Marissa gulped as her father took out his phone, pulling something up, before showing her. It was a picture of her and Jensen after one of their later dates, looking cozy together. Jensen was smiling widely at her, his arm wrapped around her shoulder. She was looking up at him, her hand intertwined with his on her shoulder, smiling even wider than Jensen's dazzling smile.
She looked at her dad, to see him frowning at her. Marissa stabbed a piece of macaroni, her hands trembling slightly. After she brought the food to her mouth, she wrapped her hands around her glass, bring it forward to try and get her hands to stop shaking.
"See, I thought he was married, googled it, even," Vincent told her, Marissa focusing on the dark, bubbling liquid of her drink. "What are you thinking, Marissa?"
She shrugged in response, playing with her straw now. Images of her father yelling about her mother, calling her names, flashed behind her eyes, telling her that she was never going to see her again if he had anything to do with it after Mitchell, James, and Nikki had gotten away, each at different times. Still, the hit had accumulated in her father until he was taking it put on Maryann by using her. It still hurt to think about, and she felt like that teenager sitting on the couch in the living room, wishing that she could go and see her other family but trapped.
Whenever he got like this, it always reminded her of that summer and how her heart still hurt from it.
"Not only is he too old for you," Marissa wanted to remind her father that he was trying to date a woman with around the same age gap as her and Jensen but didn't. "He was happily married for a long time. You think that just goes away over the year they were separated. Especially when they have to see each other with because of the kids I know he has."
She knew it didn't. Marissa watched her father's face, knew he was talking from personal experience. He was still in love with Maryann (or the idea of her) and was dealing with the after effects of the relationship even now. And seeing her happy with every one of her more recent boyfriends always sent him into a spiral of bitterness and anger. He didn't show it as much now. When Marissa was younger, he used to spread lies about her mom's partners to get her to hate them.
The boyfriend she had after she divorced Vincent would always be the dad that Marissa longed for, until eventually he left them too, cracking Marissa's heart more. After that, the distrust Marissa had for her mother's significant other's was noticable. She barely talked to them, only observed, watching each one walk in, stick around for a couple months, then walk back out again. Until Chad.
"I don't want to talk about this with you," Marissa told him, trembling. She was thinking about Jensen and how much she missed him. In the back, more dark part of her mind she was wondering if him and Danneel were getting cozy in their once shared living room, but pushed the thought away. She trusted Jensen. And God, could she have gone for one of his hugs right now. To feel warm and safe, instead of feeling the icy stare her father was giving her from across the table.
"He's also one of the most attractive guys I've ever seen," Vincent told her, reaching out to console her before he delivered the blow. Marissa moved her hands away, the voices of her siblings screaming at her to shove away from the table and walk away. Get out of there and not listen to his crap anymore. But, she stayed planted, trying to will the tears stay from her eyes. Somehow, she would never not stay and listen to her father putting her down to make himself feel superior. "Why do you think he's going to stay with someone like you?"
Marissa shrugged again, lamely picking at her macaroni. She swallowed, trying to get the cotton out of her mouth. With a sigh, she decided that he was done talking now, and wiped her hands on her napkin, checking her phone. There were several messages from her siblings telling her not to listen to Vincent's shit, her mom telling her she loved him, the groupchat with the Supernatural cast discussing something about an egg, Cleo telling her she had Disney movies and comfort food ready back at her apartment, and Jensen with a simple hey.
They had talked every day almost every chance they could through texting. The man sent her reaction gifs of himself like he said Jared and him did, making her laugh each time. They talked about their lives, interests, everything and anything and Marissa really felt like she was getting to know him. Her heart clenched and she missed him more than ever now.
"I have to go, Cleo has an emergency with her fridge again," Marissa lied, standing up and pocketing her phone. The dress she was wearing swayed around her legs before settling, Marissa glad it was long enough to hide her most recent tattoo. Her dad would hound her about that, too. "I'll see you."
Marissa walked out of the restaurant trying not to cry. Pulling up the text from Jensen, she asked if she could call him. The response was she could do so later, but he was at the park with his dogs, JJ, and Jared's family and couldn't escape to talk to her privately. Marissa asked for a text when she could, and quickly made it into her car, which was sitting on the other side of the parking lot outside of the restaurant.
In the cover of her car, Marissa started to cry.
NOTE: true story; I had to call my dad about insurance for my car so that I could drive it and he went on a rant about how my mom didn't help him pay for my sister's car and its insurance (how does that relate to me btw) and he kept on making me feel terrible and unloved because he always brings up my sister whenI'm asking for stuff like that and always asks how fair life is and by the end of the call I was sobbing so hard Icould barely talk and my mom had to take the phone ((:
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