I find myself in a field crying out "BECCON. BECCON." in a yugoslavian accent. I am dressed in a black leotard, a yellow and green miniskirt, and uggs. a silver goat is pouncing around by a field of cattle just a few thousand feet away. I start spinning around uncontrollably. I can't stop. then I'm laughing. I'm slithering everywhere and i can't seem to contain my slithering. my silly dog dervipskil is humping a flower. dervipskil is a very stupid dog. I call to him, but no words come out. instead I just keep chanting, "BECCON. BECCON." a tomato hits me in the lips. I lick the juice off on my lips, but then an egg hits my forehead. I start slapping butterflies. WHAT? then my teacher slide onto the stage next to me. she slaps my hair follicles until they are rotten. she scolds me for putting on such a bad play for my kindergarten class. I look into her eyes. I reach into my pocket and pull out my contact lenses. I gently put one in each of her eyes. she says "why did you do that little boy?" I reply, "so now you can see the world like I do. it has so much to give. now come and grade my paper I need to show it to my mom. she will understand. oh yes. OIEE OH PLITTTT!" I slap her on the cheek with the force of seventeen fig newton's and dive into the pond. I swim with my wife faster than a plant on steroids. I wake up and i am in heaven. little babies are bathing me and feeding me munster cheese. this is so right. no one will hurt me with these babies bathing and feeding me. I am safe as a blue feather. MMMMMMM. I AM MORE FREE THAN A PIGEON IN THE DESERT. I AM A POPSICLE. SLURP SLURP slurp take me away to fish field where I can suck away all the cherries and oil paints that cover your soul. good year, troubled peacock. Good year indeed.
