Memories

-Being myself-

I know some people tell me this,
You are smart but you are lazy,
So screw it, that's what I am,
I don't act like others and don't blend in,
One time I tried to follow others,
It felt like I was lying to myself and I hate it.

There are nights I can't sleep,
Just like today, to be honest,
Thinking too much,
I woke up at three,
To start answering messages,
Start drawing a little bit,
Watching videos,
And writing this.

I can be too impulsive,
It's like giving my brain and order,
Like a printer button for printing,
And it takes a while to cancel,
Things had gone too far to stop,
Then I break a while,
And be an hour later,
It happened what the hell am I supposed to do?

One idea goes to another,
I had to break it each down like crackers,
Separating it for each stories,
People asks why do I have so many,
Because I have too many ideas,
And that's why I make a lot of stories,
Some goes unfinished,
Some is under progress,
Some are actually finished miraculously ,
Some I'll do that later,
Why do I care so much about what people say anyway?
They have one picture of an opinion,
I have the entire box of plans.

I am sorry if I offend some people,
Usually I'll try my best to make it up,
I do know I may say words that hurts,
It maybe because I am being too honest,
In fact I am afraid to lie,
Or just trying to make some memories,
I am not here forever y'know?

I am just being myself,
Because pretending sucks,
Because trying to be like others is hard,
Because I have a dream to accomplish,
Even if I feel underachieved,
Even if I will have multiples of mini goals,
I mean why should I care?
It's my dream and not theirs.