Big Girl Pants

<Try Me!>

Harlem High school is a cross between 'Ghetto as Hell' and 'White as Wonder bread.'

It's a strange combination but it works for everyone. The whites participate in Varsity sports and JV sports and cheerleading and Science Fairs and all that good jazz, with the exception of a handful of Asians. While the black folks hang around, cause trouble, and create their own stereotypical cliques. With the exception of a wide array of Hispanics. But for some reason, all that only applies to the girls of this school. The guys do whatever the hell they want. 

You must be wondering where I fit. Considering my skin ain't black or white. And I'm not hispanic either. There's a few kids around that look like me, but most of them are either really quiet and keep to themselves, or REALLY loud and act like they better than everyone. I hang around with Tia's group. The hot popular black girls. I get a lot of lip from them though. Most of em' are jealous. Think I'm stuck up and shit just cause' I'm ultra light skinned. I can't help it that my mom's old stripper job got her knocked up with some rich white guy's kid. Me. Tia' s the only one who really sees me as just...me. 

She gets it, but only since we've been hanging for so long. I'm so happy I have her around. Or else I'd be friendless, still acting proud, but eating in the girl's bathroom.

"Get out yo' head, Tammy." 

I snap my head up and offer Imani a weak smile. She rolls her deep brown eyes and continues talking bout' some new boy who's so "fine" and TOTALLY "fuckable". Tia nods along to her story with a perplexed look on her face. I'm the only one who can tell she don't really care. 

I'm only half-listening to the story anyways. I don't wanna say anything in case Mr.Jefferson walks in and gives me a slip for running my mouth in class.

"Tammy, look who's sucking face over there." Veronica snickers and jabs one neon orange curlex nail towards the front of the room.

My face gets hot when I realize who it is.

Stephano. And Courtney, of course. 

She's straddling his lap and darting her tongue in and out his mouth like a lizard.  He's running his hands through her hair wildly. I could never do that with him. I'm to heavy for that, I'd crush his crotch in a minute. Not in a good way. I can tell immediately what they're tryna do. Make me mad. And it's working. 

Tia scoffs loudly. 

"She's such a whore."

The girls murmur in agreement. 

"They both are." I deadpan. 

"Stephano is fine though.." Imani says mindlessly as she bites her lip.

I don't even bother responding to her. She was dumb as a doorknob sometimes. Even if she was the "leader" of our group.

The girls get quiet. No one wants to point out to her, again, what he'd done to me. 

"Sorry I'm late yall." Mr.Jefferson bellows as his fat self rolls into the room. Mr. Jefferson makes me look real skinny. He's like, four hundred pounds and he's always sweaty. His pit stains show through his tight fitting grey blazer jacket as he sets his stuff down on his desk with a loud thump.