A Diary

Tuesday, September 10th 2019.

Dear diary,
If I were to rate this day... I would give it a 8/10.
It was pretty good in my opinion.. I did get a shit ton of science homework though. I started grade 10 just last week, I also just came back from nicaragua since I went there over the summer for about 3 weeks. I didn't really enjoy it, it was way too hot and the bugs there are super big! Over the summer I did a lot of thinking. Especially about my sexuality. To be honest I think I'm either bi or straight, I don't really know why I'm obsessed over it! I shouldn't even be stressing about it because to be honest I don't really wanna label myself as something... as if anyone's gonna ask me lmao. Speaking of stress, I hate how I get stressed over the smallest things EVER. I stressed about school starting (it's pretty normal but I was STRESSED stressed, not like typical "omg school is starting soon lol" stress. Like I literally cried so many times during the last week of summer) and I stressed about changing my class. See, I thought I needed more than one credit for PE but I didn't and I accidentally chose that course for grade 10. I wanted to take ComTech instead of gym and I was stressing about how my whole schedule is gonna change if I do change my class. Anyways I changed my class and I'm really happy about it, my schedule didn't change at all which I'm so glad about. I'm taking graphic design... NOT coding. Graphic design is basically learning how to use photoshop and making advertisements. I love it. I haven't really talked about TODAY have I? Okay. So, my friend Nicole said that she wanted me to join art club with her and to meet her after school but I ditched her because I got nervous and I feel terrible about it. I'm such an idiot OH MY GOD I'm so self centred. Part of the reason is that I want to join the badminton team but I don't wanna be part of two clubs because (I hate this about myself) I'm easily stressed. I'm even stressed right now because I'm writing this to reduce stress but I'm writing it when I should be doing homework and my dad doesn't let me sleep super late at night which I get but I procrastinate too much and I hate that about myself too. I really need more confidence but that's not just something you can easily get. I always act like I'm confident around people so they don't judge me for being "too shy" or something like that. I'm actually a big ass cry baby. I literally cry over everything but no one knows about it lmaooo it's just too easy to hide your feelings. Anyway to end this on a positive note.. I really like the classes I'm taking this semester and hopefully no one reads this because I'm gonna be talking about EVERYTHING that happens.

- s