BREATHLESS | URBAN

cero.

"Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we'll ever do." - Brené Brown

→

Alexandra winced as she sipped her coffee - it was lukewarm, bitter and lacking real cream. It was a source of caffeine that she needed though, her day wasn't starting off to a great start. "Good-morning, momma." Alexandra's son Keon came into the kitchen.

"Good-morning my baby," Alexandra gave him a wet kiss on the forehead before pulling out some pans. "You have some time to eat?"

"Aw, come on mama," Keon chuckled a bit causing Alexandra to chuckle as well. "I always have time to eat, you should already know that." Keon rubbed his stomach.

"How are you holding up though momma- you look a little upset?" Keon asked.

"Boy, don't act like you don't like your momma kisses," Alexandra said, causing him to chuckle. "I'm fine though, it's nothing for you to worry about," Alex lied about being fine, all she can think about was how close the days were getting to her mother's birthday. Her mother died a few years back before Keon was born. Alex didn't know how she was going to handle that day when it came around. "How is school going for you? The coach treating you right?"

"School is going- we have a game coming up next week, so the coach is really killing us with these practices," Keon stated. "Do you think you can make it to my next game? It's going to be a big thing for me. Coach got some scouts coming to look at us."

"You know I wouldn't miss it for the world," Alexandra smiled, before placing the bacon onto the hot pan. "Just don't forget that your school work comes before basketball. I don't want you slacking in school trying to keep up with practice and all that, you already know my rules."

"I know, I know," Keon said, taking a sip from his orange juice. "There ain't no slacking on this end. I'm not trying to here you fuss with me."

Alex chuckled, causing Keon to chuckle. "You want some eggs?"

"Yes, ma'am," Keon smiled. He was such a respectful young man, Alex was so proud of the man her son was becoming. "Have you heard from pops?"

Alexandra's face slightly changed from a smile into a frown. She hasn't heard from him since he decided that the relationship wasn't working for him anymore. "No, why?" She asked.

"I tried reaching out but he just sent my call straight to voice mail. But, I ain't tripping," Keon looked down at his hands. It broke Alexandra's heart to see her son disappointed. "I'm just getting older and I'm starting to realize that I don't want to keep this grudge against him any longer. I was so mad at him for just leaving us like that but now I'm realizing that maybe it was for the better."

Keon sighed. "Pops wasn't a father to me yet you always told me to reach out, but he never thought about doing the same. So, real talk- fuck him. I don't need anything from him. You raised me into the man I am today and I love you for that momma."

"Your grandmother used to tell me when I was younger that there are two types of love in this world: the steady breeze and the hurricane," Alexandra covered the bacon and began to cook the eggs. "It hurts more to hold grudges than to forgive. The anger we hold inside damages us, nobody else. And, I get that you're upset, I'm not trying to tell you that you can't be. But, don't say fuck him because at the end of the day that is still your father and I don't want you feeling that way towards anybody-I didn't raise you to even use that type of language towards anyone. Do you understand?"

"I understand where you're coming from momma, but it's hard not to feel that way towards him," Keon stated. "Marcus wasn't there for me like I needed him. He been said, 'the hell with us' when he decided to leave us. But, with the respect that I have for you, I promise not to say that again."

"Thank you," Alexandra placed the eggs, toast and few pieces of bacon on the plate and sat it in front of Keon. "Just know that I'm always going to be here for you, no matter what happens."

"Yeah, I know," Keon ate a piece of his bacon. "I just wish pops felt the same way. But, I know that I'll always have you and that's why I can always count on you for whatever. Because I know you'll always be there to catch me when I fall."

"Always," Alexandra kissed his cheek. "Eat up though, I want you to have as much energy for school this morning."

Alexandra went into the living room, plopping down on the couch and pulling out her laptop. Alex has been spending sleepless nights searching for a new job since she was laid off from her last one. "But, momma how are you really holding up? How is this job search thing going?" Keon asked, before devouring the rest of the food on his plate.

"I'm just a little stressed out," Alex sighed. "But, this is something that I need to worry about. I don't want you worrying about what's going on with me. I got a few interviews set up so hopefully everything works out. All I can do right now is pray and hope everything falls into place."

"I'm going to always worry about you, momma," Keon sat on the couch beside Alex. "I'm your son, it's my job to make sure you're alright at all times - I know you don't really talk about grandma that much anymore but, I know that her birthday is coming up and I just wanted to make sure that you're not taking everything in all at once."

"Everything is fine," Alex smiled, rubbing Keon's cheek as he laid his head on her shoulder. "You got everything for school?"

"Okay, just making sure," Keon kissed his mother on the cheek. "I have everything. Ima head out now though."

Alex squeezed Keon's cheeks causing him to laugh a bit. The sight of him smiling always brought a smile to Alexandra's face no matter how she was feeling. Her son, Keon was her whole world and she wouldn't change the feeling of being a mother for anything. "You have a good day, I don't want to hear that you go into some type of trouble."

"Oh, I almost forgot," Keon stopped mid-way before picking up his duffel bag. "Momma, I know money is a little tight right now but can I hold fifty dollars?"

"Fifty dollars?" Alex stared at him. "Boy, what do you need fifty dollars for?"

"Well, you know after practice..." Keon said. "A few guys from the team wanted to hit this party afterward and I-"

"It's a school night," Alex said. "You know my rules, Keon. I let you do as you please but you know my rules on school nights."

"But, this is the party before the big game," Keon said, causing Alex to stare at him. "I can't just not show up. My whole team is going and I don't want to be the oddball out of the bunch. Come on mama, I don't ever ask for anything."

Alexandra sat there, thinking about an answer before speaking up. "Grab my purse."

Keon smiled before grabbing the purse from near the front door. "Thank you, momma. I really do appreciate this."

"Mhm," Alex grabbed fifty bucks from out of her wallet before handing it over towards him. "Don't spend it all at once and please promise me that you won't get yourself into trouble. You know how it is nowadays at these parties nah- I don't want you getting hurt."

Keon grabbed the money before kissing his mother's cheek. "I won't be out too late." Keon grabbed his jacket and walked out the front door. Leaving Alex being the only person in the house.

"Lord give me strength," Alex whispered to herself as she continued her job search.

→

Thanks for reading my new story, please tell me what you think of it so far. Honest feedback would help a lot. Please excuse any typos I will be editing this story very soon.

©MELANINQUEENNNNN