I have Pain, yes I've been hurt. But I can't let anyone see my pain. I have to hide it because if I don't then they'll call me weak. I can't show my emotions because then I'm vulnerable, I can't let them get to me. I can't show who I really am, if I do they'll use me, they'll take advantage of me. So no I haven't been myself, I hold everything in, I don't cry anymore. My mind has trained me "suck it up" it tells me "get over it" he demands. I do as I'm told. But inside I'm crying. It doesn't show on the outside because I hide it, I act strong, like I don't care, and like I'm happy. So for now I'll obey him, I'll lock my emotions up and throw the key away. I won't let them know I'm dying inside. I'll keep my walls up. That's my only option. If I don't they'll hurt me. I can't take anymore pain, I'm afraid my heart will die. Then I'll be broken inside, I'll be emotionless, and that's what I'm fearful of.
