Excuse me? I'm calling from a Nokia right now. (Shitpost Book Uno)

Here, have a cold can of Windex.

Did you know that Windex cleans 99% of surface sins? *sprays windex in eyes* That's a lot of sin! Its so clean that not even birds can see it!

*walks into room filled with birds wearing masks*
Stop trying to summon the boogeyman you freaks.

~SCΛПÐΛL! was soon killed by the birds later that morning.~

Anyhow, hi! I'm SCΛПÐΛL! I like eating tidepods. With bleach. Wait no, that's not how you introduce yourself to people. Uh. K.

Anyways I hope you like this book