Hate To See Your Heart Break - A Tayley FanFiction

Chapter 8

                Hayley’s POV

                I knew it. I knew that I loved him. For two whole weeks it was killing me. In the cafeteria I’d get butterflies seeing him come in. I’d shake whenever we’d hug and say goodbye to each other at the end of the day. I’d get scared if I thought he wasn’t going to be there in class every day. I knew it. I knew I loved Taylor. I loved him.

                I had no idea how I’d tell Jeremy, but I guess he kind of already knew something was up with me and Taylor anyways. He’d always stare at us oddly, or comment on my behavior around him. But he’d have to understand. Wouldn’t he?

                I found Taylor at his locker, shoving a bunch of binders along with his textbooks inside. I quietly snuck up behind him, and shouted “BOO!” into his ear. He turned around, shaking his head laughing, not looking surprised whatsoever.

                “You gotta work on your screams there Hayles,” he said, kissing my forehead. Other people around us glared at me.

                “She needs to grow up,” I heard someone whisper behind us. Jeremy’s hand formed into a fist. I brushed him back with my hand.

                “Ignore it,” I said quietly. Nobody really did like me. Nobody liked the weird, annoying girl in the back of class in any school. But I didn’t care. I grew up knowing where I stood. It least I found others who loved me for being who I am.

                “You can’t just let them get away with it,” Taylor said angrily. “You can’t let them get away with what they’re doing to you.”

                I pushed a hand on his chest. “I don’t care. As long as I’m with you I’ll be just fine.” Taylor smiled, and kissed me again.

                “It’ll still annoy me,” Taylor told me. “I hate seeing people say those things to you. You don’t deserve being called anything that isn’t nice.”

                God, I really was lucky. “Don’t show them that it bugs you,” I said softly. “Don’t let them get what they want, a reaction.”

                Taylor tried to object, but he stopped talking and remained silent. We quietly walked into the cafeteria, holding hands. “Do you need to get a lunch?” I asked him.

                He shook his head. “I’m not hungry.” He always said that. He never ate. I never saw him eat, only if I ever told him to.

                “You have to be hungry,” I said, getting worried. “You never eat. You have to be hungry.”

                Jeremy appeared, walking towards us. “What’s wrong?” He asked, looking at us. “Oh wait. I think I know what’s up.”

                “You gotta get Taylor to eat, Jerm.” I looked up at him worriedly. “He never eats.”

                Taylor rolled his eyes. “Hayles, I’m fine. Seriously guys, it’s okay. I’m just feeling—“

                “Sick, anxious, worried?” I started asking really quickly. He never got to answer any of my questions.  “You make me really worried sometimes! I get anxious sometimes wondering why you don’t eat. Why don’t you eat Taylor?” I clutched onto his arm tightly, feeling a mix of emotions pour on me. “I just want you to be healthy.”

                Jeremy looked at where my hand was on Jeremy’s arm. I didn’t move it. I didn’t care anymore. “Please tell me,” I went on. “Please, please, please tell—“

                “Can you just stop Hayley?” Taylor said angrily, backing away. “I don’t eat because I seriously do have stomach problems. I only eat tiny amounts at a time. There, you know.” He was shaking. “Can you just stop asking about it?”

                I backed away, feeling tears form in my eyes. “I,” I said. “I—I—I.” That was all I could say.

                Jeremy turned to Taylor. “Dude, I never knew that you had a,” He began, letting his voice trail off.

                Taylor looked at him like he was in pain. “Yes,” he said stiffly. “I have an eating disorder. I can’t help it. It won’t go away. It’s nothing that serious though, it can’t hurt me at the moment.” He closed his eyes. “And I really hate talking about it. So could we end this conversation now?”

                We both nodded our heads. I didn’t feel like eating anymore, or being there in general. I wanted to go. I had to get out. Jeremy stared at me, trying to reach my arm. I leaned back. “Hayley, you okay?” He asked. Taylor looked at me suddenly.

                I finally found out something to say. “I’m not hungry anymore. I think I’m going to be sick.” And I did really feel like throwing up. I ran down the hallway, holding my hands over my mouth. I heard Jeremy calling my name out, I heard the footsteps behind me, but they stopped as I ran into the girl’s bathroom. I shut myself into a stall, and began throwing up. Whenever someone would yell at me, it would make me sick to my stomach, completely disgusted with myself for disappointing someone. But no one ever knew how I felt about it. And I hoped that no one would ever discover about it.

                Ten minutes later, I was finished. I was shaking, holding onto the toilet seat for support. I wiped my mouth with some tissue paper, and walked out of the bathroom. I went immediately to the office, and asked to phone home. When mom picked up on the second ring and said hello, I told her to pick me up.