1

" Hey..wanna go for lunch together ? "
He ask me as usual..

" Yeah,let me pack my things first." I said as usual too..taking my time packing up stuff that were already orderly...

" Hey,wanna go on a date this weekend..?
I'll pay for the trip as usual. "
He says when he wanted to invite me out as usual too.

" Sure, I will pay for the meals. "
I follow up with that answer as always to not feel indebted to him for the expenses.

" How many years has it been since we were together..? " He would say every year..as if reminding me that it was time for him to say THAT sentence..

" Ohh,its been 5 years I guess ? " I say pretending not to care much incased he would feel bad for me or sense what I am feeling..

" Hmm..its been that long already..? "
He would reply as usual as if, he did not even think of anything..while saying it.

And then the usual silence follow up with us both engrossed in what we were doing..me with my book in hand and a cup of floral tea on the side table..Him with his phone in his hand..and the other holding the remote control to the telly.

" Closed the TV if you are not watching, " I would say as always..

Him not listening instead focusing on his phone as if he is possess by *who* ever is texting him..

In the end I would close the TV for him and went to bed..

While he will walk towards his room still tapping on his phone and shut the door..

While I was lying on my back on my bed..and yes in My room I start to wonder..when it all started..

This is also a normal thing for me to think about,even more so these last couple of years..I have been together with him..

I was the one who ask for separate rooms thats for sure,we both wanted our own work space.

I also like to have my own room because I have siblings in the past and we were always having to camp in 1 room the three of us every time my mom or dad moved to a new house.

Another question..or my dad and my mom divorce when I was 15 years old.
For me,it was not a big deal..so I did not cry or feel sad about it.

I actually felt happy for them because they won't fight anymore in secret or in front of us..but everyone cried except me which makes me feel empty..

2 years past..and he found me.We met through a mutual friend of mine and a classmate of his ,

She said he like me since the first year of highschool..and he always wanted to talk to me but was not brave enough..

I think what I felt at that time..was that he was cute..his personality. He was tall had short black hair he has oval eyes and he almost resemble a puppy his face and personality.

He was also popular in school thanks to his personality,his tall stature makes him good at sports and his academics were pretty good..

" I wonder why you like me..? " I ask him once when we were staring blankly in front of the TV cozying up together on the sofa..

" Hmm..I think there were many times that makes me fall for you.." he chuckle and smile warmly at me.

" But I guess..just like many of my friends..I fall for your nice personality and the cute face you have." He would say not feeling shy at all saying that..

In the past I would blush whenever he say that..but I got used to it now..for some reason..I don't feel anything when he say that anymore..

I roll off my bed to check my phone for the time..9 : 37 p.m. I change my outfit to a sweatpant and a crop hoodie to match my favourite theme black and white.

I put on my socks and sports shoes heading downstairs to warm up my body before going out to jog..as usual. I open the door to his room to tell him I was going out but he was fast asleep..

Atleast he pretended to be. I saw the light coming from under his duvet, I try to stay calm as always..I close the door to his room and went outside.

The night air was especially cold today..and the cold breeze was a pleasant kind of joy that makes me feel happy again.

I did a light jog as to enjoy the scenery it was especially breathtaking at night with the orangery light from the lamp post in each corner of the street..

The colourful decoration of light for each house as it was nearing the celebration season for the neighbourhood.

It was a normal occurance for each neighbourhood to held a gathering so that everyone can get to know each other and get along well.

I had not started to even think of decorating the house because..I did not think I would attend the event again this year,my schedule was full.

Also it was a share house , we both pay the rent together so since the house was under both of our name I did not think it was appropriate of me to do as I pleases.

As I was lost in my though.. I saw a guy who was shooting something in the open field in the middle of the neighbourhood.

The open field had a playground there for the kids,exercising equipment for the adults and open space that has not been touch yet with any hope for development.

I went closer to get a good glance at the same time catching my breath..when I saw he was doing archery.

The field was big enough for the space he needed to used and he had a small target board he brought along with enough arrows that are well taken care of.

The light from the lamp post provided a good amount of light to see well enough to not miss a shot..atleast from his eyes.

I could not even see where the target is..or where he is shooting. I was so surprised because the closer I get the more shots went straight for the middle of the board.

When he look at me..expressionless
I try to smile as best as I could.
" You are really talented! how can you see so well at night and aim right for the target ? "

I ask while trying to contain my excitement..I like archery I try it once when i was little with my dad and another time when I was at a highschool carnival of my friends school.

When he stare at me as if I am an annoyance..I smile awkwardly and try to leave..but he said..

" I practice alot..it depends on the arrow where it lands..but I try really hard to perfect it. " he said with a small curve of his mouth going upwards.

He is smiling right..? I though to myself.

" Yes and it seems really fun when you do it..you look happy. " I said based on the look he was giving while practicing.

This time He gave me a genuine smile
After a while he let me try a few turns with his bow and arrows..I felt really grateful for the chance he gave me.

" Thank you for letting me used your practice time abit to learn archery properly..although with this light I can barely shoot correctly. "

I laugh while saying that as I only got one or two shots hitting the board and the rest is a failure..

" It's fine..you did well even with this light." He said with a expressionless face again.

" Haha..if only that was true I would be glad though." I said already feeling sad I had to go.

As I was about to turn around to leave..he slipped a card in my hand.
I turn to face him again..but he turn my face the other way.

" Please go..it is not good for you to stay out too long..," he said while he let go of my face and packing his stuff.

I ran back home and did not look back..feeling the exhilarating rush traveling from my ears to my face..

" Why do I feel like this..? " I ask myself..as I went up to my room while I catch a glimpse the door to his room was left open and nobody was inside..?