𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑺𝑨𝑽𝑬𝑫 𝑴𝑬 // mileven

thirty

with a chorus of laughter, my parents finally finish their discussion, and turn to me, lingering smiles on their faces.

"ellie, finally!" my dad says, squinting at me as if he's unsure of what i even look like. "come here, we'll tell you all about the graduation we just came from!"

i stare blankly at them before forcing a smile across my lips, struggling to make myself seem happy to see them.
"sure." i mumble half-heartedly, trudging my feet as i reach them, my hand still clutching onto mike's.

"is this lucas?" my mom asks in confusion, her gaze moving right past me to land on mike.

i struggle to find the words to reply as i stare at the woman i call my mother, trying to find any sort of indication on her face that she's happy to see me, but she doesn't even acknowledge my presence, her eyes fixed on mike.

"oh, um no..." mike says, answering for me. he pulls a effortless smile onto his face and politely holds out a hand to my mother. "i'm mike."

"oh!" my mom says, grasping mike's hand in her own and giving him a firm handshake. "are you ellie's friend?"

mike opens his mouth to answer the question, but i watch as his voice catches in his throat, obviously unsure of how to reply. i step forward to fill his silence, stroking my thumb across the back of his hand as i make eye contact with my mother.

"no, my boyfriend." i say, hearing mike make a surprised noise from beside me. my heart beats rapidly as i watch him through my peripheral vision, noticing how the corners of his lips quirk upwards.
i mirror his smile as i repeat the words over and over again in my mind.

my boyfriend. my boyfriend. my boyfriend.

it feels so right to say, the word seeming so natural to me, and from mike's reaction, i can tell he likes it too.

"your boyfriend." my dad repeats with a frown. "i thought you were with.... oh, what's his name?" he looks at my mom in uncertainty and after a moment she finishes the sentence for him.

"troy!" she exclaims, snapping her fingers. "i thought you're dating troy?"

"yeah, um, we broke up almost two years ago." i say in reply, shifting my gaze to my feet as i take in the fact that they didn't even bother to remember that.

mike catches sigh of my obvious discomfort and he shifts his body closer to mine, gently bumping our arms together in a comforting gesture.

"really?" my mother says in a surprised tone, looking at her husband who mirrors her expression. "that's a shame, he seemed good for you."

"good for me?" i inquire, raising my head, a furrow embedded between my eyebrows.

"he was a good influence on you." my dad offers, continuing where my mom left off. "you were always so sad and depressed all the time, i'm glad he fixed that."

"and then you two returned me back to that." i mumble under my breath, barely loud enough for myself to hear. to my surprise, mike's ears catch my voice and he whips his head around to look at me, his eyes gleaming with worry.

i force my gaze away from mike's, feeling as though my knees are moments are from buckling under the weight of all three of their stares. a shuddering breath escapes my pursed lips and i give my parents only silence in reply, not being able to find the courage to keep speaking.