The Story of us

Chapter 28: Some things are better unsaid

"It's not from Alec. For Christ's sake, Ella," I sighed. "It's none of your business, anyways. Get out of my room."

She stared at me for a moment before huffing dramatically, but then she stepped out nevertheless, muttering something about how she was still certain that it was Alec. Of course, that made me remember that I hadn't even told my family I had broken up with Alec yet, mainly because I knew that if I did, they would immediately want to know why which was a story that I wasn't ready to tell all over again.

The minute I heard Ella close the door behind her, I made sure that it was locked and collapsed back onto my bed. I stared at the letter for a long time, reading the words 'for Lexi' in my head over and over again, until finally, I couldn't contain myself for any longer. I opened the envelope as carefully as I possibly could, and then began to read the message.

Lexi,

I know that this all may seem pretty overdramatic, and I know that you hate that stuff, but this is important. By now, you've finally learned the truth. And, Lexi, you may think that you're hard to read, but the thing is, I know you, and I knew that you most likely wouldn't let me explain any of this to you in person. So I decided that this would be my next best alternative.

I never meant to lie to you. That was never my intention, and I hope you know that at least. I never meant to fall in love with you either, but sometimes we meet people and they leave marks on our lives without us ever preparing for any of it. That's a lot what it was like with you. The truth is that yes, I had a fiance. Have. I don't even know what Brielle and I are anymore, but what I do know is that I'm ending it, and that was my plan before I even met you.

Things were good between us in the beginning, but we'd started fighting a lot in the past few months. And not the good kind of fights that I and you have, the kinds that let you know that at least we have something worth fighting for. The way Brielle and I fought was nothing like that. It was like we were fighting constantly, but we didn't even know what the purpose of it was. She said some pretty horrible stuff, but then again, I have to admit that I did too. And then one day, we had a really bad fight. I told her that I needed a break from her, and she yelled at me that if I walked out of that door, there wasn't going to be any coming back. And for the first time, that sounded like the most comforting thing in the world. And so I packed a bag and left, and right before I did, she threw her ring off and told me that she never wanted to see me again. I genuinely believed at that moment that we were over, and I believed that up until a week ago, but I'll get to that later.

I stayed in Florida with a friend for about a week before I came to the conclusion that I needed to go up to Boston and make things final with Brielle. But then I realized that I had absolutely no ride to get there, and my flight had been canceled. I was too desperate to end it that I told myself I wasn't going to wait for any new flights to open up or waste any new money, and so I tried to find a ride to Boston, thinking that it would only take a couple of days. And then I met you. And I know that you hated me with a passion in the beginning, but I mean it when I say that I think a part of me fell in love with you from the minute I saw you.

And maybe that sounds cheesy, probably because it kind of is, but it's hard not to be. You're special, Lex, and I mean that too. As I began to fall for you more and more every day, I was still under the impression that Brielle and I were over. I mean, she had made it pretty clear the last time I had seen her. But then, the same day that we kissed for the first time, I got a call from her. She told me that she was sorry, and she regrets everything she said and that she still wanted to be with me. That was why I pulled away from you when we kissed (even though it was what I had been thinking about practically every day) because I knew that I couldn't lie to you. You would be crushed if you found out, even though I have no intentions of getting back together with Brielle. Believe me when I say that when I get back to Boston, I'm going to end things with her. I don't love her anymore, and I haven't for a long time. Not now when I finally know what real love is. It's the kind that I have with you.