Save Me

Chapter 15: Apologies

" Are you going to follow me in my room too," I said sarcasm laced in my voice.  I turned around and saw that Ricky was blushing. Awwww.

" Did I make you blush," I said in a baby voice. He turned even redder shade than before.

" So where do you work?" Ricky asked hiding his face in his hands. I laughed an turned to go into my room.

" Hey I didn't get an answer," Ricky shouted. I was still laughing a little. I turned to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I looked horrible I had mascara running down my face. I looked like I was hit by a car. I hoped in the shower and started singing Voices by motionless in white.

Voices, In my head again
Trapped in a war inside my own skin
They're pulling me under (Go)I've swallowed myself but the fever remains
I'm numb to the pleasure but still feel the pain
If I showed you, my soul, would you cover your eyes?
If I told you the truth would you tell me to lie?
I keep it all inside because I know the man is everything but kindVoices, In my head again
Baiting me in a war I can't win
I can hear them now
Trapped in a game inside my own skin
I don't know myself anymore
They're pulling me under
Voices, VoicesAs I walk through this valley of shadows and death
I curse not the wicked, I praise not the blessed
If I told you the truth, you'd beg me to change
If fear were a currency, you'd own the bankVoices, In my head again
Baiting me in a war I can't win
I can hear them now
Trapped in a game inside my own skin
I don't know myself anymore
They're pulling me underI don't want to live
So callous and frozen
Ugly and hopeless
I don't want to live forever
I just want to live right now
You can't take it from me
Voices in my head again
Head againVoices in my head again
Baiting me in a war I can't win
I can hear them now
Trapped in a game inside my own skin
And I don't know myself anymore
They're pulling me under
Voices
(They're pulling me under)
Voices
They're pulling me under
Voices, voicesI keep it all inside because I know the man is everything but kind
I keep it all inside because I know the man is everything but kind

When I was done I continued to sing Mr. Doctor Man walking back into my room. Looking for an outfit to wear. I decided to wear black ripped skinny jeans and a black tank top with the Palaye Royale logo on it. I straightened my hair. Man, I should dye my hair again. When I was finished I put on my black combat boots on and grabbed my black jacket, for the way home. running down the stairs I started to sing Morticians Daughter. I grabbed my bag from the mudroom and went to the kitchen and grabbed an apple and a monster. Lunch is what I call it.  About to leave when a hand was on my shoulder. I elbowed the person. 

" Ow, what was that for?" I looked behind me and was Chris motionless behind me.

"Sorry force of habit," I said looking at the damage I did. Nothing bad a bruise maybe but other than that nothing to worry about.

"I heard you sing and I wonder who it was."  I thought that they were all asleep. damnit, curse me and my bad luck.

" Well thank you and I have to get to work," I said trying to open the door only for it to be close. What is he thinking I have to be at work in like 15 minutes. 

"Chris I have to be at work," I said with a little anger in my voice. 

" I want to say that you have amazing voice and I am having another concert here and I think that you should come with us," Chris said looking at me with puppy dog eyes. How could someone say no to him?

"Maybe and can I leave now," I said getting a little annoyed. I needed to get to work.

" Oh, and when can I get that tattoo that you promised for me." He said looking at me with a dangerous looking his eyes.

" Right now if you let me get to work," I said trying to open the door. It opened. finally.

" Follow me and don't be slow," I said getting on my bike while he was getting in his car. I was taking the back roads the one that no one uses so the faster I can go. He already made me late. I drove out of the driveway. I  pushed through the street until we were to the backroads. I went to the fastest I could. I didn't even slow down for the turns. I was going to be late. We were there in 6 minutes. 

"I was going 130 mph and I still wasn't able to reach you." I rolled my eyes and saw Liam outside the doors.

"You were going to make me late," I said walking past Liam. And into the shop. I checked in. Went back to the waiting area.

" I am sorry Kat I never wanted to do those things to you but my brother wanted me to follow him and I did I didn't want to be the one to be picked on," Liam said looking at me like he was going to cry. What the fuck was is he think right now. He didn't want to be picked on. I am 1 Inch on the cool left before I rip his head off. He was breaking my bones and he calls that picked on. What the fuck. I will show him picked on 

" So you think being picked on is bones breaking and telling me that I will never be good enough and that my sisters death was my fault. Never wanting to go out with my brother because I was scared that you guys were going to be there like luke was when I was at the mall. Do you think that I liked going home to see that I have to try my damnedest to help my brother even though I will never be the motherly figure that he needs and feeling like I was nothing and I was making it worse? You ruined my life. So take that apologie and shove it so far up your ass. Because It will take a miracle for me to forgive you." I said looking at him with the evil eye that I give people before I will kill them. I walked out of the shop. Angry with myself why the hell didn't I beat their asses before all of this. I punched the wall trying not to take my anger out on people. I punched and punched the wall until It hurt.

" What would you like to have today," I said in the nicest voice that I could come up with right now. 

" I would like to have I was crying on Saturdays night below my jaw and chin," Chris said as I was sketching the thing that he wanted.

" Who the hell did you beat," Chris asked. I shrugged.

" More like a wall, I wish it was the person that I was dealing with," I said as I finished. Cutting out the outline. I placed it on his jaw and looked where I should put it. 

" So what was the conversation about," Chris asked to wait for me to answer. But I didn't know how to answer.

" We were talking about the abuse that happened and he wanted to say sorry. Like he thought that I would forgive him for what he did to me." I said while grabbing my ink. 

" No more talking or I will mess up," I said getting in position to start. He tilted his head back. I started and continued. I hummed Eternally Yours. I was almost done. Would he stop moving?

" We are done. there is a mirror behind you." I said while cleaning everything up. 

"Fuck, Shit, fuck," I said as I was trying to take out the needle. Why did it spring out like that? I looked at the tattoo gun and there was a rubber band missing. It probably snapped.

" Hey, are you okay," Chris asked and I nodded and walked to the bathroom to clean my hand. I wasn't that bad. But damn did that hurt. While I was cleaning it I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door to find who I would least expect. 

 Sorry for the cliffhanger I just couldn't help myself. lol

please check out One of a kind by Zoa Strohbehn