"Ninja sword!" I cried, drawing the twin swords as I burst through the door.
"Hi," a bored, hairy teen said from behind the cash register. "Welcome to the Streets of New York pizzeria. Can I take your order."
"Yes, I'll take three slices of a garlic and pepperoni pizza." I put my swords back into their sheaths.
The kid raised an eyebrow at me. "That has to be the worst Spider man costume ever, dude." He straightened as he rang up my order.
"Hey!" I cried in indignation. "I've been around longer than Spider man. He stole my costume design! I tell everyone this!"
"Whatever."
I sigh and sit down. I turn and see you, the audience.
"Oh, hello!" I cried, waving at you. "I bet you are wondering to yourself, what happen to the 4th wall, Wade?" I lean in close. "I say, screw it."
"Dude, who are you talking to?" The Pizza teen said, bringing over my order.
"Invisible people in the sky." I say cheerily.
The kid rolls his eyes and walks off.
"Gets them every time. You guys are just in another universe where you believe me to be a fiction character made up by sweaty, lifeless nerds and old men, but you are so wrong. Some of those nerds have lives. Hilarious, right? But it's true!"
I lift my mask over my mouth to reveal part of my disfigured, yet handsome face. (Hey, I am very sexy) I begin to eat my pizza.
"I bet you are wondering why I'm here." I said, chewing with my mouth open. "I had another series of epic adventures with not so epic people. I remember like it was 45 hours ago, 23 minutes and 16 seconds ago. But it wasn't! That's way to specific! I don't even have a watch! Flashback."
Nothing happened.
"Oh, right, this is a book. I need to use my vast brain to do that."
I struggled, trying to activate the flashback.
"It's not like the movies!" I said, straining. I think I have it now.
"Ninja sword!" I cried, drawing the twin swords as I burst through the door.
"Hi," a bored, hairy teen said from behind the cash register. "Welcome to the Streets of New York pizzeria. Can I take your order."
"Yes, I'll take three slices of a garlic and pepperoni pizza." I put my swords back into their sheaths.
Wait, we already did this. I need to go farther back. Hold on.
YOU ARE READING
The Amazing Deadpool
FanfictionTime to bring back your favorite mask for your task, the Anti-hero for hire, the guy that won't die... DEADPOOL!!! Learn of his origins, greatest and infamous team ups, his home made recipe for zucchini bread, how babies are born, and... Wait, I los...
