A View On The Inside

Understanding Expectations

'Expectation', a word every single individual is very well acquainted with. But that line of expectation is so thin that a bit more of it can hurt you whereas less of it can abstain you from achieving what you truly desire. In this world, everyone has their own expectations from one another and has expectations to live up to from other individuals in their relations.

As a teenager when I talk about expectations, not only do I mean the expectations from myself but also what I expect out of people in different situations. It can be a simple sorry, acceptance of mistake if they made one, providing a rational solution when I am not in a state of mind to find one, an appreciation or support when it's necessary. I believe self-worth and self-esteem play a huge role when it comes to one's expectations from within, but when it comes to expectations from people, only the ones who truly value you can meet those.

In the past few months, I have understood or at least I have tried to, that expecting too much from people puts undue pressure on both the person as well as the relationship. As much as people say difference in opinion can ruin a relationship, I feel that difference in expectations has an equal effect or maybe even more. It may sound stupid but if you really think about it does make sense. One might expect the other to react, behave, express in a different matter or in most cases, simply understand. This difference in expectations in a way can be said to be the very cause of difference in opinion.

Lately I have been on the receiving end of statements such as "I don't expect you understand', "I didn't expect this from you", "I expected better from you"," I expected things to be better". While others may not have hurt as much but the first one surely did. All of us have been in similar situation facing similar statements yet pretending that the bond is still strong whereas each of these statements is a crack in the relationship, a crack so insignificantly significant.

I am not saying one should not have any expectations because the sole reason we are what we are is because of trying to live up to someone's or negate someone's expectations. What I am really trying to say is that having an expectation keeping in mind of the reality will be way more beneficial because one will have fewer disappointments when he/she learns to accept instead of expect.

At the end of the day you are responsible for your own happiness. If you expect others to make you happy, you will always be disappointed. In today' generation, I have observed that knowing our own expectations is hard to come by, its always a matter of time or experience that we must have to form an opinion and an expectation. Until then, we are oblivious to our very own. It always seems that everyone has a clear idea of what they expect from others but very few have the clarity about what they want versus what they expect from others. Our generation is missing on some very heartfelt moments since living up to your own expectations is way more satisfying than living up to someone else's.

Therefore, always have high expectations from yourself because then the only person you can blame for a screw up is you, the only person who can correct you is you and the only person who fights through the mess and comes up victorious is you.

N.