PRACTICE natin, syempre group tayo. Ako Yung leader. Tapos nagtanong Yung isang member natin kung Saan tayo mag papractice, tapos sabi ko sa museum. Ang saya mo nun, sabi mo maganda dun, magandang lugar pang background para sa profile mo. I'm not in the mood that time. Kumakain tayo ng lunch and I was just silent the whole time. You didn't ask like the others. Pinapatawa mo pa nga ako. Then nung papunta tayo ng museum si V lang palagi kong kausap. We never talked during the ride. Bumabalik na mood ko then palagi kong pinagtitripan si V.
We were laughing when you told me to take a picture of you. I made a face, syempre nag bibiro akong galit ako kase ang dami mo nang mukha sa phone ko. Then I took a picture of you. Stolen shots, vague, then tons of pictures.
Tapos nag practice na tayo. After a while, umulan, pero hindi malakas. So nagpatuloy tayo. After 30 minutes, sobrang lakas na talaga ng ulan kaya humanap tayo ng masisilongan. Kinuha ko payong ko then tinawag si N. Sabi ko share kami. Pero sabi niya gusto daw niyang maligo ng ulan. Kaya ikaw Yung ka share ko.
Madami tayong babae at lalaking kaklase na iisang payong lang ang gamit. But they were just beside each other walking. Unlike us, naka Akbay ka sakin then hawak ko Yung payong. Tapos hinawakan mo payong so Yung kamay ko hinawakan mo.
I felt something inside my chest. I knew that feeling. That feeling is what I hate the most. So bumitaw ako. Then Yung kamay mo nakahawak na sa bewang ko. But I acted like it's nothing.
Tapos nakakita na tayo ng masisilongan. Then you told me to take a picture of you under the rain. So I did. Then our classmates said" Sana all". Then we just laughed. After a while, nung lumakas na talaga Yung ulan, sabi mo umalis na tayo at baka maabutan pa tayo ng baha. That's what we did. Under the rain, we walked. The same position. Your ams around me while holding the umbrella.
Nung naghihintay na tayo ng Jeep, I teased our classmates saying, "uuuy. Kayo haaa. Ang sweet. Share sa iisang payong, ayiiieee." And I was really dumb kasi nakalimutan kong naka akbay ka pala sakin. Then one of our classmate answered. " kayo ang sweet. May pa akbay akbay pang nalalaman." Nagulat ako sa sinabi niya. So I said" eh kapatid niya ako eh. Baby kaya ako." Thank God you also answered," huwag niyong awayin kapatid ko. Bata yan ano ba kayo." And they just laughed. Then I said to myself. This feeling should be stopped before it gets too late. And I'm confident that I can stop this, of course, this is isn't the first time I felt this.
Then after a while, sumakay na tayo ng Jeep. I was uncomfortable kasi iniisip ko yung nararamdaman ko. You have a girlfriend, and I'm nothing compared to her. She's beautiful while I'm not. She's your ideal type, while I'm the opposite.
Then tinanong mo ako kung okay lang ba ako, kung giniginaw ba ako. I said," Oo naman ako pa!" And I felt happy. I felt that you care for me. But I immediately stopped myself remembering her, your woman.
It's really sad knowing that I can't even say this feeling to any of our friends.
I think I'll just keep this to myself. Till this feeling fades.
