Needy

C H A P T E R O N E

Family. What everyone was supposed to have, along with happiness and safety. Well my friend that's not the case here. My name is Ravyn, Ravyn Allie Lu. My mother gave me that name, which is one of the many reasons why I hate it. My mother is Iris Lu aslo known as the worst human being alive.

Sure she can put on an act when we're in public but when we're indoors she acts as if I'm nonexistent, at first it gets lonely but when this routine has been happening for the last ten years you get used to it.

I have siblings, well one to be exact, her name is ivy. She claims to have a perfect life while writing about nonsense. I'm guessing she forgot about me and my mother while getting famous but I could give any more fucks about her.

As for my dad well that asshole left a long time ago. A few days after I was born. I wouldn't blame him, I'm instant karma. Every time I make a friend I do something to make them leave. So my circle is small. Way to small, but I've been alone for a long time so it's nothing new.

Sure I talk to people but I don't claim them as my friends. Most of the people I talk to never really want to hear about my problems.

My life is messed up. Really messed up. Sometimes I wish I had a brother who was cool and protective of me. But hey a girl can dream.

My only friend is a mountain well a little campsite I made on the mountain. It may sound weird but it's like my only place of peace and happiness. No drugs, alcohol and rage just peace and quiet.

When i walk through the doors of the worst place to ever exist I instantly regret coming. I make a mental note to blend in with a group of teens next time. A lot of people know me as the zen girl, I just walk around as if I'm happy but none of them know what I have been through. Well the only thing they know so far is that I was sent to a nut house but the thing is they don't know why I was sent there. Only I know the dark secret and false accusations. My god I hate this place.

School goes by quickly and as I pull my money out to go get me some dinner some girl shoulder checks me.

"Uhm excuse me, sorry." The girl says. She looks lost.

I don't really need school I think I just use it as an excuse to leave the house.

As I walk into lilos the first person I see is lily. She is a tall 17 year old with blue eyes and blonde hair. She's pretty in a way. I don't judge people of their looks but by their personality. So of course when I stepped foot in here I thought nothing of her.

"Ray, you're here!" She says.

"Yep, this place is dinner for tonight." I say getting a menu from the counter. I don't need it really I just want to waste time here for a bit.

"So How is school?"

"It's alright. What about you?" I says while putting the menu back.

"I'm getting through it slowly but surely."

"That's the spirit, so what can I do to get a decent burger around here?"
I ask while throwing my hands up.

"Ahh gotcha." Lily says while winking and writing down my order.

I spend the rest of my day sitting at park and eating half of my burger and fries, then sitting on a bench feeding the birds with the bun of my burger.

By six I have nothing to do so I decide to leave the park and head to my zone. My zone is the mountain space, my favorite spot in the world.

After about two hours I head home, get yelled at by my mom for coming home late, take my sleeping pills and pass out.
I suffer from insomnia, an illness I picked up when my dad left. Well after my mom told me that he left. She had me thinking that the fucker was dead but in reality he left. Honestly i prefer him being dead than alive. when i was about eleven years old i would convince myslef that he would come back and tell me that he loves me and tells me that hes sorry but it never happened.

Im woke by the beautiful sound of rain, not to mention the smell of it. Rain makes me happy and sometimes i want to lay on the road until a car hits me but what good will that do?

I get ready to do nothing real fast and head downstairs. My mother is making herself breakast, most likely for herself.

"Ray, I know you're behind me so im just going to tell you" she sya while turning away from the oven and looking at me.

"what is it?" I ask, clearly unintrested.

"Well, my freind is having a dinner for her new neighbor and we are going. I dont want to hear what you have to say so get ready. If youre not going to go then dont bother coming back to this house for a little while." she says while choping up some weird healthy shit.

"Fine." I manage to say while heading out of the door.

"She's most likely going out and geting shit faced or bringing someone home." I tell Lily
"Well eihter way you're not going back there, ou can stay at my house." she say while pouring another glass of water for me. She's done with her shift but I asked if I could talk with her, she didnt mind.

"I'm not going to your house I have my own house and if she ever tries to bring back another man into that shithole than she better have a plan B because I can not let history reapeat itself."

She looks at me with a weird expression and sits down next to me.

'Whats that supposed to mean?" she asks, worry evident on her face.

"Nothing nevermind I'm going home. If you need anything you know where i live." i say grabbing my bag and head wherever my feet take me.

This mountain, god i love it. The light wind pushes my hair back a little and i can feel the emptyness exit my body and calmness enter my system.

My little cabin is decorated with drawings that i made, some of them are bought but thats a story for a different time.

I didnt want to be like other people and put up fairylights and polaroids so i put a little matress on the floor and put a clean sheet over it. On top of the matress is a window that i put little butterflies around, next to my matress are my books and drawings. I put a little carpet on the floor so i dont feel cols at night, i have a little tiny desk in front of the window by the door. More books and drawings cover that portion of the room and next to it i have a chaor filled with blankets. I wash all the bed sheets and blankets at my house.

Its about 6pm by the time im climbing down the hill and heading home.
The events for tonight werent what I had in mind at all.