sleepless cinderella ☆ ten | ✔

10

The next time he tried to pull back, you let him, taking one of your hands in a futile attempt to wipe at the hot tears spilling down your cheeks. Ten wasn't faring any better on the not-crying front, rivers still streaming down from his eyes, biting his lip to keep the sobs at bay.

"Y/N," his voice cracked over your name, bringing a new wave of pain to your chest.

"Ten," you whispered his name in response, grasping for his hand. "What happened?"

"I... took too many pills."

Fear seized you once again at this revelation, and Ten quickly went to smooth it over.

"I didn't want to kill myself. I just... wanted a break. From everything. Surgery, the expectations, the pedestal I'm put on as this superhero, the hospital, the Liu's... everything. I wasn't thinking. I really did just want a break. Please believe me, I didn't want to die."

"I believe you."

"That's why as soon as they found me, I told them what I did. So they'd help me. I didn't want to die, Y/N. I didn't."

"I believe you, Ten," you repeated, using your other hand to stroke his hair. "I believe you."

"I don't want to die."

"I believe you."

"There's more. I—" he ducked his head, bringing your linked hands up to his face as he was lost in a bout of sobs again. You let him go, let him cry and slobber over your knuckles as he struggled to find his words once more.

He tried again, "I... I did lie to you. Since the first day we met. I'm not a hero. I lost a patient. I still—I still know the exact date and time. Eighteen hours and thirty-six minutes before... we met at that party. His name was Michael Liu, he was thirty years old. Those were his parents, and his daughter Zhangli in the cafeteria. She's seven years old and has to grow up without her father because of me."

"No, Ten," you gripped his hand with both of yours, much firmer. The words that Michael Liu's mother had said to you that day made sense now. "His mother told me to remind you that it's not your fault. She told me to tell you that every day, and I will. It's not your fault. They've forgiven you, now forgive yourself. Please."

Ten nodded. It was a jerky but resolute nod, "I'll try. I really will."

Now with some little bit of clarity, you realized that it really was you who was shaking. The stress and emotional turmoil that had built up in your body left your muscles trembling. Ten gently moved you to be fully on his hospital bed with him. You knew full well that you were probably still cold and wet, but that didn't seem to bother him as he settled you between his legs with your back to his chest, enveloped by his warmth. You were now able to feel his steady heartbeat and deep breaths that the monitors had promised you. Just knowing that he was okay—really and truly okay—brought you to tears again.

"I was scared, Ten," you admitted to him, turning your head to be able to bury your face in the crook of his neck.

Feeling that you were crying again, one of his thumbs wiped at the few tears he could reach from the current position.

"I'm sorry."

You were silent for a moment, just letting yourself be held by Ten, nothing else mattering to you at all right then.

"Y/N, your skin is cold," he murmured, warmer hands smoothing over your chilly arms.

He tugged at the blanket underneath you insistently. Once he freed it, he wrapped it around the two of you.

"The rain is cold."

"Yeah, it is," he agreed, gently resting his head against yours and halting his fingers on your stomach, rubbing gentle patterns there. "I am so sorry. For everything I put you through, not just tonight. I absolutely avoided anything serious. It made everything easier, to pretend like I could be carefree and not have to deal with anything. I avoided talking about Michael, and I avoided my feelings for you. Because they are serious, and deep, and that shit's scary."

You chuckled lightly at his phrasing, bringing your face back out of the crook of his neck to instead look at your hands as you played with his fingers.

"But I don't want to avoid them anymore, and I'm so sorry that I ever did in the first place. I want to actually move in with you, and get a cat together, and formally meet your parents, and fly you out to Thailand to meet mine, and..." He took a deep breath, voice even stronger as he continued, "to tell you that I love you."

Your motions stilled. A sharp inhale of your own was followed by the beeps of Ten's vitals steadily increasing. He was nervous, getting more-so with each second that you didn't say or do anything.

Sitting up from where you had been leaning against his chest, you turned to be able to look at him. Look at the beautiful man that had just professed his love for you. You wanted to say it back, but you couldn't. You just didn't know enough about him yet. So instead, you threaded your fingers through the black locks of hair above the nape of his neck and pulled his lips to crash against yours. And hopefully, he could feel it through the kiss. Your promise to say it to him later, say it once you had truly fallen in love with who he really was.

You loosened your grip on his hair, and he did the same with the hands that were at your arms. Just loose enough for you to be able to whisper, your lips barely ghosting over his, "We should get a black cat."

"And what should we name him?" Ten replied, making no move to widen the distance between the two of you.

"What's a really good cat pun that we can make with any of your four names?"

Suddenly you were back in Ten's arms, his body practically vibrating as he laughed. You were laughing too, giggles bubbling up before you could stop them as he kept hugging you through his laughing fit. It wasn't that funny, but you knew it went deeper than just that.

It went deeper than just that.