the thought of you: Ariana and Justin

Chapter 6

Chapter 6

After my long detention I make my way home. Miserable as ever, I don’t know how I am going to carry on living, or should I say surviving.

“Ariana” a little voice comes through my door, I stay silent and sat towards my wall. Not wanting to see anyone. Frankie hugs me and wipes a tear from my tear strained face. “Whats up?” he says. “Nothing” I lie. The last thing I want to do it have a break down like earlier in front of my brother. “I’m here for you” Frankie says, plonking down next to me. I give a fake smile, although I do appreciate what my brother is saying. “I’m sorry about acting all stupid lately” he says his voice cracking a little. “And I’m sorry for what I did” he says gesturing towards the diary “I’ve been a crap big brother and I want to make it up to you somehow” he says while giving me a tight hug. “It’s okay, I understand” I say. “What has been wrong?” I ask after a while. He stays silent and after an extremely long pause he says “trouble at school” and strides out of my room.

***

Days and days pass at school before Justin speaks to me again. I accidently bash into him in the corridor and it knocks a few of my text books to the floor “sorry” he mumbles as if it is his fault that I knocked into him. But his sorry has greater meaning behind it, rather than just being sorry for knocking my books out of my hands.

He helps me pick them up and when more and more people are getting to their next lessons the corridor is suddenly empty, silent. “It is not all how you think it is” Justin says, looking injured, he is about to apologise again when a sudden burst of anger rises through me and I start to shout at him.

“Justin, don’t you think you have hurt me enough? For god sake just leave me be. So your friends have asked you to be apologetic so you can just use me and hurt me again? Well you know what?” I say, taking a pause “You can shove that apology right up my ass” Justin looks startled, like he didn’t expect someone like me, who is too scared to even shout at a mouse to be ranting to one of his kind, the popular kind. “And you know what now I’ve started I might as well just tell you now. I liked you” I pause, “I liked you a lot” he is still frowning, his feelings unreadable. “But you played me about. Do you know how much that hurts? You messed around with my trust. And made me look like an idiot, by kissing me and getting my hopes up, you know what? Forget it.” I say running away from him before I start crying.

I feel relieved to have that all off my chest. Justin continues to look wounded throughout the day and we stay silent while doing our project, things are better this way.

As if Mrs Cranks knew about what just happened and wanted to make my life even more hellish she states at the end of class “This project must be finished as homework, you have this weekend and time next week to meet up with your partners outside of school to finish it.”

I quickly butt in “But Miss what if it is not possible to meet up with your partner outside of school?” “Then you make it possible or you fail the assignment” Mrs Cranks shouts. I look down, my attempt unsuccessful. So now I will have to meet up with Justin over the weekend. I cannot think of anything more awkward after what happened this afternoon.