Divorced, Desperate, and Delicious

Chapter 23

Lacy’s mother pushed past the plumber and stopped right in front of Lacy. “Did you know you have your robe on inside out?”

“Yes. I know,” Lacy said, trying hard not to scream.

“I’m not sleeping with her,” the plumber told Kathy.

Sue started chattering about Heaven-only-knew-what, and Lacy had the urge to clap her hands over her ears. “Silence!” she yelled. Everyone complied but her mother.

Her mother’s words rang out loud and clear. “I thought you were sleeping with Jason Dodd.”

“With whom?” a voice boomed from the living room.

“With Jason Dodd,” her mother repeated, turning to look at the man moving into the hall from the living room. “Who are you?”

“Oh my God!” Sue grabbed Lacy’s elbow. “Why didn’t you tell me you were sleeping with him? I mean, at least you could have told me.” Now Sue’s voice held jealousy, and Lacy wanted to fall to the soda-soaked, soggy paper-towel-laden floor and have a good cry.

“She’s sleeping with whom?” Jason Dodd repeated, then his gaze shifted to Sue and he smiled. “Hi. We met—”

“Well, I didn’t actually see them doing it,” Lacy’s mother continued, her glare super-glued to Peter. “Unlike some people, they didn’t do it in front of a video camera. But they did have two boxes of condoms. And I’ll bet she enjoyed every one of them.”

“Stop it!” Lacy snapped. “Stop this right now.” When she had everyone’s attention, she turned a complete circle, wet paper towels squishing under her bare feet. “Just for the record, I know I have my robe on inside out and there is not one guy in this room with whom I’ve slept in the last year.”

“I didn’t sleep with her last year either,” the plumber told Kathy.

And then the chatter began all over again.

“Stop!” Lacy called out. She turned to the one person she wanted gone first “Peter. Get out of my life.”

As Peter moved for the door, Lacy turned to the plumber. “Mail me the invoice. Good-bye.” She waved him to the door.

The plumber glanced back at Kathy and said, “I’ll call you.” Then he followed Peter.

Lacy swung around to face her mother. “It was nice to see you, Mom. Now leave.”

Her mother huffed rather loudly. “Call me tonight,” she said, and peevishly added, “We need to talk about you seeing Peter.” Then she tossed her purple shawl over her shoulder and left.

Lacy took a deep breath and faced Sue and Kathy. “Let me make this clear: I haven’t had sex with anyone that either of you has remotely thought about having sex with. Now, go pee if you must, then go, and I’ll call you later.”

Sue and Kathy skipped the potty break and started for the door. Wiping her sweaty palms on her inside-out robe, Lacy turned to Jason Dodd. He watched Sue and Kathy walk out, his gaze mostly on Sue.

When the door shut, he faced Lacy and grinned. “Two boxes of condoms, huh? I bet I was good.”

* * *

The sound of Jason calling his name brought Chase scrambling to unlock the bedroom door.

“Hey.” Chase stepped back. Jason, a smile widening his face, walked into the bedroom. “Did you hear any of that?” He glanced around, focusing on the unmade bed.