Augustus

.5

It wasn't that she owned multiple cats, it's that she was so damned crazy about this one cat. His name was Augustus and Colleen, his owner, the crazy lady, insisted I referred to him as such until she gave up on correcting my many mistakes.

Pussy Willow loved me. I'd say that pretentious little shit loved me more than Colleen, if we're being honest. It's only because I fed him that gross wet food, you know, the cat equivalent to McDonald's. Boy, did it drive her wild when she would come home from tour and he'd great her for two seconds before sticking his tail in the air and strutting right over to me. I'd really ham it up too, I'd squat down to him and coo, "it's okay, bud, I love you, I'll be back soon." He'd scream at me like he knew we were both getting what we want. I'd get the satisfaction of annoying Colleen and he'd get her to feed him more.

Truthfully, I didn't know Colleen very well. All I knew was that her house was fucking humongous and she traveled a lot, which is why I always needed to cat-sit for her. She keeps hiring me specifically because, like I said, the cat loved me. I don't mind it at all, after all, she paid pretty well and staying at her house was as good as any vacation.

Also, she was hot -- but that's not for here.