New Beginning, Familiar Ends

1

You see when you have any type of disorder or just not understanding parents or teachers, you get used to being disappointed.

It becomes a cycle and like everything else in the world, you get used to it. You get used to never having any friends, never being invited anywhere, not getting any treatments, feeling like shit, and oh yeah the, "Why me?" Thing you ask yourself everyday.

You don't want others pitty, but you want them to care. The thing is though, they don't get the difference. They don't get that when they tell you that they are sorry, or saying I feel horrible for you; it infuriates us.

You see whenever I go into school they always tell me that they are so proud of me. It embarrasses me. Image if you were crying in the school parking lot cause you can't walk and teachers are threatening to get you a wheelchair or call 911. And then you walk in like they ask and they just say in front of EVERYONE, "I am so proud of you."

And I get that getting a wheelchair cause I can't walk or calling an ambulance cause I can't walk is not technically a threat, but I HATE having attention drawn to me so telling me that is not gonna get me out of the car. It will only make me stay there and hate you forever.

People are trying to help and stuff like that, but they move to fast and don't try to even ask me how I feel. They say that they just want to help me. Fine, I'm down for that, but at least ask what I am CAPABLE, not WANT, CAPABLE, of doing and I'll do it.