Imagine you've been married to Jinyoung Park, the CEO of JYP entertainment for over 3 years. You love him so much but lately your relationship has been difficult and you're not quite sure you can do it anymore.
Your hands kept twirling the same piece of hair over and over again, anxiously waiting for your husband to come home. You checked the clock for what must have been the 100th time. 10:27pm and he was still nowhere to be found. "Goddamnit Jinyoung" you thought to yourself. You decided that you would only wait another hour for him before going to sleep, although you didn't know whether you would be able to. Your mind was racing and your heart heavily pounded against your ribcage. You tried your best to distract yourself with a movie that was on but your mind kept wandering. You had to speak to him.
You had known Jinyoung for almost 2 years before you decided to get married. Some could argue that the pair of you rushed into it but it was the best thing to do. At first your relationship was nothing more than casual but your feelings quickly developed. Soon you found that you loved him, and he loved you too, but in order for you two to avoid a scandal and comfortably spend time together you had to get married. The wedding had been one of the best days of your life. He had paid for everything, of course, refusing to let you pitch in even a single penny, just like the early days of your relationship when he would call you his princess and lavishly spoil you. He paid for the nicest dress and venue, and the day was a joyous occasion filled with smiles and top-quality entertainment from members of his company like that beautiful man who he called junior and that group of boys who spat straight fire. Dancing your first dance as a couple to the angelic sound of the beautiful Jeongyeon Yoo's voice was the most magical moment of your life. You thought about it every time you saw the photos from that day that were proudly hung up, dressed in silver frames in the corridor of your penthouse apartment. The only downside to that day was the fact that Jinyoung had invited his rival YG, although he later explained that he had to invite him otherwise the press would start drama. That and the fact that the man you had married then was nothing like the man you were married to now.
Your life as a married couple started off wonderfully. For the first 18 months, you were having the time of your life. You guys regularly had romantic dinner dates and went on spontaneous trips to gorgeous tropical locations. The press loved the two of you together, but the flashes of the cameras didn't even bother you as long as you were with Jinyoung. Good times don't last forever though, and soon things started to go downhill. You already knew that as the founder of one of the biggest entertainment companies in South Korea, Jinyoung would have a lot on his plate, and in the first 18 months, he was able to balance things well. However, once he became involved with a new upcoming project, he became increasingly preoccupied, leaving for work before the sun had come up and coming back home in the dead of night. You were barely able to speak to him, but there was one Sunday night where you briefly saw him before retiring to bed. You were planning to talk to him about how you couldn't deal with him not being around, but before you could open your mouth he explained that he was sorry for being distant, reassuring you that he would be around all the time once this project was completed. You saw the tired look in his eyes and melted slightly, the pang in your chest growing stronger. He was quite clearly stressed out, but the company was his life, and you had to let him do what he had to and trust that things would go back to normal.
That was over a year ago. Once the project had been completed, Jinyoung visibly perked up, the spring in his step returning, but he still wasn't around as much anymore. There were no dates, no holidays, no days spent inside cuddling on the sofa. There were occasions where he would plan things for the two of you to do, only to excuse himself to go to work at the last moment. You just wanted to enjoy a nice dinner with your husband without the buzzing of his phone whisking him away and leaving you to take the leftovers home. It didn't take long for you to grow exhausted. What was the point of being in a relationship if you couldn't remember the last time you sat down and had a proper conversation. You were sick of it, sick of the days spent being stuck in the huge white apartment, with its cold marble tiling and large glass windows. You'd spent countless nights alone sitting by the windows in the darkness, staring out at the blinking lights of the city. It made you feel so small and insignificant, staring out at the lively city from this high up, and that feeling was made even worse by the fact that you had no one there to console you. You had given up everything to be with him, and you were getting nothing in return. The flowers Jinyoung would get his secretary to send to you during his business trips could not make up for the fact that you had left your family, friends and career to be with him. Due to his status and how marrying him had put you in the spotlight, you were isolated from your past friends as they didn't like the idea of hanging out with someone who got their photo taken every few minutes. You hadn't spoken to your parents ever since you announced the engagement as they didn't like the idea of you being with such a famous person. Part of you understood that they were angry out of concern for your well-being - they didn't want you to be overwhelmed by celebrity life. But in their anger, they had pushed you away, and you were too much of a coward to go back and try to rekindle your relationship with them. You didn't want to admit that they were right, that the pressure and the stress of this relationship was a little too much for you to deal with at times, despite the fact that you knew they would welcome you back with open arms eventually. Before your relationship, you were on your way to becoming a lawyer, but you'd had to put everything on hold to be with Jinyoung, and now no law firm would accept you, years after graduation with no proper experience. Jinyoung had got you modelling jobs to fill your time, and more companies wanted to work with you due to your delicate features that contrasted with the smooth curves of your body. While your new job had helped you to meet interesting people and distract yourself for a while, it just didn't feel right. The time spent in between jobs, staying at home for hours with nothing to do but listen to the suffocating silence of your home, was almost unbearable. You couldn't take it anymore.
