Walnuts

After a few weeks of court decisions, my mother’s sister was given custody of me until I turned eighteen. She owned a house for the mentally handicapped, Walnut’s Home for the Mentally Handicapped. I never knew why she had named it that. I guess because it was a nut house but she didn’t seem like she had that kind of humor. Maybe it was just a coincidence.

I let a few tears escape as I thought about what had happened because of me. I knew that it was my fault that my parents are dead, no matter what anybody tries to tell me.

The next morning, I woke up and just stared at the wall, thinking about my restless night. The little amount of time that I had slept was spent in a world of nightmares, as all of my sleep had been lately.

“Knock, knock.” Yes, Aunt Mable actually said ‘knock, knock’ instead of knocking on my door. These next two years are going to be long.

“Morning Aunt Mable,” I mumbled, pretending that I had just woken up instead of been awake for an hour.

“Morning, dear. Breakfast is in the kitchen if you want any. Later today I want to introduce you to everyone. They are just dying to know who the pretty young lady is that just moved in.” She giggled as she said the last part. I don’t know if I will ever get used to her, but I don’t really have much of a choice. That’s what I get for inadvertently killing my parents.

I stumbled downstairs and wandered around until I found the kitchen. It took me a few minutes because I was distracted by what Mable had said. I didn’t think that I was that pretty. Sure, I was skinny (but not anorexic-overly skinny) and I guess my bright blue eyes were kind of pretty in the right light, and when I styled my hair it looked nice but I never thought I was pretty. She was probably just saying that to make me feel better about my dead parents.

When I got to the kitchen, there were two other people there. A pretty Latino girl that was probably a few years older than me and the guy that I saw talking to Mable last night, Seamus.

“Hi. Are you the niece that Mable was talking about or just another nut case?” Seamus said.

“The niece, but what if was a nut case? Not a very nice way to talk.” I replied.

“I was just joking. Mable showed me a picture of you the other day when she found out that you were staying here. I’m Seamus by the way. I work here.”

“Bella.” The girl who was standing next to him said as she raised her hand. “I work here too. Ignore Seamus, he’s a jerk.”

“Oh,” I said blushing. “I’m Rory.”

“Want a pancake? They’re a little dry but whatever.” Bella offered.

“No thanks. Do you know where my aunt is, though? I think she wanted to introduce me to everyone.”

“Um, check in the living room. I think that’s where she said she was going. If not, then check upstairs in the fourth door down,” Seamus replied, pointing as he talked.

I went past them, around the counter, and down a little hall toward where Seamus had pointed. Through a closed door, I heard Mable’s voice so I went in there.

“Hi, deary. How were the pancakes?” she said before she was interrupted by a gurgling noise. “Oh yeah, I wanted to introduce you to everyone. This is Lewis, Dan, Angie, and Janet. George and Alice are upstairs still sleeping. I’ll introduce you guys later. And Bella and Seamus help out here and are somewhere around the house.” She pointed to the man in the wheelchair that I had seen last night, then to a man who was probably in his forties that was playing with tinker toys, and next to two women in their twenties or thirties that were talking-- or more correctly gurgling, as she said each name. “Say hi to Aurora everyone,” she commanded.

Angie and Lewis waved, but Dan and Janet gurgled out hellos.

“Hi,” I said, not sure whether they would really understand. I turned back to my aunt, “I already met Seamus and Bella. They were in the kitchen when I woke up.”

“Oh that’s great. They’re nice kids. Its too bad about their parents though.”

“What happened to their parents?” I started to ask, but just as I got to the middle of ‘happened’, Seamus walked in.

“Hi everyone. Rory. Mable.” He said to the room in a cheery voice, nodding to me and my aunt in turn. “Do you want me to wake up George and Alice and get them dressed for the day?”

“Sure honey. Do you mind showing Aurora how to too? She can help you and Bella from now on.” When she said ‘Aurora’ I winced, wondering if she would ever get my name right. Seamus saw me wince and gave me a weird look.

“No problem, Mable. Let’s go.”

“So you don’t like being called Aurora?” Seamus asked when we were safely out of earshot of Mable.

“Not since I was three.”

“Why not? It’s a pretty name.”

“But I don’t act like an Aurora. It just doesn’t fit me. Rory is much better.”

“Why don’t you tell Mable that?”

“She’s been nice enough taking me in and I don’t want to seem rude. I don’t think it would make her stop anyway.”

After a minute of silence Seamus said “My mother’s name was Aurora.”

“Oh.” I didn’t know what else to say.

“Real, not adoptive, mom that is.”

“What happened to her?” I could never understand how a mom could give up her child, unless she had no choice.

“She left my younger sister, older brother, and me. She just disappeared. My brother took care of us for a few months, but then he left too and I haven’t seen him since. He was an ass and it was better when he left, but it made it harder because I was just eleven years old and I had to take care of my four-year-old sister. Child services eventually found us and we were split up in foster care and I haven’t seen her either. Bella became my sister and that was cool, except that our parents started drinking a lot more and then they started doing drugs. Our dad got mad one night and shot our mom and then himself. Mable took us in. Don’t know why. We were just the poor kids of druggies who killed themselves.”

By the time that Seamus finished talking, I was regretting that I didn’t stop him and say that he didn’t have to tell me and that I shouldn’t have asked. He was sad now, and angry. At who, I didn’t know. We didn’t talk after that until we got to George and Alice’s rooms.