Third Love

Theory of Love

During my first year of college my Philosophy Professor gave a lecture on the theory of love. The theory followed that everyone will have three loves in their lifetime. The First Love is the fantasy love that we believe will be our last. This type of love tends to focus on how others perceive us, instead of our true feelings. The Second Love is considered the "hard love", the one that will be painful and teach us how to grow. The Third Love is something you will never see coming, a surprise love that will last. This love teaches not only how to feel love, but also how to give love. 

For almost five years I believed I had found my "third love" in high school. Shin Ji Hoon was handsome, kind, smart, and made me feel cherished. He protected me and helped me through my first year of high school. From time to time I was still convinced he was the Master of Revenge Note app that changed my life. 

Ji Hoon changed my life.

Throughout high school we went everywhere together. He pushed and pulled me along until I was accepted into the school of my dreams, Ewha Women's College. Ji Hoon was only a twenty-minute train ride away at Seoul National University. We were able to see each other every weekend, scraping together the few hours we could between studying and traveling.

The summer after freshman year Ji Hoon's economics professor recommended him for the London School of Economics summer bridge program. It was a once in a lifetime chance and he was the youngest student accepted into the program. He talked about turning it down, wanting to spend his summer with me instead. I could see his desire to go. The London travel guide stuffed in his backpack or the LSE tee-shirt he tried to cover up when I surprised him with lunch. Tired of his irritable behavior, I sat him down and told him to go.

I had no idea at the time it would be the end of our relationship, or he would be the one to teach me the hard lesson of love, and how to let go.  

"Ho Goo Hee, whatever you are doing stop because we are going out tonight and you are not getting out of it." Her best friend Jung Deok Hee announced as she burst into her dorm room.

Goo Hee jumped and banged her head on the frame of the bed. She rubbed the sore spot on her head as she took a deep breath, a refusal on her tongue.

"Don't even think about saying no. You have been locked up in this room for months, only coming out for class." Deok Hee's hands were on her hips, her feet apart, face fierce.

Taking a slow deep breath Goo Hee quickly saved her document before she turned off her laptop.

"I'm too tired to argue with you when you're like this. Where are we going?" Goo Hee let out an annoyed sigh.

Deok Hee clapped her hands and pushed the glasses up her sharp nose.

"It's a surprise, but dress for dancing."

Goo Hee groaned; she was a terrible dancer. 

Deok Hee opened her small closet, pulling out different shirts and muttering about a waste of space. She pulled out a pair of black skinny jeans and a red v-neck shirt. She shoved them into Goo Hee's arms and pushed her toward the bathroom.

"This will have to do, but soon we need to go shopping. Change, then I can do your hair and makeup."

Deok Hee over the last five years had developed her own style. She embraced her self-proclaimed nerd with sex appeal. Her ability to find any information or item, including the perfect outfit, made her famous around campus. She planned to be a fashion reporter and continue following around her favorite idols.

Goo Hee washed her face, slipped on the clothes, and stared at her reflection. She'd lost weight over the last few months. The dark circles around her eyes had finally started to fade. It had been over a year and half since Ji Hoon had left for London. Her studies flourished while her appetite and sleep pattern faltered. With the support of Deok Hee, and roommates, she slowly moved past the pain of being left behind again.

Last month she even agreed to go on a blind date set up by one of her classmates. The date had been a disaster, but the food was good. She tried and that was enough.

Goo Hee opened the door and stepped out to a night of possibilities.