Vanished [Unedited]

Chapter 1

“...And just like that, she was gone. I guess she was losing it slowly with everything going on, but I never thought she’d leave. I tried telling her it was going to be okay and she usually believed me but, the thing about Cubby is you couldn’t leave her alone with that little head of hers for too long. Although the trip seemed like a good idea, I knew her being without us would only result in her reminiscing. I guess eventually not even my word alone was enough...I should’ve known, I could’ve stopped her.”

“Nazreen, what happened to Arsala was over 5 years ago, I know it’s hard to let go but it’s not allowing you to move forward. She was a huge part of your life, I can see it, but she’s in a better place. Tell me, do you think she would have been able to handle seeing you this way?”

I remained silent, I knew the answer to that, but I still couldn’t grasp the reality of her not being here anymore. Cubby was too important to just let go of that easily. I know Dr. Moosa was just trying to help, but she wouldn’t understand. 

“I’m going to take it that your silence means you know that she wouldn’t be able to bare it. Blaming yourself for it is not going to bring her back especially when it wasn’t your fault. You’ve made a lot of progress, but you can’t fully heal if you won’t let yourself. If you really want to help her now, pray for her, and she will know. Unfortunately, that’s all the time we have for today. Think about it, and next time maybe we can start nearing the end of your healing process.” 

This wasn’t the first time I heard that ‘hope-filled’ sentiment. Everyone had been trying to help me keep it together after the accident. Aside from Cubby’s family, I think it hit Zaron and me the hardest. I felt his pain, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t get to me worse than it did him. 

I sat beside my father in the car keeping my lips sealed hoping he wouldn’t query about the useless session. He was just itching to ask me, so I eventually gave him what he was hoping for. 

“The session went well today. Dr. Moosa says I’m making better progress and soon I might finally be at the end of the road to recovery.”

I saw his body ease as he let out a relieving sigh, and after realizing that I’d noticed, he quickly adjusted his posture and smiled. 

“That’s great sweetie, I’m glad things are going well. I’m proud of you.”

I smiled to see him finally at ease. I tried dealing with Arsala’s ‘death’ myself for the first 2 years and let’s just say it didn’t go well at all. I hated that I closed myself off so much from everyone, especially dad, he only wanted to see me finally okay, and I guess that’s what made him come to the conclusion of sending me to Dr. Moosa. She’d been Cubby’s therapist and so dad assumed she’d be a better choice and I have to say, he was right. Unlike most of these other money hungry lame excuses for help, she genuinely cared about getting me better. Dad would battle trying to pay the fee with the little extra money he made and Dr. Moosa knew, so she would take only a cut of the normal price from him. Of course she didn’t tell him, but I caught on after some time. I’d ask her why she didn’t want us to pay the full cost of the session; she just looked at me, smiled and said ‘It’s what Arsala would have wanted.’ I knew I could trust her, just like Cubby told me she did.

-

I got back to the chores I needed to finish as soon as I got home. It was already 5pm and supper needed to be ready soon. As much as time was never on my side, I managed to work a way around it. Supper used to be the time we’d finally get to laugh about the everyday struggle we call life as a family, but after life became crueller to me, I shut off and I guess I didn’t see how it was affecting those around me. After that, things were just not the same and those family suppers of laughter became a deafening silence. 

As soon as the dishes were done and the table cleared, I headed straight to my room for the rest of the night. I pulled out the box from beneath my bed as soon as it was lights out for everyone else and tore open a packet of sour worms as a snack, it was mine and Cubby’s favourite. They couldn’t know that I was still spending time on this, they’ll take all my work away if they dare found out, and I know the sergeant wouldn’t be happy about what I was using my resources for.

Maps and any sort of evidence lay scattered on my desk along with a laptop containing recordings and old surveillance of the airport she left at. The internet had made it much easier finding the world on a screen. I know where Cubby was headed and I was recently able to track the plane number and the route it was supposed to have taken the day she left. 

It was much easier tracking these things after being instated in the force, having access to various sources became as easy as knowing who to ask for it. My dream had always been to lecture English literature at an institution of education, but after the accident, my priority became finding Cubby.  After that, I joined the force, ‘To Serve and Protect’, but also... to find what I’d lost, or who I’d lost.

Everyone said I’d gone crazy, that she was dead and she was never coming back, they even considered sending me to the crazy house, but I could feel it, my Cubby is alive, and I was going to find her. 

The advancement of technology has made it easier to find what some people don’t want you to know with the right codes. The problem is, tracking a location you need is not easy when you don’t exactly know what you’re looking for, but those satellites floating around our little snow globe we call earth can be useful in these kind of situations. When you’ve been searching for as long as I have there’s a temptation to just give up, but a little patience and you will get exactly what you’re looking for and before you know it... Bingo! 

Just like that, I heard a small beep on my laptop. My fists clenched as the tears rolled down my cheeks and I felt my hope grow stronger.

“I’m coming to get you Cubby.”