Lonely (a falsettos college AU)

Silk curtains and bedsheets

"Holy fucking shit Marv, I knew you were rich but not this rich!" Cordelia yelled as he toppled towards them.

Charlotte put her hand on her arm, reminding her that they were inside.

"Well, big house, but lonely all the time. Hey Whizzer."
"Hey Marv"

The air was filled with tension between the two, and even Charlotte and Cordelia noticed it, communicating via the secret lesbian brain meld code thing.

"So Marvin, I thought Trina and Mendel were coming?"

Marvin finally tore his eyes away from Whizzer, the passion still burning in his iris' only to be extinguished by the name of his girlfriend.

"Yeah, but they're coming down tomorrow. I'll show you all to your rooms."

They followed Marvin through the house, saying it was big was an understatement. It was the size of a stately home, gold embellishments adorning every corner. The floors were made of a marble that was impossible to walk quietly on, either their shoes would tap or squelch as they followed Marvin. It was difficult to keep up with him, every hall looked the same except for the different antiquities.

"Here's your room Charlotte-" he pointed to a room, then to the opposite one"- and this one is yours Cordelia! Whizzer, keep walking with me."

They continued to trek through the wings, very little conversation to be had between the two of them. They practically had not seen each other since Whizzer's 'confession' and he was clueless to it even happening, but Marvin still distanced himself, then the end of term came and they did not speak. He abruptly stopped outside his own bedroom, and Whizzer almost walked into him.

"Here's my room, you know, just in case, and yours is next to mine."

Marvin turned to go into his room, but Whizzer stopped him.

"Hey what's up, you've been acting really strange-" Whizzer took Marvin's shirt in his hands, slightly unbuttoning it, before putting his arms around his neck, draping them over his shoulders "- and you've been ignoring me."

Marvin looked up at him, the closeness making his breath shake with longing and nervousness.

"I just... you... you said..." he sighed and cupped Whizzers face gently, reaching up on his tiptoes to kiss him. Whizzer automatically kissed back, setting a slow gentle pace and traced small love hearts again on the back of Marvin's neck.

And then he remembered that night. Small moments of conversation coming back, memories he thought were lost, actions he remembered.

Baby, you know I love you.

"Oh hell naw, I'm gonna go find Charlotte."

He set off walking, making it about three metres before Marvin interjected in confusion.

"Wrong way."

That evening they decided against drinking, and instead the four unlikely lovers danced and sang, letting go of themselves just so they could feel like kids again. It was all fine until Whizzer suddenly felt nauseous, remembering his 'declaration of love' to Marvin and excused himself, sitting outside on a snow covered bench, watching the stars.

It was not long until Marvin followed him out, joining him on the bench, they sat in silence hearing the crack of far away wood in the Forrest and the giggles from inside.

"Why did you leave?"
"I felt sick."
"Why?"

Whizzer did not reply.

"Was it for the same reason I was ignoring you?"

"Yes." A new type of reluctancy enveloped his voice.
"It's because I know you won't ever like me the way I like you."

"Stop it"

Urgency flooded Marvin's voice.

"We shouldn't place this game anymore."
"We should. You and I are end game, we've played so long, you're gonna give up now?"
"You have Trina, this has already gone on way to long."

He got up to leave, tears building up in his eyes.

Suddenly in a fit of rage and panic, Marvin shoved Whizzer against the wall behind them, his fingers digging into Whizzers hips and kissed him aggressively, forcing his tongue into whizzers mouth as he struggled against him. Marvin used his knees to spread Whizzers thighs and his knees went weak as he began to kiss back with as much passion that Marvin displayed. He wove his hands through Marvin's hair pulling it as he felt the pleasure of the kiss. He broke the kiss to
Breathe.

"Don't ever try to get inside my head" Marvin snarled, for several beats they stayed pressed against the wall, marvin's grip on Whizzers neck choking him. He slowly retracted his hand, staring into Whizzers eyes, his striking eyes.

His laughter ringed in Marvin's ears, light and beautiful.

"You caught me, damn, I was so sure you'd break."
"Almost."
"Well you know what. Screw you!"

"Please"

He floated in and out of consciousness, noticing tiny things before going back to sleep. The light flooding through the open curtains, ebbing and flowing as they moved with the cold wind from the open balcony. He felt his collarbones pressed against his back, keeping him warm, and he smiled as he drifted off again.
"I won" the words were whispered like ocean waves, getting lost in the other sounds.
The sheets were soft, and he moved his palm out to feel them, reaching for the spot where whizzer had been, feeling it empty he opened his eyes, inhaling what was left of Whizzers scent. The sweet serenity of the morning making him feel at ease.

Marvin did not make his bed that morning, he could not get rid of the print of whizzers body on his bed, could not risk losing the scent of him on his pillows. Instead he got changed and went downstairs to the dining room, being met with Charlotte and Whizzer deep in conversation. He went to sit opposite whizzer but as he sat down, winced in pain, letting out a tiny yelp.

All eyes turned to him, Charlottes face of confusion and Whizzers smug look of success. Then Cordelia blazed into the room, grabbing a croissant and began to talk loudly to Marvin.

"You know I took you as more of a bottom."

Charlotte whispered to Whizzer, her nose and cheeks going slightly pink as she understood what had just happened.

"You know I'm so sick of being defined as a certain type of gay, I can be whomever I want."

"Oh my god, me too, if I want to have sex I'm just gonna go up to Cordelia and sit on her face, she can do the same thing if she wants to."

Whizzer nodded in agreement not entirely listening as he stared at Marvin, but upon hearing Cordelia's name his head snapped towards her.

"Wait, you mean... you guys..."
"Cordelia and I are together."
"I'm so happy for you two!"

Whizzer engulfed her in a hug, smiling at the happiness she deserved but knew he'd never have for himself.