Never

"Never smile in pictures." They told him. It's not manly. "Do not cry!" It makes you look weak. Never let anyone know the chaos that lives among the Desmond in your head. Don't tell them you love them. Always provide and never complain. Do not let yourself be vulnerable. Don't talk about your feelings. Don't let your daughter know it hurts when she doesn't want you to tuck her in. Make yourself invisible. Wake up, go to work before your kids roll out of bed. Come home after they are asleep. No days off, no breaks and no vacations. Make sure food is on the table and clothes lay on their backs.
Your only escape is that Marlboro you inhale as you sit in the dark contemplating everything you were taught. But don't think to much about it and never question the ideals aloud. And what do you get from this. You did everything right but I all went wrong. A divorce and you're kids on the weekends. And they don't even want to go. They were told it's all you're fault. You never wanted to go on date nights. Never wanted to travel. You weren't enough. You were wrong. Every ideal you were taught left you stranded and alone.
And now all the thought come rushing back. Just because you're told something is morally correct does not make it your truth.