Arctic Heart [#Wattys2018 Winner]

Chapter 18

My eyes slightly widened in surprise. She knew!

Well, I knew that she was Jace's best friend but I didn't expect Jace to tell her everything, especially what's in between us right now.

I stared at her and tried to decipher her expression. She was telling me that she was happy for us, but her expression was showing otherwise. Iba ang kanyang sinasabi kaysa sa ipinapakita niya.

"Jace likes to talk about you," she told me.

Mas lalo man lang akong nagulat at hindi makapaniwala dahil sa kanyang binitawang salita. Madalas akong ikwento ni Jace sa kanya?

"I know everything. Simula noong high school pa lang kayo, noong umalis ka at hanggang ngayon," sabi niya. "Jace was actually in denial for years about his feelings for you, and I accepted that. Mas gusto ko na ring paniwalaang wala nga siyang nararamdaman para sa'yo."

Kinagat ko ang aking ibabang labi at parang ayoko nang marinig pa ang mga susunod niyang sasabihin. Alam ko na ang gusto niyang sabihin at hindi niya na kailangan pang isatinig ang mga iyon. Tunog pa lang ng kanyang boses at kung paano niya simulan ang kanyang pananalita ay alam na alam ko na.

The sound of her voice was broken that imitated her heart that was also broken. I can feel the pain dripping on every word that she was spilling from her lips.

"I will not lie nor keep the truth because you deserve know, Zarina," she said.

She heaved and released a deep exhale before she stared straight at my eyes, preparing for a very hard confession.

"I like him," she confessed.

Parang nahulog ang aking puso dahil sa kanyang pag-amin. Nasasaktan ako para sa kanya pero nangangamba rin ako para sa aking sarili.

When Jace told me that he only sees Isha like his sibling, a very close friend or best friend, made me complacent. But hearing Isha's confession, shattered that complacency and made me feel completely threatened.

"I like Jace so much, Zarina." She made it clearer for me.

Bumagsak naman ang tingin ko sa aking lamesa. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat kong sabihin.

She suddenly let out a slight chuckle. "I can see that you're actually thinking deeply of what I just told you. Wala ka naman dapat ikabahala roon," sabi niya at muli akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kanya. "Gusto ko lang sabihin sa'yo ang nararamdaman ko dahil ayokong maging unfair sa'yo lalo na at may namamagitan sa inyo ni Jace. I don't want you to think like I'm some kind of snake trying to lure him away from you because I'm not and I won't."

Kahit na sinubukan niyang pakalmahin ang nararamdaman ko ay hindi pa rin ako naging kampante. Naniniwala ako sa mga sinasabi niya. I believed her words because she was a great person, but seeing how great she was made me tremble in fear.

What if Jace suddenly realizes Isha's worth and see that she's actually greater than me?

Trust―A word that my inner voice suddenly shouted from deep within me.

"Whatever you two have now, I'm not planning to break it. I'm not planning to compete with you. I respect your relationship," she said. "Jace actually knows about my feelings for him in case you're wondering. He already clarified that he doesn't like me romantically, and I'm just like his sister. The one that he loves that is already long due before he realized is you. And don't worry because I already started the process of moving on."

Isha stood up and got her bag from the couch. She came closer to me, and I was stunned when she suddenly gave me an embrace.

"Even if I'm hurting deep inside, I'm still happy for him," she whispered. "I just hope that you wouldn't make him regret opening up himself to you."

Her last words played inside my head just like a riddle that I wasn't able to comprehend in an instant.

As soon as she took a step back away from me, the door opened, and Jace let himself in my office.

He was actually surprised to find Isha inside my office.

"Isha?" He sounded assure. "I thought you still have a meeting with a client?"

Isha smiled at him, and I can tell that it was full of love. "It ended earlier than expected. I closed the deal, by the way." She chuckled at her last sentence. "Well, I think I should leave you both and give you some privacy. I'll go to the powder room first. Excuse me."

She gave me one last smile and tapped Jace's shoulder as a greeting before she went out of my office.

Jace shot me a curious look and raised his eyebrows.

"Looks like you two just had a girl conversation thingy that she and my twin usually has," he guessed.

I just stared at him while trying to weigh his expression. Of course, he didn't have any clue.

"Did I do something wrong that I'm not aware of?" he asked. "Is it because I failed to drive you earlier? I thought it was okay with you. I could've said no to my mom―"

"Hindi 'yon, Jace," agad kong pagputol sa kanya. "I'm perfectly fine with that. It's your mom who needed you earlier."

"Then why?" he sounded slightly frustrated not knowing why I was acting indifferent.

"It's just that..." I sighed heavily before I continued. "You didn't tell me that Isha has feelings for you."

His forehead creased but he eventually relaxed when he finally understood.

"Zarina, it's not my feelings to tell, and I don't want to boast about it as well," he explained. "But if you want me to elaborate the details then, I will."

Napalunok naman ako at napatitig na lang sa kanya habang determinado siyang ipaliwanag sa akin.

"We were still in college when Isha first confessed to me about her feelings. I can't remember what year it was because I didn't pay attention to it that much. So when we graduated, she confessed for the second time," he told me. "She confessed again when I invited her to dinner to celebrate the success of our first project together. And when you came back, she asked me if you are the one that I was talking about―the girl I hated, and I confirmed it to her. The night when we were in Prive, she told me that she still feels the same and nothing has changed, but I told her that I don't feel the same way she does with me. I told her that it was you all along. That's why no matter how many times she confesses her feelings, it doesn't matter to me. Isha understands that it's you and she respects my feelings."

My heart ached for Isha. She had been rejected by Jace for so many times. I was complaining by the heartaches I've received from him when she experienced it countless of times.

Hindi ako makapaniwala. Mas ma-swerte pa pala ako.

I was so envy of her before for being so lucky when she was actually feeling the opposite.