WARNING!THIS FANFIC CONTAINS DEPICTIONS OF DEPRESSION AND I JUST WANT TO SAY,IN NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM, AM I TRYING TO ROMANTICIZE IT. I KNOW HOW SERIOUS IT IS, (HAVING KNOWN PEOPLE WITH THIS ISSUE). MAINLY SO THOSE WHO LOVE OUR ONE PIECE BOYS AS MUCH AS I DO, GET A CHANCE TO TRULY RELATE TO THE STORY. (BASICALLY, I'M SAYING THAT THOSE READING WITHSELF HARM GET A CHANCE TO CONNECT BETTER WITH THEIR FAVE CHARACTER.) ANY-WHO, I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS ONE.
On that gloomy yet calm morning you woke up more strangely than other days; you felt sadder and quieter than usual. Not that you were the hype and excited type of girl... you were still suffering from depression.
Almost two years passed when you found yourself in that depressed state.
Your oppressive family who treated you like an animal making you feel unwanted and not realizing your dreams, your 'friends' who turned you down and spoke ill of you... you couldn't stand all of that any more. At that time you never felt so alone and hated in your life that you began to suffer... and little by little your conditions worsened making you fall into depression. You started not sensing love or other feelings any more but hate and self-harm and some days were worse than others because the only way to let your grieve out was to cut yourself. So one day you decided to set sail from that hell and wandered many seas... until you reached the Grand Line, more specifically the stretch before the Red Line. One day, by travelling, you were caught by a storm that destroyed your ship and made you strand on a deserted and gloomy island... Kuragaina; where some mysterious yet gentle man, Dracule Mihawk, took you in out of pity.
And there you were, in his castle, for almost a good year. Mihawk didn't know anything about your true conditions and past and seemed not to care. You thought that on that day he saved you, you sufficiently showed your pathetic state of life that you wanted not to embarrass yourself any more; you didn't want to catch his attention neither you were searching compassion from him... so you chose to show your real self only when you were alone in your room at night; you tried to hold back but not only almost a month after you wanted to shout, cry and confess everything but you didn't find the courage to do that even if Mihawk revealed himself a good listener, maybe a friend who could help you... but you lost having confidence and faith in people since two years ago.
You woke up from bed and headed to the bathroom to get ready for the day.
"I look tremendous and pathetic" you thought seeing your red and puffy eyes for crying almost all night and then took a glance at the razor you used the evening before to cut yourself.
Dressed up for breakfast, you headed to the dining room and sat down at the table and while Mihawk was serving your plate he glared at you with concerning eyes.
"Are you okay, y/n? You seem down today".
"Y-yes Mihawk... I'm okay. I just didn't sleep well tonight" you tried to make something up and turned your eyes to the opposite way. You looked really down, almost dead inside, because that day depression decided to strike more and again on you like a strong and well-launched punch on the stomach.
You remained silent for the entire breakfast even without glancing for once at Mihawk until you finished your meal and stood up.
"If it doesn't bother you, I'm going to spend the morning in the library" you told him with a feeble voice getting a nod from the swordsman.
In this way you spent all morning reading different books... all about love and friendship. You felt like it was good hiding yourself and searching for a better life in other worlds; reading books was the only thing that made your life better and felt that something that your heart was needing.
