Late night thoughts even though it's only 9:43 at night

Night 1; meta-inception is meta

Don't you just hate it when you go to sleep and you dream that a man (you're also a guy) is going to cut off one portion of you and you think to yourself 'Oh balls, here we go' and then you realize you were thinking aloud and the guy just stares at you with a meat cleaver in hand, and finally sighs and says "f***ing weirdo." And raises his meat cleaver, and Wham...!
You wake up. You fell out of bed. You gasp, sweat drops rolling down your brow, you put your hand to your crotch, and you can't feel anything. You start to panic, but lift your hand, and poke it with the other. You realize you slept on your arm, and it's asleep. You go to stand up, but a pressure on your boin-loins is still there. You quiver in fear. A chill runs down your spine, you look down, and there Satan is, feelin' up yo junk. He then says "nah, there still there." And then...!
You jolt up in bed. It's almost as if Satan's hand had left an imprint on yo pee-pee. You realize it's just you having to use the bathroom. You get out of bed, head to the bathroom and sit down on the toilet. You close your eyes and hear "do you mind?" And your eyes pop open. You look down, and see a pair of eyes glaring up at you. You freeze in fear. "I'm... I'm sorry." You murmur. "Get your dick outta ma face." The creature says. And you listen. You stand up, put your boxers back on, and another chill runs down your spine. You don't own a single pair of boxers. You hear footsteps outside the door. It opens, and a guy, fully f***in' in the buff waltzes in. "Oh, babe, those are mine." You faint. When you wake up...
Your still in bed. What did you think was gonna happen? You don't truly know what the actual flying, subspecies of the genus f***ad***bag is going on. You begin to question your sexual preference. You also question many other things like, why is it 6:00 at night and why the house is gon- hoooooly s*** on a t**t! The house is gone! There you are, mr. I-sleep-in-the-buff-my-shlong's-getting-cold jonson, (no, that's not your name) sitting up in bed, (there's no covers) and the house is gone! Like... where's the walls!? Where's the roof?!?!?!  Where's the hope of waking up?!?!?!?!?
Oh wait. You just did.
You look around. Everything is fine. You sigh, and stand up out of bed. Your stomach growls.
You make your way to the fridge.
You open the door... and it's f***ing empty!!! Your head spins. You give up every hope left of leaving this inception-like jok- i mean uhh... nightmare. (Totally was the term I was looking for.)
And you wake up on the couch. You look to the television. Inception's credit scenes are rolling on the screen. You then realized you slept through the last half. You got up to the point where the concept is in your head, then it kinda got into mind-f***ery, and your brain was like, "mmmh, naaaaaah." And you fell asleep. You think to yourself, 'man. I just made my mind make a meta joke.' and you shrug it off. You then say aloud to yourself, "it's probably fine. I doubt anyone died." And go on with your day?

*author's note; wonder why it ends with a question mark? Read the first line again... GET MIND-BLOWN