I will never forget that woman’s face. I will never forget her words. I will never forget her wails and screams when she heard the verdict come back for her son’s murder, “Not Guilty.”
I couldn’t stay in New Orleans after that. I couldn’t bare the thought of possibly running into this mother again. And I would’ve gave up on being a public defender period, but my dad spent twenty-years in jail for a crime he didn’t commit, all because he didn’t have good legal representation. So I had to do it. Just somewhere else. So I went back to the A, where I was from.
“Christina, I can’t. I’m sorry. I will not defend this man.”
“Fine”, she took the file. “Thank you for understanding,” I was relieved.
AS I was about to walk out the door she said, “Don’t worry about coming in Monday. I’ll get someone else to handle those cases as well.” Was she threatening to fire me?
“Are you serious,” she cut off the lights in her office. “Yes. You don’t do the case. You don’t have a job.”
She picked up the file one last time. I reluctantly took it. “I knew I could count on you,” she smiled and walked out. “Close my door will you,” she yelled from down the hall.
I went to my office and got my things. As usual, I was the last one to leave. I felt sick to my stomach at how I just compromised everything I believed in. I sold my soul for a job, for the second time. At the rate I was going, I would have no soul left. All of it would be sold, piece by piece.
I felt tears trickle down my cheeks as I walked to the parking lot and got in my car. I put the key in the ignition.
“Are you fucking kidding me,” I turned the key once again. It wouldn’t start. There was only one other car in the lot, and whoever owned it wasn’t coming. I called AAA, and they told me I would have to wait an hour. I slammed my phone down on the passenger seat in frustration. Then I saw August walking toward his red Dodge Charger.
I was rude to him, but I needed a jump. I decided to walk over and apologize hoping that would convince him to help me.
“August,” I called out and jogged over. He totally ignored me and got in his car. He started the car up, and I stood in the back of it.
“So you’re going to just hit me,” I was scared because he moved it a little like he was. “Yeah, if you don’t get the fuck out the way.”
“Hey it’s not necessary to curse at me.” “Move out the fucking way,” he snapped.
“My car won’t start and I need a jump,” I pleaded through the back window. “That’s not my problem, ” he put the car in reverse again like he was going to hit me.
“I’m sorry I was rude okay. My boss was getting on my case, and I was irritated. I didn’t mean to belittle you.”
He turned off his car, got out and rushed toward me. “You hit me I’m calling he fucking police. They got cameras around here,” I warned. He picked me up and moved me.
As skinny as he was, that was a feat. I wasn’t a small girl. As he walked back to his car, I grabbed the arm of his black hoodie. He looked at my hand, then my face. That was all I needed to quickly let go.
“I said I was sorry,” I felt like a little kid peering up at him. He was taller than I had remembered. “No, you only sorry because you need my help.”
“That’s not true. Work is stressing me out and I…,” tears started to roll profusely from my eyes. He clenched his jaw and looked me in my eyes un-phased. I was so embarrassed that I cried in front of him like that, but it was beginning to be too much. I wiped my eyes. “Forget it,” I walked back to my car.
CHAPTER 3
Start from the beginning
