Lost within myself

Past

I woke up the next day to find a ray of sunlight spread across my patchwork quilt which lay on top of my springy bed. After the dull weather, even the slightest bit of sunshine was a good start to the day.

I slipped out of my bed realizing that Saturday was finally here and the tiresome week had flown by. I reached over to the dusty sink, the lukewarm water flooding out of the half rusted, metal tap that I turned on.

I washed my pale face and brushed my blonde hair into a messy ponytail and tied it off with a black hair tie. I stared at myself in the mirror, its edges cracked and smeared with filthy bits of dust, and wiped my face with a linen towel.

I headed off towards the cupboard that stood in the corner of my small dorm room. As it  creakily opened, particles of dust started circling in the air.

I pulled out a yellow full sleeved top from a wonky shelf and a pair of jeans. I quickly got dressed and went downstairs, the smell of old carpet making my nose wrinkle. 'This school really needs to be refurnished,' I thought.

I poured a glass of cold milk and placed French toast on my plate and sat down at the empty table. I sluggishly drank my milk and was about to munch a piece of my toast when I saw a shadow from the corner of my eye approaching me. 

Startled, I looked up to see Lucas pushing the chair back and taking a seat. "Aah, hello, um I just thought, aah..., you know," he stuttered and shrugged his shoulders.

" Listen you can sit down whenever you like, I'd love it for someone to sit with me, I mean it would be a pleasure," I told eating a piece of my toast which by then became cold.

"So, why have you come to this school?" He asked with a mouthful of  egg. I froze and dropped the last of my toast, and thought for a moment. I felt an urge to tell yet I didn't want to. I looked up and began...

"I lost my parents at the age of four and since then my grandma took care of me. She was my only family, she was a kind-hearted lady and took care of me with all she could. Although, ten years later she had a heart attack a-and within seconds she was gone. I then decided to make my way here and at least complete my education," I said mournfully, water filling in my hazel eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just wondering and-
"Oh don't be sorry, it's not your fault anyways, I just wish I knew how my parents died, all my grandma ever told me was they died near a wooden door that was sealed with iron bars at a lonely place. She doesn't know the name of it though, it's a real shame."

"So how do you pay your fees,"
"I use the last of what's left of my grandmas, it's real hard work you know, selling all her stuff and some of mine and taking money out of the bank, using every cent wisely and, wait why did you come here?" I asked in curiosity.

"Oh well my stories the complete opposite to yours actually, my parents both hated me the second I was born. They took care of me till I was ten with tremendous misery and grief and then passed me over to my druggy uncle who cared only about himself. He made me work day and night as if I was a slave and asked me to buy all the alcohol he could afford. After two years he told my parents that I was completely useless and asked them to put me somewhere else, and that's why I'm here. I've been here for a year now but I'm assuming that you are new,"

"I can't believe that your parents did this to you, and yes I am new, I joined two months ago and I haven't really been liking this place much. But it's the only place where I can afford a stay and I can't really go anywhere else," I told in a muffled tone.

"True, well we better get going, its not like Saturdays a full day off, we have to go for our physical exercise class that apparently will help us,"

We got out of the common room and headed towards a small passageway that then led into an empty, cold room. We stood and listened to Lucas's watch ticking in the background as a bunch of kids thronged into the small room. Mr Fillet was walking over, his usual fake smile spreading across his wrinkled face.

"Hurry up, jumping, hopping, star jumps, you know the routine, lets go," he yelled standing on the side staring at a brown leather book. It's title was just visible to make out from the chaos of students jumping in mid air.

I suddenly realized what it said, I stopped jumping at once, the eye-catching picture on the front, carved deeply into the book made me feel strange as if it were familiar- and then it came to me, it all made sense and I felt a spark light up within me.