short stories

Belittled Sweetness

infatuation; an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone or something

Disclaimer: made bc i had an idea so it's not the best.

I was never opposed to opinions of any matters. I allowed everything and almost anything to flow freely through my conscious without a single inkling of denial to be registered. It gave me a carefree life, something I experienced with absolute joy. There were momentary situations where life was absolute shit, but that occurred everywhere and was an obstacle you just couldn't avoid. Those who avoided it would struggle the most, and the reluctant of acceptance wasn't something of a strong spirit, instead a weak one.

I was one of those weak guys at first, who ran his life through the bliss provided by one of nature's most delightful gifts. Sex.

It was an addiction that couldn't be avoided, and it kept the thoughts that were proven a hindrance to be locked away and left unconsumed as I devoured the tasteful nights without hesitance. You couldn't blame me, I enjoyed the thrill of watching women cave in. The directness of their body language that defied their words. The most typical we're actually one if his favorites. The fight in the beginning leading to the silky sheets that were glistening against flesh as bodies twisted.

That insurance of masculinity gave me the confidence that allowed me to get to damn far. I breathed the excitement, and perhaps I wasn't the most deep genius that woman desired when they strived to change your everyday playboy. I admit it, I was ridiculous.

College was a pleasure.

My classes were okay considering they were hours apart and I wasn't really looking forward to anything other than football which seemed like a very stereotypical boy career. I knew I wouldn't get far, I was good at what I did, but I still lacked in skills that would've made me phenomenal.

There was one class though, a class that was made unforgettable by a nuisance that I personally aimed to destroy.

The sounds of laughter that emitted from one young lady by the name of Yu Seoyoo.

Her annoying squeaky laughter made class almost extremely intolerable. It was crazy how she barely got caught when she'd sit there haunched over and constantly balling her chest out right into my ear every single fucking day. Oh how I wished I could throat-punch that bitch right back into her forsaken seat. And no matter how many times I turned around and gave her a tone full of venom, she just shrugged me off as if I was irrelevant. And that, I could not take. My ego wouldn't take the agonizing torture of being degraded by a girl who seemed like practically nothing aside from a noisy nuisance.

Days would pass, it was a never ending cycle.

I had developed a habit of turning around and solidifying her with a disgusted glare, which only fueled her kiddish like behavior. The woman simply would lean towards me and smile (thankfully it was quiet) and observe me through dark hazelnut like eyes. Our short interactions would shut her up, and I always heard a small but quiet apology that was barely uttered from her fortunately pouting lips. It was almost insane to me on how people could possibly talk to her, and I had begun to resent the people that made jokes and catered to her humor which I tended to exaggerate a lot. She wasn't constantly laughing, but when she did it almost seemed as if her positivity was rather consuming.

There was a time though, where it wasn't all that bad. She had went through the day without wheezing from some shitty joke that Lee over there made, and I had actually enjoyed the simplicity of her presence right behind me. Sometimes I could actually feel the burning stare against my head, almost as if she was attempting to gain my attention. That one time I had actually turned around, and noticed the sly but euphoric smile break out across her face as she was contoured into a positive beauty. I couldn't help it, it was contagious and I practically erupted into a grin only seconds later after seeing her expression. Cheesy it was, I never presumed myself to be so impressionable.

I had later spent that night thinking of her, as odd as it seemed anyway. It wasn't in any romantic type of way, if anything I was weirdly attracted to her vibe. Like something that I couldn't put a finger on, and it pissed me off dearly to the extent of fury. So my conclusion to my curious problem was to bed her.

It was easy enough wasn't it? I had spent my whole high school life training for a moment like this. You weren't always attracted to just anyone, and maybe her laughter would be replaced by something a little more...well...tolerable.

Though the next time I had arrived on campus for the next day, I had gone roughly through the whole day without hearing an utterance from behind me. My curiosity wasn't pleased, and I had noticed her absence almost instantly.

Silence. Thank god.

Her arrival was postponed, I spent most of my time in the class in a quiet atmosphere which had done me a great deal.

Then it became a few weeks.

Out of mere curiously, I wondered where she could've gone? Sure the silence had pleased me before, but I had begun to ache for the sound of that terrible wheeze and squeak that often followed her lips.

More time had passed. The more my whole body froze with anxiety every time I would spot her empty seat when I walked through those thick doors. Where was her stupid ass? Why the hell wasn't she showing up to school? Didn't she know that her grades were going down the drain? The woman was ridiculous, and she was pissing me off.

I began to frantically search for her appearance. I would stare at the doors for quite a time, whipping my head around to see who it was when the door creaked; only to be disappointed when some other fucker walked in.

My memories were fading, by the time the third month had passed I had already forgotten the sound of the disgusting laugh that I begged to god to hear just one more time for some sick fucking reason.

And if i'm being real with you, this isn't some romantic story if that was what you were expecting. Nothing between me and Seoyoo had ever happened. I had never seen her again, and truthfully I don't even know whether she just moved a town over or if she had completely been wiped from existence. And yeah, I still think about her from time to time although I don't expect her to walk from around the corner.

I just can't help but wonder how the hell I had become so enamored with a person I had no idea about? I couldn't fathom the capability for the feeling that was aroused whenever she crossed my mind. How she affected me so throughly with something so effortless and unintentional. I had become infatuated with a mere feeling that I no longer had ever felt ever again.