~Existential~

Showers

(OKAY look I know this is weird and probably no one relates but me.)

You remember when you'd get up shower and only take a short shower. 20 minutes max. You'd wash you hair and body and move on. You'd be a productive and normal human being. And then at the beginning of your depression you'd start taking showers less and less. Maybe it started as every other day. And then every three days. Eventually it dwindled to once a week. You wrote it off as you were busy. It was all good you'd go back to routine soon. Then all of the sudden it dropped to once a month. Then you got really depressed because you weren't taking care of yourself. So you started taking showers again. But it just wasn't the same. You couldn't bring yourself to wash your hair or body. There was like a mental block. Then eventually the water got hotter and the showers got longer. Your skin started to go numb to the heat of the water. But the physical damage was still there. Burns, sweating, redness. And eventually you begged for the numbness. When the shower would be hitting your back but you couldn't feel it because everything was numb. No just me? Lol okay.