i havent told you that i love you yet, i guess i don't want you to think i'm temporary. someone saying they love you becomes whitesound so fast. i do not want to be another person you forget the name of. i want to be the girl who wouldn't say i love you, and would talk about colours as emotions and how scary the left side is. things only you would know, and you know you're the only one.
not that i think i'm better than you, but i'll take it from here.
nice people scare me. you're lavender and soft blues, like the beach at my get-away house in south america. i don't talk about that because i hold it close to home, because the more you talk about things the less special they become.
i'm not scared of you dying. no that's not what i meant. i meant, he's not going to take you. nothatstilldoe s n tmak e sense. your eyes don't bleed when i look at you and that makes me feel safe. everyone i care for he takes away, he makes me scared. i am not scared of you. you don't become blurry and give me flight or fright syndrome. when i close my eyes around you i don't see death and wind. it's just, nothing. but a peaceful nothing! it's not the panicky orange nothing.
