I don't understand love.
Wow, isn't that the most cliche thing that anyone has said. But it's true, I really don't. I don't know if I've ever even been in love. I've definitely been "in like", but I don't know about love.
Is love one of those things that you know it when you experience it? I don't know about you guys, but I often spend time on YouTube just watching videos about love and crushes. What's the difference between liking and loving? How can you tell if he likes you?
I've recently said that I'm swearing off all guys until I'm 25. Mostly because I've recently experienced things that make my heart physically hurt. I feel like I've lost my best friend, and yet he and i have almost already returned to our toxic cycle. That one couple that say they're just friends, but no one believes them? And then they get in a fight, but then they're friends again? That's us.
There's someone else that I know as well. You know that one guy at school that's just sooo sweet, kind, and impossibly good at everything? The guy that every girl likes? That's this guy. I try to put myself in his shoes, and he must be so tired of girls, except one, and she happens to be one of my best friends.
Maybe it's stupid, and maybe it's love. Every time I see him, I want to smile so hard. We've had some good conversations, but it's never going to happen. It hurts. Is it love?
Why are we humans so obsessed with love? I guess it's because we are hardwired to feel love. I commit to it though, and it turns my life upside down.
Maybe this is all just teenage angst. I don't really know, but I kind of just want it to all stop.
YOU ARE READING
Thoughts
RandomLife is rough. Everybody's going through something. Most don't want to share, but be aware. My issues are my own, and sometimes it's better to be alone. I don't know, but I have some thoughts.
