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"The roses are amazing Grandma," I said during dinner. Yep, no way I'm getting out of this cesspool.

"Thank you Heather," Grandma responded.

"Rory, how are things at Yale?" Grandpa asked her. "They're fine," she told him.

"And how is Columbia?" Grandpa asked me. "Fine," I mumbled.

"I thought we weren't allowed to talk about Yale or Columbia," Grandma muttered. "We're not allowed to pay for it Emily," Grandpa said.

"Oh here we go again," I rolled my eyes. "I wonder if we're allowed to visit," Grandma wondered. Interest equals fake.

"Or visit in disguise," Grandpa added.

"We have moved passed this already," Mom sighed. "Let's talk about something else."

"Oh so we aren't allowed to talk about Yale or Columbia?" Grandma looked at Mom.

"You can talk about it, stop putting words in my mouth," Mom retorted. "So moving on."

"Lorelai how's Luke?" Grandma asked her. "Thank you," Mom sighed with relief. "Luke is fine, we're still engaged."

"Well I was just asking because we never got a 'Save the Date' card," Grandma said.

"Well you will get one," Mom reassured her. "Well, is there a wedding? Do I need a dress? You haven't even picked a date!"

"It's June third!" Mom exclaimed

"It's a bit soon," Grandma mumbled. "We haven't seen him in a while, bring him to dinner next Friday."

"I'm not sure if he's available," Mom told her. "Then make him available," Grandma grumbled.

She turned to me. "Bring that boyfriend of yours."

I nearly choked on my food. "Why?"

"Well I haven't seen him in a long time," Grandma pointed out. "Three years," Rory mumbled.

"I'm not sure if he's available, he has a lot of.."

"Make him available!"

"Yes ma'am."

***

"I thought they postponed the wedding," I mumbled as me and Rory were playing Go Fish on my bed.

"That's what I thought," she muttered. "I can't believe that Grandma is forcing you to take Jess to Friday Night Dinner."

"Neither can I," I sighed, lying back and groaning loudly.

"Well next Friday night ought to be so fun," Rory told me.

"Kill me," I sighed. I was wearing Columbia sweats while Rory was wearing Yale ones.

"You should get some for your dad," Mom suggested as we came downstairs to eat pizza with tater tots.

"Or maybe go on campus for lunch," she added. "Where?" me and Rory asked in unison.

We looked at one another. "I'll show him Yale," Rory offered.

Now our next order of business, me telling Jess the unfortunate news that changes his schedule.

"Oh God!" he sighed. "I tried to get you out of it," I mumbled. "But they hate me," Jess pointed out.

"I'm sorry," I pouted. "If it makes you feel better they're likely to be more focused on my mom and Luke and their wedding."

I looked down. "But in the heat of the argument..I may have let slip that we're planning to move in together."

Jess bit his lip and sighed. "But they didn't respond, I was getting given out to for saying bullshit in their house," I told him.

I gripped his hand to make him look at me. "We don't have to go if you really don't want to."

"No, it's okay," he told me. "I'll go."

"If you wanna abandon ship early, I have a list of excuses," I told him.

"What's your plan?" Jess asked me. "You call my cell discreetly and I'll pretend it's Andrea telling me the apartment's on fire," I smirked.

"You are evil," Jess laughed and he kissed me.

***

"So Yale today, Columbia tomorrow," Dad smiled as me and Rory walked with him through Yale.

I had no classes so I might as well.

"Having hot parents is annoying," Rory laughed. "Why?" Dad asked her, confused.

"Because the college students won't stop checking you out," I explained as I sipped my latte.

When Rory showed Dad one of the classes, he pretended to snore and I couldn't stop myself from laughing.

In response, we were smacked on the arm by Rory. "Are we going to see your place?" Dad asked her.

Rory pulled a face. "Yep."

Once we got to a door which I didn't recognise, Rory jumped into the explanation.

"I got voted editor of the paper," she told us. "Congrats!" I cheered. "Rory that's amazing," Dad smiled.

"But Paris didn't take it well and she kicked me out," Rory continued. "What?" Dad was shocked.

I looked at the door. Who was she living with..if not Paris?

"I moved in with my boyfriend," Rory confessed. She unlocked the door and led us in.

"Can I use the bathroom?" I asked Logan and I ducked away. Hopefully Dad was cool with it.

I came back out eventually. "We are going to dinner," Rory announced. "You have...great soap," I mumbled.

Dad and Rory went ahead and me and Logan hung back. "I'm really sorry about what happened a couple of months ago, I was drunk and I was a jerk."

"You were," I mumbled. "But I accept your apology."

"Actually, I was planning something for Valentine's Day," Logan told me. "You and your boyfriend should come."

"We'll think about it, no promises," I told him. "Open invite," he clarified.

***

We were all around eating dinner and Rory skipped, thanks Rory. It was pretty awkward.

"So, Jess," Grandma looked at him while we were having drinks. "You live in New York?"

"Yes," he answered her. "With Heather?" Grandma looked between us. "Well no, but we see each other often," he mumbled.

"But you're planning to move in together right?"

Damn, she remembered. I discreetly nudged Jess, letting him know if he wants to escape, he can do it.

"So, do you still work at Walmart?" Grandpa interrogated him.

"Uh, no, I work for a small publishing company," he told them. "I wrote my own book."

"It's very good Grandpa," I added.

"Well you should look into getting work insurance," Grandpa suggested.

Jess managed to mess with his phone while Grandpa went on about the dangers of insurance.

My phone started to ring. "Honestly," Grandma sighed as I answered it.

"Hello? What?! When?! Oh no, is there much damage? Oh God, yeah, I'll be there as soon as I can, see you in a bit."

I hung up. "What's wrong?" Jess played along. "Uh, my apartment caught fire, my kitchen's a wreck, I have to go see the damage."

"Oh of course...go go," Grandpa ushered us out and we got out.

We made our way to the car and I drove us away, just as Mom and Luke were pulling in.

We both sighed with relief. "You do realise your grandfather is gonna bug you about the insurance, right?" Jess asked me.

I sighed. "I hate you."

"No you don't."

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