Loved In The Wrong Way

Chapter 8

I looked at this nigga like he was fucking crazy.

"Nigga you crazy?" I got off of the bed and yelled

"Yo ass need to start fucking packing. I'm not playing with you. Wrong day, wrong nigga."

"Why aren't you dead?"

He pinned my hands over my head against the wall. "If you would've been paying attention, I had a little protection on under my shirt. I'm a good actor." He licked his lips. "Now if you don't hurry up and pack yo shit, I'mma—."

I pushed him back and he fell on the bed. "You gon' what? Beat my ass?" I chuckled. "Can't believe I was actually in love with you."

He had this serious look on his face. "Was in love with me?"

"Yeah." My voice was now soft but still cracking. Did I really mean it? Yes, no, I don't know.

He lifted my chin up with his index finger. He stared into my eyes. "You lying." He said before chuckling.

I pushed his hand away. "No, I'm not."

"Mari, I'mma pack ya shit, but you need to stop playin wit me." He chuckled as he got off the bed. "Talkin' bout you don't love me."

"I'm not going anywhere." I folded my arms.

He got up and walked out. I heard the front door shut. He actually left. Wow, I'm actually shocked.

An hour passed before he came back. He walked in my room with suitcases.

"Um, what you doin'?" I asked as I sat up.

"Since you don't wanna move out, I'mma move in." He shrugged as he sat his bags down.

"Nigga, you have no logic whatsoever." I said, irritated. "And I don't have space for you."

"There's a big ass spot right next to you." He said before laying down next to me. "Think about how easy it will be to take care of our baby from one house."

Here he go with this 'our' shit again. It's not our, it's me. It's always been me.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, Jordan." I said as I rolled over. "Just don't say shit to me. I don't feel like dealing with your bullshit."

"I haven't been putting you through any bullshit." He had the audacity to say. "You're just being difficult."

I sat up and looked at him. "I'm being difficult?!" I questioned.

He sucked his teeth. "Man, Marianna, just take yo ass to bed."

"I will, but it's not because you said so. I'm actually tired." I said before laying down.

"Uh huh." He said before taking the remote.

***

I woke up the next morning with Jordan's arms wrapped around my waist and his head laid on my breast.

I place my hand on his head. I just started crying, but quietly so I wouldn't wake him up. I don't know what I'm doing with my life anymore.

Should we get back together? Will he really change? I think I actually wanna be with him. Not only for the baby, but for me too. I want us to raise our baby together.

The bad times we had, definitely outweighs the good times. Why I can't I just give up and walk away from him? I know y'all probably think I'm crazy, but it's easy to judge somebody else before judging yourself.

I'm tired of the pain, the crying, the constant fussing and the fighting.

He sat up and noticed I was crying. He wiped my tears away.

"What's wrong? Why you crying?" He asked before kissing my cheek.

"You. I hate you, but I love you so much." He pulled me into a hug before kissing my forehead.

"I'm sorry, Mari." He apologized as he kissed my face. "I love you, mommy."