hey so um i don't know where to start this but i guess i'll figure that out, right? yeah right. wow i'm off to a great start. ANYWAY, i have depression. and it's bad. and terrible. and i hate it. jil - you've made it so much better. i get triggered by the smallest of things which meant that this account got dark for a quick second. of course right away you helped me through it which just reminded me of why i had this account in the first place.
1. so nobody steals this killer username.
2. most of all because i love you.
so yeah i logged back in here for what i thought was going to be the last time (not because i don't love you, because i don't love myself) and i saw your message. you don't even know whose running this account and yet you're so kind to me. i love you for that and everything else you've done for me. so i guess this is my way of saying i'm not quitting this account. never.
i feel like if i quit then i'm telling myself i gave in. to my depression and self hatred and to all of the bad thoughts that are constantly in my mind. you wouldn't want me to be thinking those things though and i need to remind myself of that. that's why i'm not quitting this account. cause i need to show you how much i love you. this keeps me sane.
