Balance. Season 1

Untitled Part 7

Y/N POV

I quietly closed my bedroom door over and turned the key in the lock. I placed my head on the door frame. I could have killed Andy today. After he hit me with that energy ball, I just lost control of myself. In the very back of my head there was a little voice screaming at me to stop, to calm down, but my body wouldn't listen. It kept doing what it wanted to do. I was consumed by anger. If JK didn't stop me, I would have crushed his windpipe without batting an eyelid and then I probably would have turned on JK. I was dangerous. I spun around and leaned my back against the door. I truly was a demon. I slid down the door and pulled my knees up to my chest. What if it happens again? The only plan I had was to anger Hobi. If I done that, I would get myself fired up, I would kill him. The thought kept playing in my head. I wrapped my arms around my head and buried my face in my knees. I was so tired. Not sleepy tired just physically drained. I had to control how I was feeling, the sins would feel it if I didn't. I tried to think about happy thoughts, trying desperately to distract myself. All my happy thoughts revolved around Jackson. I smiled to myself. I thought about the day we first met. I knew who he was obviously. His band was one of the biggest in Korea at the time. He spoke to me. I was so nervous I tripped over cables and fell on my ass. I laughed a little thinking about it. The day we decided to bake a cake for Mark's birthday.... Neither one of us was very good at cooking, never mind baking. Jackson tried to open the bag of flour. He pulled too hard, ripping the bag apart sending a cloud of it to surround us. We were covered in it. I threw a blob of butter at him which smacked him straight in the face. It was a big mess but we had fun. The first attempt at the cake left it crumbling into pieces. We took that opportunity to take a break. We sat on the kitchen floor eating the crumbled pieces until we felt physically sick. Our second attempt wasn't much better but at least it stayed in cake form. Before we had finished it, Mark and JB had arrived. We gave up. We wished Mark a happy birthday then flopped down on the sofa, nursing our aching stomachs, leaving him to decorate his own cake.

M: You guys are the worst! Can't believe you are leaving me to decorate my own cake!

JW: Hey at least we made the cake.

JB: I'm not eating that....

Y/N: I don't blame you....

We all had some good laughs together. My favourite memory? The day Jackson proposed obviously. The greatest day of my life by far. It was my birthday weekend and to surprise me, all the guys decided to take me to Tokyo Disney Resort. They said it was for me but I knew they all secretly wanted an excuse to go. We had the greatest weekend there, playing on rides, watching the shows. On our last day in Japan we all decided to take part in Hanami. I was so excited, cherry blossoms were my favourite flower. I loved the way they fell from the trees and floated to the ground like a gentle flourish of snow. We all left together finding the perfect spot underneath the trees. Jackson, Mark and myself set up the picnic blankets for us all while the rest ran off to get some drinks and food for the group. Jackson placed a gentle kiss on my lips as we sat down on the blanket. Mark jumped up with excitement.

M: Omg guys this would make an amazing photo.

He pulled out his phone to take a picture as I shook my head. I looked to Mark and smiled for the camera.

Y/N: Mark this is taking for ever are you done?

M: Yeah sorry, you can look away now.

We laughed together as I turned back to face Jackson. I jumped to find him facing me. I looked to his hand, a small jewellery box. I raised my eyebrow.

JW: Hi....

Y/N: Hi???

He blushed.