Wimp | ✓

Chapter 10

[PAUL]

Travis and I were in the mall together getting some things for the pool party he had planned. We were both in casual clothes — pale blue jeans and random tees. We were currently picking out things for a BBQ, but my mind wasn't really on the meat Travis was getting out from the freezer. I was thinking about how rowdy the place Travis had rented for the party would be. I haven't seen most of his friends in ages, and maybe a part of me was a bit anxious. They weren't my friends, and I never really got to know them much since Travis was on his way to graduating when we started going out.

I'd voiced my concerns to him when he was in my room the other day. He had told me things would work out, and if I really hated being around them he would drive me back home and stay with me.

"I like staying with you better anyway," he had said in an off-handed way. I had laughed too, but I would be lying if I said my insides didn't feel warm as my cheeks burned from his comment. I liked Travis a lot and learning that he liked me just as much always made my day.

I had told Alex what Sam said. He just frowned a bit, looking away before he continued talking to Chris. I'm not sure Sam's apology meant much to him, but it was a little disheartening to see that he hadn't changed much. They were both going to meet at the pool party, and I hoped they'd sort things out.

Chris's sister started interacting with Alex a bit more. He seemed surprised by that, but I could spot the glimmer in his eyes from time to time. When she left to head back home early I the morning Alex asked after her when he got up. I'm not sure what happened, but Chris probably had something to do with their bettered less petty relationship.

"Why are you thinking about?" Travis' question brought me out of my thoughts. I blinked, realizing that he was done selecting the packs of meat, and was now just staring at me as he held on to the shopping cart. I muttered 'nothing' under my breath before running a hand through my dark hair. Travis just sighed before giving me a small smile. I've been spacing out a lot lately, and I think Travis knew it had to do with the upcoming party.

Travis looked away from me, staring into the distance with a thoughtful look on his face. "I think we're done here, should we leave?" he asked, turning to face me. I blinked, looking away when I realized I had been staring at him. I couldn't help it. It was just hard to comprehend that I was really dating him. It's been two years, but I can't forget looking at him from a safe distance and just getting wound up and sad.

Travis has never asked me how long I've liked him. I've liked him since I was a sophomore. I guess walking past the practice field and being able to look one person in the eye (him) without being frightened played a part in it. I'd watch him from a distance ­— hang around the practice field before I started my walks home. Travis didn't know I existed then. Travis didn't know I was that one small kid that sat in the audience during school games just to see him. Travis didn't know I was that random gay kid that got outed during sophomore year because someone searched my phone.

Travis didn't know any of that. I had been invisible to him, and it still stunned me that I woke up to him beside me most days than not now. Sometimes I wonder if I'm daydreaming. I used to daydream a lot back in high school.

"Paul? Is something wrong?" I looked up, realizing I haven't answered his question yet. Travis' dark blonde brows were knitted into a small concerned frown, and his blue-green eyes were looking me up and down like he would suddenly figure out what was going on in my head. I smiled a bit, shaking my head before walking over and taking a hold of the cart instead.

"It's nothing," I said touching some things in the cart.

"We could watch a movie if you want," I said, answering Travis' question from before. I didn't really want to watch one. Travis and I had very different tastes, but as long as I got to hang around him for a little longer, I guess I don't mind. I watched as a goofy grin took form on his face, and soon he was chatting on to me as we left the store for his car in the parking lot. We moved the stuff we bought to the back seat, and Travis headed for the driver's seat while I sat in the passenger seat up front. He didn't really care much about music, so I messed with the radio all I wanted.