Last week was my first day of high school. Even though I had my twin sister there, Kyla, she had at least some friends. As for me I had none. It's always been that way. I was the outcast gay kid that no one liked. I would get bullied and then Kyla would have to swoop in and save the day. Every single time I would ask her to stop because it makes me look weak and that I should look tough and like a man, but she never did. She always thought that I couldn't fight my own battles. I'm glad though because honestly because I don't think I can either.
My parents are so pushy and want me to make friends so badly that they kick me out of the house most nights. On those days I usually end up tagging along with Kyla because that's my only choice. What I wish my parents understood was that it's not that I don't want to be around other people, it's that other people don't want to be around me. If anyone is caught hanging out or even around me, people will think that they also are a freak. Because of my previous statement, no one comes near me except for Kyla and like one of her friends.
No one understands. I haven't told my parents, that I'm gay. I've tried don't get me wrong but they just won't listen. They think that I should be the perfect child just like Kyla. Everything is always about Kyla. How she's such a good and pure child. And then there's me. My parents call me their "everlasting disappointment." I've always hated that name because it's just a daily reminder that I'm not good enough but they're not the only ones who think that. While everyone is always talking about how "unfair" their parents are because they wouldn't let them get the new gaming console I just listen and think in my head "Oh boy. You think that's bad?! Wait till what you hear what I have to say!" But then I never say it. It feels like I never say anything that's on my mind. I've never really thought of myself as shy but I guess I never really thought it through either.
The whole school day was full of firsts like, having my very first locker, (Yah in elementary and middle school they never assigned us lockers we always got "cubbies". It was retarded.) Being in my very first school club, (the debate club which is a horrible fit because I hate to talk but whatever.) and eating in the library because no one wants to sit with me. (I know that we already addressed this topic but this.... This is just sad.) My schedule was... okay. I don't really know who was in all of my classes because I slept through most of them. Come to think of it that might be why I failed like ALL my classes last year.
I've never really thought much of school because if us kids really need to know something then just tell us and stop teaching us things that we will never even use in life. I just don't understand why they have to put us through like twelve years of school when we could reduce all of the content to things that we will actually use and learn it all in like two or three years. That's the thing that I don't get about schools and teachers. Teachers have to deal with all kinds of shit and barely even get paid. Like what the hell is that about? At the end of the day (Thank god!) I ride home on the bus which I can tell you now is miserable. I'm not looking forward to doing that for the rest of the year. Actually I'm not looking forward to anything for the rest of the year. But then I met him.
VOUS LISEZ
The Ocean Between Us
Roman d'amourTwo teens that met on Facebook now text almost every night and watch movies with each other over the phone. When Blake and Karter find out that there is an ocean between them that doesn't stop them from falling in love.
